Stupid Criminals

Started by John Denver July 3rd, 2005 11:22 AM
  • 802 views
  • 22 replies
Age 35
War n' stuff
Seen October 2nd, 2006
Posted May 14th, 2006
8,290 posts
19.7 Years
This one man came to a bank and he had a gun with him. He walked up to the counter and handed the clerk a piece of paper that said "give me all the money you got." The clerk looked at the paper and handed it back to him and said "Sorry, but if you want to withdrawl money or steal any money you'll have to go to the next counter."

The guy was so confused he just left. The cops found him and arrested him later.

RETARDED!!

Have you guys ever heard some stupid criminal stories?
Age 35
Raping the virgin Mary...
Seen June 22nd, 2009
Posted March 26th, 2006
1,808 posts
18.7 Years
This one man came to a bank and he had a gun with him. He walked up to the counter and handed the clerk a piece of paper that said "give me all the money you got." The clerk looked at the paper and handed it back to him and said "Sorry, but if you want to withdrawl money or steal any money you'll have to go to the next counter."

The guy was so confused he just left. The cops found him and arrested him later.

RETARDED!!

Have you guys ever heard some stupid criminal stories?
WTF!?

Is that a real story??
That wasn't me...! Really! *brain freezes*

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There's another one... XD

Linoone

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Age 33
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Seen February 3rd, 2008
Posted September 9th, 2007
1,178 posts
18 Years
I heard that a bank robber was trying to pull the main door, until they caught him, then a lady pushed the door with no effort, now THAT's being stupid

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Age 34
Female
United Kingdom, Wales
Seen March 1st, 2016
Posted April 6th, 2012
2,527 posts
18.2 Years
I heard of this one guy...or rather saw (Americas dumbest criminals allways comes in handy) come into a back, with ice cream covering his face, he cued up in line and when he got to the front of the cue, he demanded the money...but the ice cream had melted and the CCTV camera had a perfect view of the mans face...he was arested leater that day XD

God I love these guy's...they just make me laugh.

Chiru

I dun use this account any mo'

Age 31
Seen May 30th, 2013
Posted June 27th, 2007
1,228 posts
17.9 Years
I heard a story about a guy who snuck into a store at night with a bag over his head so no one could use the survellience camera to identify him. The only problem was he forgot to cut eye holes in the bag so he couldn't see a thing XDDD! The camera showed him bumping into everything!
He finally made it out of the store and later came back with eye holes in the bag and a flashlight. However, he was wearing a military uniform and they used that to identify him o_O
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Age 33
A little place called Earth!
Seen December 7th, 2013
Posted September 10th, 2009
2,904 posts
18.6 Years
This heapened two night's ago about 500 meters from my house. A guy entered a metalic hardware store... But he got there too late and the cash was allready in the house, so he told the shopkeeper to fill the bag with the most expensive stuff he had. And when the shopkeeper finished the robber tried to take up the bag but he couldn't so he pulled it from the shop. The shopkeeper called the police and they found him about 200 meters from the shop in the middle of the street resting from all that heavy pulling.
Age 33
USA
Seen October 29th, 2006
Posted July 16th, 2006
1,152 posts
17.9 Years
I highly doubt this is a real story but I was in the commmons room at my High School sitting around while half of the school slept snug in their beds and another portion were testing and I was in this group of people talking about random things. Criminals came up and a guy mentioned people got away with robbery by using magic markers.


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Eon-Rider

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Age 29
Male
Sydney
Seen July 5th, 2011
Posted March 31st, 2011
7,498 posts
18.5 Years
I've got a whole book on them.

There was someone who bought a lottery ticket and thought that she had not one anything so she tried to cheat by using a pen and turning the certain number into a different number. but she was caught doing that and was arrested. Later on, the police found out that her original numbers actually would have won her $20,000!
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Cherrim

Age 34
she / her
Toronto
Seen 20 Hours Ago
Posted 20 Hours Ago
33,052 posts
20.4 Years
Here's My Name and Address Now Hand Over the Cash

LAS VEGAS (AP) A man accused of holding up a pizza parlor left behind a job application with his real name and address, authorities said.

"I would chalk it up to either inexperience or plain stupidity," Clark County prosecutor Frank Coumou told the Las Vegas Review-Journal for a Wednesday report.

