The Rainbow Connection [LGBTS Club] Page 91

Started by Shining Raichu May 22nd, 2011 5:52 AM
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Shining Raichu

Expect me like you expect Jesus.

Age 32
Male
Australia
Seen October 17th, 2020
Posted December 21st, 2017
8,958 posts
12.3 Years
Oh, I see :(

*hugs*

When I came out to my parents, I had to make sure that I had my head right around it and I made absolutely sure I was not stressed about it in the slightest. I did it in the most flippant way possible. I didn't sit them down and say "I need to tell you something", I just said it off-hand in a conversation so they didn't get the opportunity to make a big deal out of it. They still tried of course, but I shot them down immediately.
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-Jared-

Certified Responsible Adult

Age 31
Male
Northern California
Seen June 16th, 2022
Posted June 14th, 2014
1,817 posts
14.2 Years
1. Pikapal where have you been?!
Lurking! xD I didn't have much to say on all the transgendered topics, since everyone else already pretty much said what I feel. :P Lol, I only seem to post when the topic is about gay people. >__>

No, there's a few reasons. I think it's primarily because my Grandma died a month ago, and I saw a commercial of a guy about my age driving his grandma to see the house she grew up in. I didn't cry when they told me she died, or at the funeral, but when I saw that commercial, coupled with stressing myself out over trying to tell him, and a few other things. I just couldn't handle it.
-hugs QuilavaKing as well- ;__;

Stress is like, a really horrible thing. Compounded with a relative dying, and it even worse. I remember my grandfather dying, and I cried a bit during it, but I cried the most months after the funeral and hearing others talk about their grandfathers. So yeah, I think I understand how you feel. ;__;

Alice

(>^.(>0.0)>

Age 31
Female
Oregon
Seen April 30th, 2015
Posted April 29th, 2015
3,077 posts
14.2 Years
I should also clarify that when I say nervous breakdown I mean I cried for a few minutes. I haven't cried in so many years I didn't even remember what it was like... or understand how it was possible to lose control of your emotions that much.

-Jared-

Certified Responsible Adult

Age 31
Male
Northern California
Seen June 16th, 2022
Posted June 14th, 2014
1,817 posts
14.2 Years
I should also clarify that when I say nervous breakdown I mean I cried for a few minutes. I haven't cried in so many years I didn't even remember what it was like... or understand how it was possible to lose control of your emotions that much.
A few minutes, a few hours, doesn't make much of a difference to me. :\ I'm really sorry that happened to you. ;__;

Alice

(>^.(>0.0)>

Age 31
Female
Oregon
Seen April 30th, 2015
Posted April 29th, 2015
3,077 posts
14.2 Years
When I came out to my parents, I had to make sure that I had my head right around it and I made absolutely sure I was not stressed about it in the slightest. I did it in the most flippant way possible. I didn't sit them down and say "I need to tell you something", I just said it off-hand in a conversation so they didn't get the opportunity to make a big deal out of it. They still tried of course, but I shot them down immediately.
Yeah, that's more or less what I was trying to do originally. I hung out with them all valentine's day expecting him to mention my lack of a girlfriend at some point, and I'd intentionally talk myself into a corner, so it seems like I'm not intentionally coming out. Obviously, no one ever mentioned it, even though almost every show we watched that night had some mention of gays, and one of them even had a father think his son was coming out to him when he really wasn't. (Which was just a joke, since it was a comedy, but still.)


I even watched two episodes of Smash, even though I barely know who Marilyn Monroe is, nor do I have any interest in theater, and they didn't suspect that there was possibly some other reason that I was spending time with them.

TwiDragon

The fun shawl be doubled!

Age 28
Male
Virginia, USA
Seen May 30th, 2012
Posted May 13th, 2012
367 posts
11.4 Years
I have opened up to my dad, and while things where kept simple and blunt. It went well.

I'm really glad that I have parents that accept me <3

I don't want to turn this thread back into transgender'd themed, but I'm really happy. I feel more like "me" than ever before ^.^

Shining Raichu

Expect me like you expect Jesus.

Age 32
Male
Australia
Seen October 17th, 2020
Posted December 21st, 2017
8,958 posts
12.3 Years
The one thing I learned form my experience is that people will only see what they want to see. I was so sure before I came out that my parents already knew I was gay. I was an 18 year old boy who had never ever had a girlfriend, much less even shown interest in a girl, and I voluntarily watched Gilmore Girls, Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy. The fact that my mother hints constantly to my sister that she needs to find a boyfriend and never even approached the subject of me finding a girlfriend made me think "heyyy... yeah they totally know." So when I flippantly told them, I honestly wasn't expecting much of a reaction.

But they had no freaking clue whatsoever. Apparently despite the 83 clues I'd left them, the fact that I wasn't effeminate in my mannerisms or speech apparently made it impossible to figure out. So yeah, I'm not surprised that they picked up on none of your clues lol.

