Ditto

Started by Mr. L January 9th, 2011 4:54 AM
  • 620 views
  • 4 replies
Age 31
Male
United Kingdom
Seen August 26th, 2011
Posted August 14th, 2011
105 posts
12.7 Years
I haven't wrote a poem in a while, this is a piece of Pokemon poetry written from Ditto's perspective.

Another face,
One that you pull and I pull back,
Another grace,
Created through the same attack,

Look into my painted eyes,
See yourself deep within,
Hear the truth behind the lies,
Find another speech to spin,

A gift to live out any life,
Yet you tell me who to follow,
I could walk alone without strife,
But you chain me down to sorrow,

I am the one seen on parade,
Called so much from the same name
Like a magician’s charade,
All different but still the same,

Another moving mass of clay,
I shall satisfy them and you,
Left alone for another day,
While we both wait for something new.

And really low quality for some reason...
Age 28
Male
NY
Seen January 29th, 2014
Posted January 14th, 2014
1,290 posts
15.8 Years
Nice poem, it really did reflect a ditto's perspective. Nice rhyme scheme too, the only problem I have is with the second stanza. You have an abab scheme the whole poem, but in the second stanza the second and forth line don't rhyme. It's not that big of a deal, just try and stay consistent with rhymes
Why, Yes
Chris Martin is my avatar.

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PM for FC
Age 31
Male
United Kingdom
Seen August 26th, 2011
Posted August 14th, 2011
105 posts
12.7 Years
the only problem I have is with the second stanza. You have an abab scheme the whole poem, but in the second stanza the second and forth line don't rhyme.
I can't believe I missed that, well, writing in the early hours of the morning will cause stuff like that to happen. Thanks a lot for pointing it out, I've changed:

Look into my painted eyes,
See yourself staring back,
Hear the truth behind the lies,
Find another thing to say,

to

Look into my painted eyes,
See yourself deep within,
Hear the truth behind the lies,
Find another speech to spin,

It's not perfect, but I think its an improvement, thanks a lot to both of you for your feedback.

And really low quality for some reason...