Hello~
First off, it's probably not a good idea to change the font of your story - not to mention changing it many times over the course of one post. It's much easier to leave the story in the default font, that way it's easier on the eyes for people to read. It may look visually appealing to you, but for the rest of us with different kinds of layouts, your font might be hard to read through and it turns prospective readers away.
His name was Marcus. His violet hair matched the violet long-sleeve shirt he wore, and his pants were the white of a ghost. His skin was a peachy-like color, and his violet eyes were deep and full of thought.
I've never been too fond of starting a story out with what a character looks like, and usually it's because the writer tends to either go overboard with the descriptions of the character (i.e. gratuitous clothing detail) or conversely don't go into enough detail about the character, period. While there's nothing wrong with explaining what your character looks like at the beginning, this particular description shows us nothing of his personality. Much like how people express themselves through clothing, you're expressing a part of your character through what they wear, if indeed clothing matters at all to your character's personality. If they're simply 'normal' and don't think too much of what they wear - why go into great detail about what he's wearing at that exact moment? Unless this description relates to his character somehow, try to change it to be more descriptive of
him and not more of the clothes. The fact that he is wearing a violet long-sleeved shirt, or that his pants are white tells us nothing of who he is.
As for the descriptions themselves, I think you could do better than using words such as "violet", "peach", and saying that his eyes were "deep and full of thought". There are many shades of violet and peach, and considering this takes place in the 'real world' and not in an anime, this is more important than ever. Take a look at your own skin for example - is it
just a peach color? Or are you tan from being outdoors? Maybe you have some scars somewhere? You need a good dose of realism in your descriptions to bring the reader down to earth - more specifically our planet earth, and to do that you're going to want to re-think all of your descriptions. What's more realistic - a boy with violet hair and violet eyes, or a boy with brown hair and brown eyes? I'll grant you the fact hair can be dyed, but violet eyes are very rare, and unless they are contacts I would highly advise you to change that.
As for the "deep and full of thought" description, what do eyes that are "deep and full of thought" even look like? You're going to have to show your reader, not tell them. :)
"Peachy-like" would sound much better as "Peach-like", and "his pants were the white of a ghost" should be "his pants were white
like a ghost". No one really knows what a ghost truly looks like or if they even exist, and your original description makes it sound like it's a fact that ghosts are white.
He stood on the peak of Mt. Way, a rocky and steep slope. At the top, he knew he had one mission. Holdin the blood-red stone in front of him, Marcus mumbled some words in some sort of chant-like rhythm. The stone bean to glow faintly, and as Marcus kept humming or mumbling, or whatever he was doing, the glow would grow stronger. Finally, the stone cooled down, though now it was a dark shade of navy. Marcus dropped the stone of the peak and watched it roll down, chipping and breaking. It didn't matter. Marcus had successfully released what was sealed within the stone, and that was enough.
Again in this first sentence, you're telling the reader instead of showing them. You're
telling us that he had one mission, instead of using description to show us. While telling instead of showing works in some cases, I'm afraid here it would be best to show us rather than tell us. You want the reader to focus on the fact he is holding a stone in front of him, and that this is important. He's not just casually holding a rock in the palm of his hand and tossing it off the side of the mountain - this stone has importance. Putting in a sentence that tells us "he knew he had one mission" seems redundant and could even be cut, provided that you 'show' us he's on a mission.
Also, "holdin" should be "holding". "The blood-red stone" should be "a blood-red stone", because you're introducing us into the story and the stone.
Holdin the blood-red stone in front of him, Marcus mumbled some words in some sort of chant-like rhythm. The stone bean to glow faintly, and as Marcus kept humming or mumbling, or whatever he was doing, the glow would grow stronger.
Marcus had successfully released what was sealed within the stone, and that was enough.
This narration seems inconsistent with your previous claim that Marcus was 'on a mission'. Usually people who have specific goals in mind know what they are doing, and they do it well. In the first quote above, your narrator claims Marcus is in "some sort of chant-like rhythm", and "humming or mumbling, or whatever he was doing". In the second quote after, suddenly we're aware that "whatever he was doing" was releasing something in the stone. Normally I might be able to pass that off as an unreliable narrator, but it seems more inconsistent than it is unreliable and I don't think it was intentional.
To clear it up, I would get rid of the 'grey' words in there like 'some sort of' and 'whatever' and make it pretty clear what he's doing. Not as in get rid of your mysterious feel and go into explicit detail, but try to solidify the fact that Marcus knows what he is doing, even if we don't know
what it is he is doing. Right now you make it seem like Marcus has no idea what he's doing and doesn't really care what he's doing, yet he's determined and on a mission. It's a bit of a contradiction. (I hope that makes sense...)
Now, as for the content of your story, I'm having a hard time believing your characters and your back story. Marcus released something at this mountain which could possibly be dangerous, yet even though it could hurt a lot of people he doesn't seem to care at all. Why would you release something when you don't even know what you're releasing? Even if he's a sociopath and doesn't care, I have a hard time believing he'd just do this for someone without even asking what it is.
A better question though, is that if Hisan is so enamored with this little event, why didn't he himself go release it? Wouldn't it have been easier to do it himself than to send someone who obviously has no idea what's going on?
As for your 'villains', the Pokémon company, as amusing as your portrayal of them is I just can't take it seriously enough to even consider this as a viable plot. It doesn't make any sense at all that the Pokémon company would hide the existence of an entire planet just because they wouldn't make any more money. In fact, I'd think they'd get even
more money if they were real. I don't understand how making them real would be anything
but a positive to their income. They can't possibly get in trouble for it, because if someone at the Pokémon company found a planet full of beings to base this franchise on, I'm sure NASA or some other research-based center would have picked up on it long before they even knew about the whole planet.
Overall, I think that while this is a decent fic you could do well with a little more planning ahead. Outlining a little bit never hurts, and it could help you make sure things make sense. Your descriptions could also use a little bit of polishing, especially since this is supposed to be a "real-life" based fiction. I did enjoy the overall tone of the chapter though, and you've got a good grasp on how to tell stories. Just keep trying and you'll get better in no time. ;D