How healthy is your relationship with your parents?

Started by Sirfetch’d June 12th, 2016 1:13 PM
  • 2431 views
  • 42 replies

Ho-Oh

used Sacred Fire!

Age 31
Female
QLD, Australia
Seen June 5th, 2022
Posted April 23rd, 2022
35,988 posts
17.5 Years
Nope. Never lived with my mother nor my father.

My mother refuses to give me her birth certificate so if I ever needed a passport, bad luck. She also sends me 'cute' gifs that idgaf about and I completely ignore. She claims to all her friends how great I am etc but never took the time to get to know me and if she sends me anything it's nothing I'd ever use. She doesn't bother and claims to be a wonderful mother when all she did was give birth to me. She didn't even carry me properly because now I have eye problems from her drug use while being pregnant with me. She's self centered and has been muk to my half brothers too (also never lived with). As far as I'm concerned she doesn't really exist. If she made an effort sure, but nope.

My dad doesn't claim to be an amazing dad nor does he talk to me much. That's fine by me, only time he talks is when our sports teams play which is great. That's all I need. Not some fake gif giving woman.

As for those who raised me, Nan and Pop. They're incredible and wonderful and amazing. We used to fight a lot when I lived with them but distance helps so now our relationship has improved. Both honestly deserve awards from the muk they put up with from family. I pretty much dislike my aunty and mother for that reason.

Sothis

Will this hand destroy you?

She/her
Firene
Seen 11 Hours Ago
Posted 14 Hours Ago
17,837 posts
9.9 Years
Mother
I love my mommy. She's been there for me my whole life and has always helped me and accepted me. I'm so grateful to have a mother like her

Father
I don't live near him lol, but we keep up on facebook and we get along well. He was an alcoholic most my life but since retiring has been doing better.

Step father
Live with him and mom, he tries his hardest but is kinda bigoted.

Step mom
She's nice, never really talk to her much. She's an animal lover.

you cannot hope to win
so bound in flesh


Belinda

Age 28
Female
Seen March 4th, 2018
Posted November 13th, 2017
2,211 posts
14.8 Years
My mother: We've had our differences and still do, admittingly she could have raised me better, but she said she tried her best so that's what counts really. I love her, but I still can't forgive her for certain things she did during my childhood. I still live with her, and I think she likes it that way. But I don't want to live with her forever. Our relationship is mostly stable.

My father: Barely there during my childhood, was an alcoholic, he only helped my mother financially that's about it. He tries to have a relationship with me today but I refuse to have one with him. Used to be closer when I was younger which I hate to admit, but I always spent time with my cousins next door instead of staying in his house anyways. Alot of his actions over the years have proved to me how ugly of a human being he is. I want to cut him off as soon as possible but he doesn't give me the damn chance.

Stepmom: I have one, my dad never told me about her until she came here to the USA to visit years ago. I've seen her once or twice, but I always got such bad vibes and an attitude from her so I don't even bother. Therefore we don't have a relationship. That's about it.

Cordeline

7th Horizon: Märchen

Age 19
Female
Seen November 12th, 2021
Posted September 13th, 2018
231 posts
7 Years
My mom is really sweet and she has always been kind to me. Of course she scolds me too when she needs to and will be strict for the most part. But she is more understanding of the things that go on in my life more than any other family member... I got into classical music mostly because of her and became interested in musical instruments thanks to her. She owns a small café and I can reserve the top floor for myself and my friends if I want to celebrate anything. If I do something bad within reason and tell her, she is likely to tell my dad to be lenient with my punish... Thankfully I don't do things that would get me punished often x_X. My mom is also the only person to whom I told uhm, secrets, that would make my brothers make fun of me and my dad probably throw a fit. I love my mom is barely expressing what I really feel for her.

My dad is... Well, much more strict and distant, but deep within he is very soft hahaha. He is very strict about me getting good grades so he unfortunately scolds me a lot regarding that x_X. He can be really scary, but he has helped me everytime I have asked him for help. If I have homework I don't understand and my brother's and mom can't help me, I can ask my dad and he will explain me things. He usually starts really calm but I'm so dumb he starts losing his patience really quickly >.<. Still, in the end, after every homework session I have with him, I end up understanding it very well. he is the one who gifted me my first smartphone so I'm really thankful to him. I think he just has troubles expressing his true feelings about us so he usually spoils up a little... I used to play a lot with him when I was little, so in the end, he is a dad, and I love him very much and am thankful for everything he does for me and the rest of the family. He lets me use his credit card with permission when I want to buy digital things like music and I will always try to pay him back with my allowance. He didn't use me to trust me for anything like ever, but as soon as I turned 13 he started loosening up. I couldn't even go to the shopping district with my friends unless we were accompanied by an adult. My mom eventually convinced him that I should be old enough to do that stuff... When I told the story of the first time I was asked by a boy, you could tell he wanted to yell but he didn't. It's hard to see him laugh but when you do it's the best thing ^-^.