Lurking! xD I didn't have much to say on all the transgendered topics, since everyone else already pretty much said what I feel. :P Lol, I only seem to post when the topic is about gay people. >__>
lmao yeah I get what you're saying. I find it fascinating to read about all the transgendered topics but I find it hard coming up with things to contribute!
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Age 29
Male
Ameristrous
Seen March 6th, 2012
Posted February 29th, 2012
37 posts
11.3 Years
meh, I had a crappy 'coming out' to my parents :( and then they forgot it happened 'til they caught me E-dating, and they've forgot once again, and I don't feel like doing it again because I don't want to hear their bigotrist crap again >:(
Black FC: 2323- 0650-0296 PM me if you want to add my FC for Black :)

-Jared-

Certified Responsible Adult

Age 31
Male
Northern California
Seen June 16th, 2022
Posted June 14th, 2014
1,817 posts
14.2 Years
meh, I had a crappy 'coming out' to my parents :( and then they forgot it happened 'til they caught me E-dating, and they've forgot once again, and I don't feel like doing it again because I don't want to hear their bigotrist crap again >:(
Aww, I feel so bad for you...;___; When you can move out on your own, it'll get better. You will be better able to ignore their bigotrist crap, if you so choose. :3

lmao yeah I get what you're saying. I find it fascinating to read about all the transgendered topics but I find it hard coming up with things to contribute!
That's why I just posted a quick thanks for all the info a while back. xD

Also, on the topic of coming out! xD My parents were completely shocked. Of course, they found out when I was 15, so I hadn't had as much time to have them wonder about lack of girlfriends and whatnot. :P What was funnier was when my brother found out, since I was 20 when he found out, was that he also never had a clue. He just figured I was socially awkward (which is still true, just, not relevant in this case. xD) So he sat there all like "Woah" and I just said "Lemme guess, you're thinking...IT ALL MAKES SENSE" and he just laughed and replied "YES IT DOES"

Alice

(>^.(>0.0)>

Age 31
Female
Oregon
Seen April 30th, 2015
Posted April 29th, 2015
3,077 posts
14.2 Years
The one thing I learned form my experience is that people will only see what they want to see. I was so sure before I came out that my parents already knew I was gay. I was an 18 year old boy who had never ever had a girlfriend, much less even shown interest in a girl, and I voluntarily watched Gilmore Girls, Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy. The fact that my mother hints constantly to my sister that she needs to find a boyfriend and never even approached the subject of me finding a girlfriend made me think "heyyy... yeah they totally know." So when I flippantly told them, I honestly wasn't expecting much of a reaction.

But they had no freaking clue whatsoever. Apparently despite the 83 clues I'd left them, the fact that I wasn't effeminate in my mannerisms or speech apparently made it impossible to figure out. So yeah, I'm not surprised that they picked up on none of your clues lol.
Well, I'm a 20 year old guy who's never showed any interest in girls, lol. I've even been asked out a few times, and turned them down every time. Then again, I've always used to say "Games are more fun than girls." when someone asked me why I didn't have a girlfriend, which was entirely true at the time, so I suppose they don't have any reason to think otherwise at this point.

My mom does already know as far as I know though. (Unless she forgot or something. I can't honestly tell. lol) I told her not to tell my dad because I wanted to do it myself, and then just never did. I decided that it didn't matter enough, and if he ever actually asked me, I would tell him. For some reason, I just feel like I need to now though. I don't know why.

TwiDragon

The fun shawl be doubled!

Age 28
Male
Virginia, USA
Seen May 30th, 2012
Posted May 13th, 2012
367 posts
11.4 Years
^I know whatcha mean. I was going to wait to tell my dad, but I was just afraid that I would get caught doing something, and a scene would break out. I told him, and everything was fine. If your parents love you, then they will accept you ^.^

Shining Raichu

Expect me like you expect Jesus.

Age 32
Male
Australia
Seen October 17th, 2020
Posted December 21st, 2017
8,958 posts
12.3 Years
meh, I had a crappy 'coming out' to my parents :( and then they forgot it happened 'til they caught me E-dating, and they've forgot once again, and I don't feel like doing it again because I don't want to hear their bigotrist crap again >:(
Don't believe for a second that they "forgot". They didn't forget a thing, that's quite simply not something you forget. They're trying to pretend that it doesn't exist in the hope that it'll go away.
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Alice

(>^.(>0.0)>

Age 31
Female
Oregon
Seen April 30th, 2015
Posted April 29th, 2015
3,077 posts
14.2 Years
Don't believe for a second that they "forgot". They didn't forget a thing, that's quite simply not something you forget. They're trying to pretend that it doesn't exist in the hope that it'll go away.
Yeah, I kind of figure that's the case with my mom as well. Maybe I should just tell her at the same time as if neither of them know.

