The Perfect Murder

Started by FaerieEsqueThing March 9th, 2005 7:00 PM
  • 642 views
  • 4 replies
Age 32
Arlington. Which one? D:
Seen January 2nd, 2011
Posted August 24th, 2009
295 posts
18.4 Years
NOTE: This deals with Homicide and Suicide, it's graphic, so if you're a wimp, back off.

In the cover of the night, a plot is hatched
The perfect murder, so flawless without a catch
I shatter the glass of the house that is no longer a home
But don't worry, I already tested the gun on a lawn gnome

The house is still, I creep silently to the room
Of the victim, sleeping peacfully unaware of their doom
I cock the gun, barely a sound
Before I pull the trigger and send them down

Sweat soaks my hands, but I care not
Long and hard for this moment I have fought
I put pressure on the trigger, set my sights on the mound
Under the covers, sleeping without a sound

BANG.

One shot rings out, blood stains the cover
they may not be dead, I must kill them forever
With a shaking hand I apply more pressure
The death of them is my own treasure

BANG.

Two shots, more blood comes through
In a haze, unaware this is true
One more shot, and the job is done
I must not linger for the rising of the sun

BANG.

They are done, my bloodlust fed
Blood soaks the covers, the matress, the bed
Then I realized what I had done, I prepared to fire
I was a killer, thief of a life, a liar

To my head, I placed the gun
Through the window I could see the sun
I stared ahead and without a second thought
I pulled the trigger and the job was done

For my bloody homicide, I gave my life
For my murder, my crime of spite
My blood soaked into the carpet, forever to stay
On the floor of my victim is where I lay

Raping a person of life and love
I went with them when push came to shove
A tale so tragic it makes many shudder
I'm a victim of my own perfect murder
One does not simply POKEMON into Mordor...




Age 37
Female
South of Heaven, East of Hell, just past Gone Mad Boulevard
Seen July 5th, 2015
Posted August 18th, 2010
2,465 posts
18.5 Years
*Applause* Wicked poem! I loved it so much! I love poems about death especially suicide! Great job ;)
.~Proud Ashaholic~.
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Natsuki

.bluefang.

Age 33
Female
Minnesota
Seen July 16th, 2015
Posted March 22nd, 2012
5,046 posts
18.2 Years
NOTE: This deals with Homicide and Suicide, it's graphic, so if you're a wimp, back off.

In the cover of the night, a plot is hatched
The perfect murder, so flawless without a catch
I shatter the glass of the house that is no longer a home
But don't worry, I already tested the gun on a lawn gnome

The house is still, I creep silently to the room
Of the victim, sleeping peacfully unaware of their doom
I cock the gun, barely a sound
Before I pull the trigger and send them down

Sweat soaks my hands, but I care not
Long and hard for this moment I have fought
I put pressure on the trigger, set my sights on the mound
Under the covers, sleeping without a sound

BANG.

One shot rings out, blood stains the cover
they may not be dead, I must kill them forever
With a shaking hand I apply more pressure
The death of them is my own treasure

BANG.

Two shots, more blood comes through
In a haze, unaware this is true
One more shot, and the job is done
I must not linger for the rising of the sun

BANG.

They are done, my bloodlust fed
Blood soaks the covers, the matress, the bed
Then I realized what I had done, I prepared to fire
I was a killer, thief of a life, a liar

To my head, I placed the gun
Through the window I could see the sun
I stared ahead and without a second thought
I pulled the trigger and the job was done

For my bloody homicide, I gave my life
For my murder, my crime of spite
My blood soaked into the carpet, forever to stay
On the floor of my victim is where I lay

Raping a person of life and love
I went with them when push came to shove
A tale so tragic it makes many shudder
I'm a victim of my own perfect murder
*gives a standing ovation* Wow! This poem was so good, even if the theme is of murder and death, I conclude this poem to be of masterful technique! =D

This poem really shows what might go through a person's mind when taking another's life is the task at hand. They can only think of hate and rage until the job's done. They hear the cries of the lifeless soul and stand there, seemingly oblivious to all that are around them.

Some feel happy, joyous, even, to have committed such a haneous crime. Yet the character in this poem seemed to realize what they had done. They took a life. And what's worse, they took that life when it was in a state where it could not possibly fight back. So the trigger was then placed to their own skull which housed a raging soul of fury and lies.

I only suggest that you use proper punctuation marks. By using commas, periods, etc., the poem is not only more pleasing to look at, but the flow's quality increases as well. ^________^

This poem was so good. <3<3 strongly encourage you to keep writing Ashlein. You have a real gift as a poet. ^.~

~Kelsey