starseed galaxy auticorn

PC's Resident Auticorn

Age 34
she/he/they
the land of magical unicorns
Seen 1 Week Ago
Posted 1 Week Ago
6,648 posts
18.9 Years
It's... fair. I mean, I have good times and bad times with them. There are some moments where they don't get my special needs. If I have meltdowns or outbursts, they usually fuel them and make them worse than they should as well. I mean, I have to have a fairly good relationship with them, considering I live with them.

To be honest though, I do have a pretty close relationship with my dad. I can tell him things I could never tell my mom. Mostly, because mom will take it wrong or not understand them as well. Like, I've told him about being bisexual at one point and about sensing his brother Larry (my uncle) once. He told me that he died when I was still very young as well. He understands things I tell him. He also spoils me a lot, but that's because he grew up really dirt poor. So, he wants me to have the things he didn't get to have. To be fair, I'm not one of those tantrum throwing adult kids who screams every time they don't get what they want. DX

My mom is more like a sister. We have our days when we can get along. The problem with her is that she LOVES to rattata. She'll rattata about my dad or about some other random thing. It annoys me so much. I often have to scream at her to stop, and she hardly ever does at times. It's just so stressful because she's also the main trigger for my outbursts as well. She'll always interrupt me if I'm in the middle of something then rattata because I'm 'always busy'. She doesn't really understand my special needs, yet she can tell others I have them. She'll even get upset if someone gives me weird looks because of my animal hats. I always have to tell her that I could careless about it. She has 'issues' of her own, so maybe that's why we get along that way.

Khoshi

とてもかわいい!

Age 24
Male
Sydney, Australia
Seen January 3rd, 2020
Posted October 16th, 2019
2,646 posts
10.1 Years
I can say pretty good, though both of my parents are now getting pretty old, so I've been demoted from "child" to "caretaker". Mum's a diabetic and she doesn't manage it very well at all, so I have to remind her constantly to check on her blood. She's also broken her foot recently, so I keep telling her to keep her foot still. Her and I don't share anything in common, and the same is sort of with my father, but I can at least discuss world issues with him without much issue. Both are rather stressful when it comes to study. Not much else I can say about them, unfortunately. Well, there's the fact that we've had no major problems whatsoever since my father quit drinking. Ever since he quit, everything's been sunny.

Dracowyn

Hell's Traffic Accident

Age 30
Male
Phondrasôn
Seen September 9th, 2022
Posted March 5th, 2022
413 posts
12.2 Years
I have a really good relationship with my mom. She's always been there for me and I can talk to her about pretty much everything. We also share a lot of interests and she's a really great mom.

My dad's another case. I really don't have a good relationship with me. Don't get me wrong, he always tried to take care of me and my sis, but ever since he cheated on my mom I could never really forgive him. He also rants about stupid little nitpicky things a lot and he's well, not the most intelligent person nor is he interested in anything. No passions, no hobbies, no nothing.

He really doesn't know much about me either. He probably only knows 3 of my friends by name too. Idk, I feel like I'm a stranger to my own dad even though I still live with my parents.

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gimmepie

Age 27
Male
Australia
Seen 1 Day Ago
Posted 1 Day Ago
I'm really close with my mum, we don't always agree and there's certainly things that I still haven't forgiven her but despite that I have a very deep respect for her and I'm extremely grateful for how much she looks out for me. We get along extremely well and share a lot of similar perspectives on things and interests.

My Dad on the other hand I despised as a child. These days we're on cordial terms and talk on the phone occasionally but I haven't seen him in years and I'm honestly not particularly bothered by that.
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Limey-chan

Batzu

He/Him
Mt Moon
Seen May 27th, 2021
Posted October 31st, 2020
2,523 posts
14.2 Years
Eh, my relationship is better than it was, but honestly, it's still not as healthy as it should be.

