Is this charecter a Mary-Sue?

Started by Haz December 15th, 2009 2:14 AM
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  • 12 replies

Haz

Haz ya seen my hack?

Female
Australia- Aussie, Aussie, Aussie!, Oi, Oi, Oi!
Seen August 16th, 2011
Posted October 21st, 2010
698 posts
14.5 Years
Hi guys, hows it going? As some of you may be aware, I'm writing a Twilight fanfiction (You can read it here) which is my longest FF ever with 10 chapters and which features a OC of mine, Shayla. After taking a MS quiz , I'm worried that he's becoming one. So what better way to figure if she is one or not, then to turn to my friends (if you don't mind me calling you that) at the FF lounge and tell them about Shayla. And then you can tell me your opinions. I wrote an entire 'article' of it like it would appear on a Wiki :P. I have no life lol.

Oh, bw, my FF is set in the Twilight universe around 2006-2009 or whenever Twilight was first written XD.

In an attchment cause I'm lazy :P.

Oh and please don't comment on the bad grammer since I only wrote it as a bit of fun and didn't plan to show it to the world XD
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Age 36
Seen 17 Hours Ago
Posted 2 Days Ago
I'm scanning the bio a bit now (and reminding myself that I need to finish reading the Twilight series), but I can say that it's not the character herself that would define her as the Sue. It's the way that you write about her. If the world revolves around her, everything goes her way, all good characters like her and all bad characters don't like her, then she would be considered a Sue. Just looking at the bio, it could go either way. It's the story that she's in that would help determine that.

So right now, I can't say how Shayla is as a character. When I read your story and see how she fits in with the rest of the characters and the setting of the Twilight world, then I'll be able to tell.

I'd just like to apologize for the fact that you're writing a Twilight fic on a forum where people who like Twilight are scared off by insults. (Except for the moderator. I like the book series.)

Avatar credit: Fairy

Haz

Haz ya seen my hack?

Female
Australia- Aussie, Aussie, Aussie!, Oi, Oi, Oi!
Seen August 16th, 2011
Posted October 21st, 2010
698 posts
14.5 Years
Ok then, thanks for reading. I'm trying not to make her a Sue but at the same time, it seems the harder I try, the worse she gets. :/ According to a Mary Sue quiz the one that Feigh posted in Skyblue's Mary Sue thread), she's on the way to becoming a Sue but isn't one yet.

Oh and a tip, only read my fic if you have time. Some of the chapters are getting on to be 3000 to 4,000 words. XD
DeviantART: Haz-Za

Fanfiction.net: Ha-Za-A


Credits to Galukxy for this awesome banner :)

Bay

She/They
Dani California
Seen 6 Hours Ago
Posted 7 Hours Ago
6,347 posts
17 Years
Ok then, thanks for reading. I'm trying not to make her a Sue but at the same time, it seems the harder I try, the worse she gets. :/ According to a Mary Sue quiz the one that Feigh posted in Skyblue's Mary Sue thread), she's on the way to becoming a Sue but isn't one yet.

Oh and a tip, only read my fic if you have time. Some of the chapters are getting on to be 3000 to 4,000 words. XD
Those Mary Sue quizzes also don't determine if your character is a Sue or not. Instead they test on common personality traits. However, just because your character has some common Sue traits doesn't mean they are a Sue.

Like Astinus said, it depends the world revolving the character or not. I actually gave more detail in SkyBlue's thread.

Bah, what's with people worrying their character is a Sue and people trying to write bad guides about them x_x.
Miles Edgeworth
Foul Play [On Hiatus]
Age 31
Male
Rokkenjima
Seen May 19th, 2014
Posted November 7th, 2013
385 posts
13.9 Years
"Everything you do is Mary Sue." --a quote from Nokyo-chan.

Meaning every character is going to have some degree of Mary-sueness to make them an interesting character. Not to say that you should make them as Mary Sue as possible--it means that you should reminded yourself that your character has to be exciting enough to read.

"To me, jumping out into the rainy sky on a mad night is nothing more than a bit of fun to go with a drink." -Kinzo
She/Her
Earth-199999
Seen November 5th, 2022
Posted December 5th, 2021
1,787 posts
14.4 Years
I'm not sure about her being full Mary Sue or anything, because you provide enough information to where it doesn't appear like she is. There are a few things that could lead someone to thinking she is though. Like her ability to communicate so well with animals, especially when she is a human. I mean sure, you can understand an animal's feelings and such, but some things seemed over the top. Also I'm thinking that her being a vampire and having the ability to turn into a cheetah is a little much.

Her background seems perfectly fine though. Nothing screams Mary Sue there. The only thing that would make a person wonder would be the whole learning to read and write herself, but that's a perfectly fine thing because people do obviously do that and if she couldn't afford to go to school, then she...well, couldn't. So I'd say she's not really a Mary Sue at all =)

SkyBlue

I'm in love...with Ash!

Age 33
Female
Philippines
Seen March 7th, 2010
Posted February 21st, 2010
124 posts
13.5 Years
Well, she's not a full Mary-Sue. I like how she's written, and also her back-story. Just...well...ninja-like? I haven't seen any vampire be like a ninja (does Edward sneaking into Bella's room count?).

BTW, off-topic, it seems as if you're basing the story on the movies. Try basing at least a bit of it on the books.

"Our hearts are made of fragile glass. One crack and we have no more heart. We must take care of it."

Maxim

Heavy Metal Alchemist

Srakaland Graveyard
Seen February 17th, 2021
Posted January 6th, 2021
650 posts
18.2 Years
Late for the party but as I writer I can say one thing.

There is one thing worse than a Mary Sue - it's paranoid avoidance of Mary Sue. That leads to creation of even more terrible characters.

Also, not every Mary Sue FanFic must be bad.
Still alive, still a Pokemon fan, even though I wish I wasn't anymore...

SkyBlue

I'm in love...with Ash!

Age 33
Female
Philippines
Seen March 7th, 2010
Posted February 21st, 2010
124 posts
13.5 Years
Late for the party but as I writer I can say one thing.

There is one thing worse than a Mary Sue - it's paranoid avoidance of Mary Sue. That leads to creation of even more terrible characters.

Also, not every Mary Sue FanFic must be bad.
Like the parody fan fics? Or this one fic where the author inserted a Mary-Sue on purpose to torture her?

"Our hearts are made of fragile glass. One crack and we have no more heart. We must take care of it."