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Old January 29th, 2005 (7:08 PM). Edited January 29th, 2005 by Kelsey.
Kelsey Kelsey is offline
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    I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly,
    I'll do what it takes 'till I touch the sky.
    I'll believe in myself with my heart and my soul,
    And I'll break away...break away...break away.

    I'll soar to the moon and I'll kiss the stars,
    I'll circle the Earth, which has now become ours.
    I'll dive into the depths of your silvery eyes,
    And we'll break away...break away...break away.

    Out of the darkness and into the sun,
    I won't forget the ones that I love.
    Take a risk, take a chance, make a change,
    And break away...break away...break away.

    Well, this is my newest creation. This poem is based on the song "Break Away" which some of you may be familiar with. Well, I hope this poem inflicts positive energy in the reader, enjoy! =D

    ~Kelsey
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      #2    
    Old January 29th, 2005 (7:09 PM).
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    MegaDitto MegaDitto is offline
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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Kelsey
    I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly,
    I'll do what it takes 'till I touch the sky.
    I'll believe in myself with my heart and my soul,
    And I'll break away...break away...break away.

    I'll soar to the moon and I'll kiss the stars,
    I'll circle the Earth which has now become ours.
    I'll dive into the depths of your silvery eyes,
    And we'll break away...break away...break away.

    Out of the darkness and into the sun,
    I won't forget the ones that I love.
    Take a risk, take a chance, make a change,
    And break away...break away...break away.

    Well, this is my newest creation. This poem is based on the song "Break Away" which some of you may be familiar with. Well, I hope this poem inflicts positive energy in the reader, enjoy! =D

    ~Kelsey
    I loved it 10/10.
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      #3    
    Old January 29th, 2005 (7:10 PM).
    Kelsey Kelsey is offline
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      Awwwws, thank you MegaDitto. ^__^ I'm glad you loved it. Oh! I got a 10/10 sweet! XD

      ~Kelsey
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      Old January 29th, 2005 (7:12 PM).
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        OO teh, that's really good!
        *wishes she could write poems (let alone spell them)* X3
        I give it a 9.5/10, becaouse nothing is perfect, this is practly as close to perfect as anyone can get >>
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        Old January 29th, 2005 (7:18 PM).
        Kelsey Kelsey is offline
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          Awwwwwws, thanks Suz. I'm really glad you liked it. And you're right, nothing is perfect, for there is always room for improvement. ^_~

          ~Kelsey
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            #6    
          Old January 29th, 2005 (7:33 PM).
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            That was a nice positive type poem, it gives off the feeling of confidence in everything you do, and not always doing things of the norm and just "break away" from the rest .

            I don't rate things out of 5/10/100 etc., because poems vary greatly to diffrent readers, and the type of poetry that they are into reading. So all I'll say is great job, but when you put, "I'll circle the Earth which has now become ours" it kind of threw me off and affected that part of the poem, maybe just adding a comma after Earth? '
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              #7    
            Old January 29th, 2005 (7:37 PM).
            Kelsey Kelsey is offline
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              That's what I keep telling everyone. When you read a poem, there is no right or wrong answer as to how you percieve it. It's just what you feel it means. As long as the reader can get their own idea of the poem's meaning, then I'd consider my poem to be a success.

              Now that I re-read it, I think adding a comma after 'Earth' might increase the flow a bit better. Thankies Lance. ^___________^ *huggles*

              ~Kelsey
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                #8    
              Old January 30th, 2005 (6:49 AM).
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                I simply fell in love with your poem!It really reached out to me and gave me a message.Don't worry it's a good message !10/10.
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                  #9    
                Old January 30th, 2005 (7:04 AM).
                Kelsey Kelsey is offline
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                  Awwwwwwwwwwwws, thanks Pokemon Master #1! I'm glad that everyone's been enjoying this poem so far.

                  ~Kelsey
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                    #10    
                  Old January 30th, 2005 (10:22 AM).
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                    i like the idea of the poem, but the "break away" part tends to get repititive, however i am a fan of your work, great job.
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                      #11    
                    Old January 30th, 2005 (10:26 AM).
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                    Great poem, not quite my style but very pokemon-esque. 9/10
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                      #12    
                    Old January 30th, 2005 (10:30 AM).
                    Kelsey Kelsey is offline
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                      Quote:
                      Originally Posted by KLS
                      i like the idea of the poem, but the "break away" part tends to get repititive, however i am a fan of your work, great job.
                      Well, it is supposed to be repetitive. ; I am glad you enjoyed it KLS. ^_________^

                      And thanks jason, I'm glad you enjoyed it too. ^o^

                      ~Kelsey
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                        #13    
                      Old January 30th, 2005 (11:18 AM).
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                        hmm i have to say the 'earth' part is a bit weird but other then that its great kelsey ^__^ 8.5/10... the song that its based on reflects a bad time in my life so... i guess its kind of depressing for me *shrugs* ~origin
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                        Old January 30th, 2005 (11:28 AM).
                        Kelsey Kelsey is offline
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                          ^__________^ Awwws, I'm sowwy this poem brings back not-so-pleasant memories for you, Julia. But, as in any poem, everyone who reads it shall get a different vibe from it. Good or bad. Thank you for taking the time to read it.

                          ~Kelsey
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                            #15    
                          Old February 5th, 2005 (11:28 PM).
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                            Hmm...You took the first and last aragrahs from the song 'Breakaway' by Kelly Clarkson...The middle is quite nice, though
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                            Old February 10th, 2005 (11:25 AM).
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                              `;; Kels, your poems are great! I don't mind taking time out to read them!! It's a pleasure. ~origin
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                              Old February 10th, 2005 (4:38 PM).
                              Kelsey Kelsey is offline
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                                Quote:
                                Originally Posted by Radical_Edward
                                Hmm...You took the first and last aragrahs from the song 'Breakaway' by Kelly Clarkson...The middle is quite nice, though
                                Yuppers, I said in my above post with the poem in it that the song "Break Away" is what I based this peom off of. ^o^

                                Thankies Julia! ^____^ I'm glad you enjoyed it, though this was one of the poems I created when writer's block was setting in. XD

                                ~Kelsey
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                                  #18    
                                Old February 10th, 2005 (5:48 PM).
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                                  I loved it! I love the many things you described to "breakaway". It really emphises your point. =3 I also loved how you used the words breakaway in every paragraph. xD

                                  More! <3
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                                    #19    
                                  Old February 11th, 2005 (2:00 AM).
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                                    I loved it. It made me feel like an eagle. To fly away. Roam in the wide sky. ****, I'm going to write another poem =P

                                    Good going, I don't rate poems on a scale aswell, but it's good anyway
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