TornZero

Resident Yuri-ism Cult Leader

Age 29
Female
In your pantry, eatin' your delicious cake.
Seen September 10th, 2013
Posted July 10th, 2013
1,137 posts
13.1 Years
God, I need to post in here more. >< I can never seem to find something to say that hasn't already been said before, but when I do, I feel like I start to ramble. So I shall put my rambling in spoilers.

But first, a belated welcome to [Snivy Baroque] from another random member!

^I know whatcha mean. I was going to wait to tell my dad, but I was just afraid that I would get caught doing something, and a scene would break out. I told him, and everything was fine. If your parents love you, then they will accept you ^.^
I can't say anything about acceptance from one's parents unless they're fairly open-minded (darn you, lucky people here with tolerant parents!); you're more likely to get acceptance from any siblings you may have, since they've likely seen most of the same things you have.

Spoiler:
I haven't personally come out to my family (though my older brother found out and, in spite of his Christianity, supports it as part of me and hasn't told anyone), but my little brother one day just told our parents and everyone else that he was gay. (It was just last year, him being 14 at the time.) Since our mom has a gay aunt (and I think this helped a little), she decided to leave what happens to him to God, but both she and our dad try to avoid having to admit to anyone that he's gay.

Granted (and I honestly agree with them a little on this), because of his age, they think it's likely a phase. He brought up the topic almost completely at random (but failed to keep it from being serious), and he acts with little knowledge of the community. It really just feels like he's exploring right now, and until another year or so passes without any changes (when he's 16-18 and he's actually thinking more with his head than his curiosity, as per the majority of my family's off-topic experiences), I doubt that feeling will change. But exploring is just fine with me; and if he comes to realize he's not gay? Our parents will probably be overjoyed, considering their aforementioned reaction.

I will be moving my account to Songbird over the course of immediately. The signature will stay as is for posterity and reference.

Shining Raichu

Expect me like you expect Jesus.

Age 32
Male
Australia
Seen October 17th, 2020
Posted December 21st, 2017
8,958 posts
12.3 Years
Yeah, I kind of figure that's the case with my mom as well. Maybe I should just tell her at the same time as if neither of them know.
I wouldn't bother lol - she knows. I'd just bring a guy home to meet her one time and see what happens haha.

TornZero, don't worry about rambling lol - we love that here! I'm not as sure as you are that your brother's sexuality is just a phase. I read somewhere that male sexuality is stagnant, while female sexuality can be fluid. So while females may go through phases like this, it's highly less likely that males will ever change. So unless he's doing it for attention (which is not something I would ever do for attention but I digress) then I think he could be the real deal. Of course, I have no science or references to back this up and it's just my opinion, but I did read it somewhere I'm sure of it lol
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Alice

(>^.(>0.0)>

Age 31
Female
Oregon
Seen April 30th, 2015
Posted April 29th, 2015
3,077 posts
14.2 Years
I wouldn't bother lol - she knows. I'd just bring a guy home to meet her one time and see what happens haha.
Haha, if only. I'm pretty sure I'm the only gay guy in town though. lol

TornZero

Resident Yuri-ism Cult Leader

Age 29
Female
In your pantry, eatin' your delicious cake.
Seen September 10th, 2013
Posted July 10th, 2013
1,137 posts
13.1 Years
TornZero, don't worry about rambling lol - we love that here! I'm not as sure as you are that your brother's sexuality is just a phase. I read somewhere that male sexuality is stagnant, while female sexuality can be fluid. So while females may go through phases like this, it's highly less likely that males will ever change.
Mine's actually pretty unpredictable; I use "bisexual" because it's easier for people to understand than "fluid."

As for my li'l bro, he's the youngest in my family and acts like the typical "family baby." It's actually believable with him if he does something like this to get attention. At least he made a friend/boyfriend that he actually enjoys being around out of it, so romantic orientation I have no doubts about.

I will be moving my account to Songbird over the course of immediately. The signature will stay as is for posterity and reference.

Shining Raichu

Expect me like you expect Jesus.

Age 32
Male
Australia
Seen October 17th, 2020
Posted December 21st, 2017
8,958 posts
12.3 Years
Well I guess it doesn't really matter either way. It's sweet that he's found somebody so young :P though for him to have found a boyfriend is a pretty big commitment to an attention-seeking endeavour. It means if he does turn out to be straight in the end, he'll never live it down haha.
Moderator of General Chat

TornZero

Resident Yuri-ism Cult Leader

Age 29
Female
In your pantry, eatin' your delicious cake.
Seen September 10th, 2013
Posted July 10th, 2013
1,137 posts
13.1 Years
My family doesn't let anyone else in the family live anything down. I mentioned a couple hundred posts back that the 12-year-old niece of my mom's co-worker flat out said, "He's HO~T," about my little brother. We still make a joke out of it, even though it's been a few months now.

I will be moving my account to Songbird over the course of immediately. The signature will stay as is for posterity and reference.