Dance Infernal

Started by Dark Absol v2.0 March 13th, 2005 3:10 PM
  • 582 views
  • 3 replies
Age 32
Illinois..pfft. Boring.
Seen August 9th, 2006
Posted August 8th, 2006
66 posts
18.2 Years
Ok...please don't think I'm crazy. I based it off of a song we are playing in Orchestra. Here goes.

Dance Infernal

Please do not fear me,
trapped in the haunting flame.
I need you near me,
this dance is not a game.

Burn, burn, I must burn..

I can't destroy it
But it will subside.
It shall not hurt you
as long as you are still kind.

This fire will scorch me
for eternity.
This cursed flame lives
Inside my mind.

Burn, burn, I must burn
to escape this calumny.
Burn, burn, I must burn.
Only ashes can set my soul free.

The flames grow hotter
as I spin.
Don't worry now,
it's not the end.

This wretched smoke
blinds my eyes,
and now you've finally realized
that this is how it must be.
This hell is part of me.

Please do not fear me,
trapped in the haunting flame.
I need you near me...
Don't worry.
You aren't to blame.

Eheh..C+C anyone?
Eheheh..yeah. Some of you might know me as Dark Absol on SPP. ^-^;;

If you are a Green Day follower, put this in your sig!
Green Day IS punk so put this in your sig if you agree!

w00t! Go Green Day! xD


I am more than happily paired up with the awesome
Team Magma Girl!

Natsuki

.bluefang.

Age 33
Female
Minnesota
Seen July 16th, 2015
Posted March 22nd, 2012
5,046 posts
18.2 Years
Ooooooh, this one was exciting! ^_____^ Did you really create this poem yourself DA? =D I think it has a good deal of detail in it and it pretty well layed out. ^^

I think the flow is just a bit choppy in some areas. ^^; What you can do to fix that is just read over your poem and see if there are any places that really stick out where they shouldn't. ^^ That way you'll know where to fix any problems and edit some words out etc.

Well, so far so good DA! I hope you write more poems soon, I'd love to see more writings from you. ^__^

~Kelsey
Age 32
Illinois..pfft. Boring.
Seen August 9th, 2006
Posted August 8th, 2006
66 posts
18.2 Years
Hehe..thanks. Yeah, I wrote it all by myself. I also drew a chibi to go with it but...it was really bad. @[email protected];
Eheheh..yeah. Some of you might know me as Dark Absol on SPP. ^-^;;

If you are a Green Day follower, put this in your sig!
Green Day IS punk so put this in your sig if you agree!

w00t! Go Green Day! xD


I am more than happily paired up with the awesome
Team Magma Girl!