~Sins~

Started by Ryoutarou March 24th, 2005 8:56 AM
  • 734 views
  • 4 replies

Ryoutarou

Seen April 2nd, 2023
Posted December 29th, 2020
30,927 posts
19.3 Years
Just some stuff I fixed up from older poems so...yeah XD;

~Sweet Sin~
I'm covered with sin
It's my second skin
Redemption I cannot win
I've got a devil within.

See it when I grin
Love is something thats been
Not something that will be
No not for me, thats when the sin begins.

Life goes from start to fin
I've got a devil within
It sure does like to grin
We all have a twin, of evil we hold in, 'Prickin like a pin.

No reason for life to be
Thats why the twin is me
Thats why I let the devil free
I sure do like to grin
With my blood soaked skin
Making life come to....
Fin.


Reflections From an Ailing Moon of Sin

On a day in winter
Most lethal of the tetrology,
I wasted the time burning cold
Convalescent upon a sickbed,
From mid Decembers morn to mid Decembers night
Lied I there endlessly more pallid,
Moaning from my swollen lips
My breath and soul growing ever more shallow.

In the depths of night
Before the dozen bells,
A caller came to the door
Pulling me through my ailing dream,
He stood cacophonously silent
What sense remained betrayed him cold as I,
Twas no witness of Jehovah
Nor a peddler of delights,
But a dark cloaked and gaunt formed man
With visage kept to shadow.

He thrust forth his hand
A sickly member wholly skeletal and frail,
As he moved his robe ripped from nights sky shifted
His tarnish scythe blade flickered like a sickly crescent moon,
The silken hood he wore shuffled without a sound
And he croaked to me that I should come,
I stiffened slowly in a minute that lasted a million years,
Took his hand and winced with sudden chill.

The street and houses were fully gone
Each fence and yapping hound burned away,
I stood instead on a dismal plain,
Sown with withered grass,
The dark-cloaked spectre beckoned me
Bid me take his well-worn path,
We walked upon a sullen road, and kept to a sluggish pace.

With but an hours passing stood we at the end
No longer on the blighted earth but within a pallid void,
Two stone faces adrift before us
Both the same in ends and means,
Each bore a face, baroquely carved from rock,
One a grinning devil and the other a frowning god,
In each face was uniformly set,
A gaping maw of endless black,

The gasping thing that brought me turned and harshly spoke
Said that I may enter either and that neither offered peace.
In this I falsly gained mad assurance
Basking the colorless gloaming of my penultimate thought,
Closed my eyes and held my fruitless breath,
Paid no heed my straining form or spirit,
My arm stretched forward not shaking nor afraid, with a false peace it reached out.
And lo, I was gone.

Natsuki

.bluefang.

Age 33
Female
Minnesota
Seen July 16th, 2015
Posted March 22nd, 2012
5,046 posts
18.2 Years
OMGoodness... o.o I actually never knew you could write to good Bunn-Bunn. XD *clings* OK, sins, eh? Quite an interesting topic. ^^ It makes you wonder about sins and what action is acutally to be considered a sin. o.O Wow, I confuzzled myself there. XD

*ahem* Anyways, both poems you have here are wonderful. ^^ They give the reader an inquisitive feeling. You can't help but think about the sins you've committed in the past and yet you hope to take action to not cover them up, but to set them free and let your soul rest once more. <3

Sweet job Bunny! =D *stamps "Kelsey Seal of Approval" on Bunny's poems* <3

~Kelsey

Ryoutarou

Seen April 2nd, 2023
Posted December 29th, 2020
30,927 posts
19.3 Years
Thanks ^^ Actually, the first one was more about someone forgetting their humanity by letting go into sin. It's showing how a material item (the grin) can make someone suffer.

The second one was a bit more complicated...Um, at first it started out about a man about to die looking back on his life. Then I changed it a bit to add in how sinning throughout his life had made him less of a man then he had hopped to be. He was 'sorta not ready to die as he had yet to find himself redemtion for his sings. It also shows that death doesn't wait for anyone, so best for one to do the most with their days while they still have the chance to.

Or...Something like that XD;

KLS

PC's Eternal Witness

Age 32
patiently waiting for zappy to come back
Seen November 7th, 2005
Posted August 4th, 2005
1,397 posts
19.7 Years
you know just because it's poetry, doesn't mean that you need to make it rhyme after every line, XD (though I did find it enjoyable to read). This was a decent poem for me, and not excellent just because I prefer short poems over long poems (yes, I hate long poems) because I think poetry should be expressed with as few words as possible and you paint a picture on the reader's head. Anyways, enough about me ranting.

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