I was going to type out this long, drawn-out reply as to the reasons we don't get along very well, but a lot of it was super personal and tbh, it ended up being a bit ranty. Long story short, a lot of stuff went on in the past that i'm not proud of, that I feel like my parents still hold a grudge about. But hey, at least we're all on speaking terms now.

Paired with Pigu

Her

Age 29
Seen 3 Hours Ago
Posted 1 Week Ago
father: nope!

mother: we coexist, I guess. I'm not particularly fussed about my relationship with her bar natural day-to-day interactions. If they're positive then I guess that's a plus. Too much to forgive and forget for me to try doing so at this point in time.

Return

You can make to the sunrise....

Male
India
Seen May 7th, 2021
Posted May 3rd, 2018
1,449 posts
10 Years
Mother: I can talk to her about virtually everything that bothers me. She has been always there for me through some very tough times. We also sometimes argues, but still at last she understand my problem and so I have a really good relationship with my mom.

Father: We don't interact much, he get angry very easily for even very small talks, which annoys me.

Sanguine

malignant narcissist

Female
in front of my TV
Seen April 7th, 2019
Posted January 1st, 2019
535 posts
10 Years
My relationship with both parents used to be non-existent due to my stepfather's actions in the past. He was a piece of muk to myself and my sisters, and my mother turned a blind eye to it all, which ended up with me hating the both of them.

Ever since he left the picture though, my mother's tried to reconnect with me which I'm grateful for. We can actually have conversations, go shopping etc. and I'm glad that I can be on friendly terms with her nowadays.

I don't think I'll ever have a relationship with my biological father - he isn't fond of my sexuality and has no problem telling me that whenever I see him. I'm learning to love myself for who I am and I just don't need that negativity in my life anymore.
[00:18] +oocyst: sang is too pure

Bay

She/They
Dani California
Seen 3 Hours Ago
Posted 3 Hours Ago
6,347 posts
17 Years
I think my relationship with both of my parents are fair. Even though they had said some hurtful things that I'll never forget and things we don't agree on, they've done a lot for me and I'm grateful for that. My dad and I share some common tastes in video games, music, and tv shows, and also I can easily joke with him more. He has a short temper, though, so I often find myself talking personal things to my mother more.
Miles Edgeworth
Foul Play [On Hiatus]

Margot

some things are that simple

they/he
Seen April 16th, 2022
Posted February 25th, 2019
3,662 posts
17.3 Years
Bah, it's complicated, but ever since my Dad went sober and since I've moved out, our relationship is the best it has ever been. Doesn't mean it's always perfect, but it's more healthy and that's a good thing.

Spoiler:
Dad: He had a pretty terrible relationship with alcohol when I was younger and finally went sober at the end of my junior year of high school. He was mean and scary and not the guy I know as my father when he drank. I was constantly tense in my house & spent a lot of time counting beer bottles to figure out if I could talk to him. It sucked. But now he's in a much better place and I love talking to him; we share a lot of interests and he's so kind and supportive and has a great/corny sense of humor that I love. When we fight, it's bad, but like me he's one to apologize first and put the issue to rest.

Mom: Oh boy, we couldn't go a day without screaming at each other when I was growing up. We never saw eye to eye on anything and my mother is ridiculously stubborn to a fault. While my dad was fighting alcoholism, I think she got really depressed and was kinda absent? At least emotionally. I feel like my brother and I raised ourselves and shaped our own morals because of it. Then once my dad went sober my mom went and got SUPER involved in everything which was weird since I already felt so independent. She didn't know any of my anxieties or issues and just steam rolled over them constantly. It made things tense. Things are still tense. But she's a really loving and nice person and I'm trying really hard not to react so quickly when she makes me mad. She's quick to criticize, and I, unfortunately, am just as quick to snap back.


At the end of the day, they're good people who have had some nasty things to deal with in life and even though things weren't always great, they're good people who I love very much. They do want the best for my brother and I, and we want the best for them.

smocks

fiat lux

Female
California
Seen March 25th, 2019
Posted March 10th, 2019
To be honest, I have a good relationship with both of my parents but their relationship is kinda messed up...
When I was younger, both of them would talk smack about each other when I was alone with either of them, they're both stubborn and hot-headed people & both shared the same business & with all their business drama, I understand their actions.
But both of my parents have not been a huge part of my life sadly, they're always traveling or at work cause of their business. They both love my sister and I very much and I return the love back to them, but I wish it could be greater ya know. I do love them its just, idk, it should be stronger because they are my parents & they both very hard to give my sister and I a great life.

