A poem i wrote

Started by Kimi-Kaizer November 8th, 2004 3:05 PM
  • 689 views
  • 5 replies
Age 34
Japan
Seen March 1st, 2005
Posted February 13th, 2005
294 posts
18.6 Years
i wrote a peom in school today and here it is:

You Dont Understand

You worry about whats on the outside,
by ignoring what's on the inside,
rejecting the inside feelings and the heart and soul.
I'm sure that you must care deep inside but your just afraid to let it out
why hide it from me? why judge me by my looks? when its whats inside that counts.
Dont judge a book by its cover maybe books dont have feelings but people like me do and you dont understand the everyday life i hafta go through.
Why bother talking to me? why not just ignore me? I'm so uncool, like its hard to pretend im not there.
I have feelings too, and if you wanna see them hurt your not gonna get far. You can talk to the hand and just go away and stay out of my life. You'll only make matters worse.


Im not sure if it falls under being a peom the because its basically my thoughts too

Kyosuke

.·Simple Complexity

Age 34
Pickering, On
Seen August 8th, 2018
Posted May 17th, 2014
2,485 posts
19.7 Years
I would say that its a poem, because its your on personal feelings, what most or all poems are about.

I really did like it, it sort of described my life, and how I feel at school so I can relate.

And I think you meant "poem" for the thread title, I'll just edit it ^^.
"Life isn't perfect, but sometimes you have to make the best of it."

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·!¦[·Latest pieces of Writing·]¦!·
Age 62
Male
Melbourne, Australia
Seen April 26th, 2018
Posted June 9th, 2014
11,439 posts
19.7 Years
It's good, but it's pOEm not pEOm XD, and it needs line breaks in those really long lines where it rhymes.


"One reason why mathematics enjoys special esteem, above all other sciences, is that its laws are absolutely certain and indisputable, while those of other sciences are to some extent debatable and in constant danger of being overthrown by newly discovered facts."
Albert Einstein

"What science can there be more noble, more excellent, more useful for men, more admirably high and demonstrative than mathematics."
Benjamin Franklin

"Mathematics, rightly viewed, possesses not only truth, but supreme beauty – a beauty cold and austere, like that of sculpture, without appeal to any part of our weaker nature, without the gorgeous trappings of paintings or music, yet sublimely pure and capable of a stern perfection such as only the greatest art can show."
Bertrand Russell

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ANNOY ME AT YOUR PERIL. I am becoming increasingly tired of the unmanly elitism and closed-mindedness of certain members who shall remain unnamed.
Age 62
Male
Melbourne, Australia
Seen April 26th, 2018
Posted June 9th, 2014
11,439 posts
19.7 Years
There's nothing wrong with the pOEm itself, just the line breaks :P


"One reason why mathematics enjoys special esteem, above all other sciences, is that its laws are absolutely certain and indisputable, while those of other sciences are to some extent debatable and in constant danger of being overthrown by newly discovered facts."
Albert Einstein

"What science can there be more noble, more excellent, more useful for men, more admirably high and demonstrative than mathematics."
Benjamin Franklin

"Mathematics, rightly viewed, possesses not only truth, but supreme beauty – a beauty cold and austere, like that of sculpture, without appeal to any part of our weaker nature, without the gorgeous trappings of paintings or music, yet sublimely pure and capable of a stern perfection such as only the greatest art can show."
Bertrand Russell

avatar and signature by FoxHound

ANNOY ME AT YOUR PERIL. I am becoming increasingly tired of the unmanly elitism and closed-mindedness of certain members who shall remain unnamed.