I'm sorry, but only finished chapters can be posted:
Do not post unfinished work.
If your chapter is not finished, then there is no need to post it. Use a word processing program to type your fic in so you can have all the time to work on it. An unfinished chapter/story will result in a closed thread.
Going to close this seeing this is the second time I've told you this. Hence I strongly advise for you to don't type up your story in the reply box as it'll likely result in lower quality, and typing it up in the reply box isn't anything to boast about either. Take the time to write it and save your work in a program (you don't need Word if you don't have it - there's Wordpad, OpenOffice which is free to download, and so forth) as well as proofread and edit it.
I might add more to this post soonish... but as a beside,
your Bleeding Moon fic got two reviews so I'm unsure why you say you have been never reviewed. =/
Certainly the story could do with some edits, I feel - for instance with the opening paragraph:
He portrayed Leslie's careless personality perfectly, each detail screaming a fact about what most would interpret as a simple kitten.
This sentence was rather confusing to me - it implies that each detail in the personality or picture screams facts or kittens, in all honesty when first reading it and I'm still unsure what exactly you are trying to say after rereading it. It's too confusing and too elaborate in my opinion, and could use some rewording.
Tommorow was also the final day that Nicholas would ever see his little sister again, and the worst part about that was a few minutes ago, Nicholas had yelled at her harshly and locked her in the basement to teach her a lesson.
This seems a bit questionable as well for a boy to just go and lock someone in the cupboard like that, personally, along, as well as the parents to not check up on their daughter (btw, what had they been back from? such details were not made clear at the start of the scene so it came as a surprise for them to come back), and with Nick not noticing or hearing her fall either felt unrealistic to me. It certainly makes for an interesting situation, but it could be better carried, imo. Also, Tomorrow.
They sent NIcholas to bed, assuming that Peg was already sleeping.
Then there's minor errors like that as well that a word processor's spell and grammar checker would pick.
Overall you have the beginnings of an interesting concept, but it needs a fair bit of tidying up and some editing as the mistakes and somewhat rushed events distract from the story itself.