Omicron

the day was mine

Alternia
Seen December 1st, 2022
Posted October 18th, 2022
4,422 posts
13.2 Years
I have a really good, healthy relationship with my parents. We went through a lot because of my health problems but that only brought us closer. It is great, honestly.

and i will love to see that day
that day is mine
when she will marry me outside with the willow trees

Sun

When the sun goes down...

Male
Seen January 20th, 2017
Posted January 2nd, 2017
4,705 posts
9.7 Years
On a scale from 0-10, it's definitely lower than zero for both.

I get along with my stepmother and young half-sister well, not to mention they saved my life before.
Leaving PC completely

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Non-binary
Seen July 16th, 2016
Posted July 16th, 2016
125 posts
6.9 Years
I have a very close relationship with both my Mom and my Dad and it is very healthy. For being a young teen they trust me and I don't plan on disappointing them and losing that trust. Of course my teenage brain makes stupid judgement calls, but my parents never lay into me they just sit me down and talk it out and leave it as a life lesson learned. I have learned a ton from both of them. We also have fun times going places together also with my big sister.

Genegerbread

Pokemon Argent Tear Storywriter

Male
'Murica
Seen December 21st, 2020
Posted November 25th, 2016
25 posts
6.9 Years
I think my relationship with my mother and father are actually very good, especially me being fourteen.

My mother is a very nice person, don't get me wrong, but when she gets upset, she'll get really upset. Of course, as I've become older and understood the concepts of responsibility and being appropriate much better, she hasn't really gotten as upset. Also, I absolutely hate it when she always comments on 'how tall I've grown' or 'my broad shoulders'. Frankly, I do have broad shoulders because of my dad, and I'm about 5'8, but it still annoys me. When she was a child, her parents abused her, and I only found out in 2014 when my parents and her parents had a huge argument. They called my father some slang for someone who was from the deep south and stupid (because he was born in Mississippi), and they called me on my birthday, crying and telling me that my mother had issues, which she obviously didn't. I love my mother a lot.

My father is a big teddy bear. He's about 6'2 and he's really strong, so he can be intimidating, but he makes a ton of really good jokes and we sometimes look at each other and kind of smirk when my mom says or does something annoying or funny. He was in the army for thirty years, so I know plenty of tricks, and he's just like the Brigadier General he retired as. He can be very strict, and you shouldn't underestimate him, but I love him a ton.

I'm usually a straight-A student, my lowest grade in all of middle school being an 85 (in a high school Biology class) and my second lowest being a 90. They usually reward me because of my accomplishments. I'm thankful to live with the family I have. One thing I like is that I am a very persuasive person. I never really whine about anything, but I actually write essays to get my parents to temporarily help pay for a server or something until I start earning a sufficient amount of money at a constant rate.
I'm fourteen, I like Pokemon, I play PC games and go to school, and my life consumes itself every single day that it lives.

Alex

what will it be next?

Seen December 30th, 2022
Posted December 26th, 2022
6,407 posts
16.4 Years
My parents have done so much for me and I am so grateful to them. But only recently has it started to show.

My mom and I get along really well, she loves to talk to me all about my personal problems and wants only for my life to improve so it's nice knowing somebody out there cares. My dad and I used to almost never agree but now I get along with him pretty well, we have a very similar sense of humour as it turns out so we can make each other laugh.

pastelspectre

Memento Mori

Age 25
he/him
The Pacific Northwest
Seen 1 Week Ago
Posted 1 Week Ago
2,156 posts
13.1 Years
My mom: I am close to her. Not as close as she'd like me to be, but I have my reasons for that. She is extremely supportive though in a lot of my choices and my sexuality and my mental issues (as in she helps me get through them and whatnot) but she does belittle me a lot as well is that makes sense..with my independence and how I act bc I act more like a child sometimes than 18 (like with toys and stuff) but she's still my mom and I like to think we're close.

My dad: My dad is a different story, though. He did a lot of bad things to my mom (such as abuse, mental, emotional and sometimes physical) and even though they're divorced now and it was 3 years ago or so that they got divorced and the abuse finally ended, I still haven't forgiven him for what he's done. My mom somehow has which..I dunno how, but she did..I think my dad knows I don't like him so he tries his best to communicate with me and be a good father but I still haven't forgiven him for what he's done. Maybe someday I can forgive him but as for now, our relationship is very strained and one-sided.