Alejandro Martinez, 23, of Las Vegas, was being held Wednesday at the Clark County jail pending a Monday appearance in Clark County District Court (search). He faces felony burglary and robbery with a weapon charges in the May 25 heist.

Authorities said Martinez ordered a pizza and started filling out the application before displaying a gun and demanding money. The clerk handed over $200.

Outside, a witness wrote down the license plate number of a getaway car, leading police to Martinez' home.

Martinez' lawyer, Deputy Public Defender James Ruggeroli, said authorities have the wrong man. He said the pizza shop clerk couldn't identify Martinez as the robber, and the job application was not presented as evidence at a preliminary hearing.
[size=http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,160390,00.html]Source.[/url]
o_O Some people might recognize that from that thread Allstories posted. If you scroll down the page from the news link he posted, you see that article.

I think that's the best criminal ever. X3


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22sa

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Male
Canada
Seen January 11th, 2023
Posted November 9th, 2022
8,421 posts
19.7 Years
This one man came to a bank and he had a gun with him. He walked up to the counter and handed the clerk a piece of paper that said "give me all the money you got." The clerk looked at the paper and handed it back to him and said "Sorry, but if you want to withdrawl money or steal any money you'll have to go to the next counter."

The guy was so confused he just left. The cops found him and arrested him later.

RETARDED!!

Have you guys ever heard some stupid criminal stories?
Maybe he was just desperate. That's obviously unprofessional theft activity. :\

Anyways, I've not met idiot theives--they all succeeded one way or another. :D

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Kylie-chan

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Age 29
Non-binary
New South Wales, Australia
Seen December 3rd, 2022
Posted October 5th, 2016
14,976 posts
18.7 Years
o_O Some people might recognize that from that thread Allstories posted. If you scroll down the page from the news link he posted, you see that article.

I think that's the best criminal ever. X3
I recognise it, it was hilarious. I give it the Muffin Medal for Idiocy in Illicit Incidents. XD
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あの交差点で皆がもしスキップをして もしあの町の真中でてを繋いで空を見上げたら
Age 36
Sitting upon the hills waiting for the one...
Seen June 14th, 2006
Posted June 14th, 2006
5,154 posts
18 Years
There was onecriminal whom used a comb as a 'weapon' to rob two store clerks. However, by the time the fottage had ended (saw it on tv) he was being harrased by the two clerks. He was even smashed in the head with a vodka bottle. I was enjoying it very much...soe criminals are complete nimrods...


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Age 31
I'm everywhere. Believe it.
Seen November 30th, 2011
Posted November 30th, 2011
7,912 posts
18.6 Years
I saw once on tv, this guy put a paper bag on his head, walked into the store, with a banana in his coat, went up to the counter and told the clert to give him all the money in the store. The clert said, "I'm sorry sir, but we don't accept fake guns or paper bags in exchange." XD
Seen July 7th, 2008
Posted April 5th, 2006
2,943 posts
19.7 Years
crap like that fudging crack me up.

But its what others do that is even more stupid.

There was this wal-mart where a guy had his truck stolen, and the people at wal-mart never reported it until the next day. Turns out when the cops looked at the surveilance tape the next day, the criminals had returned to get their own car back =/

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Age 29
Non-binary
New South Wales, Australia
Seen December 3rd, 2022
Posted October 5th, 2016
14,976 posts
18.7 Years
A guy tried entered my house with a knife and asked me to give him all the thing I got. I threw a chair on him and called the police.
Is that true? O_o; Well, I don't think he's stupid, you're just brave if you didn't chuck a wobbly like I would have.
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あの交差点で皆がもしスキップをして もしあの町の真中でてを繋いで空を見上げたら
Age 32
Australia
Seen January 29th, 2014
Posted October 2nd, 2007
688 posts
18 Years
*laughs loudly* I always laugh to read some of those weird crime stories. I get some of these weird crime stories in one of the magazines I buy every week. I shall type up a few of them.

An armed robber who held up a petrol station in the US returned to the scene of his crime to ask for directions.
The knife-wielding thief made off with a bag of cash, but was hotly pursued by sererval police cars. During the 160km/h chase, the man lost police through winding back roads - but also found himself lost.
So he pulled into a petrol station to ask for directions - and it just happened to be the one he had fled from. He was arrested soon after.

----------------------------------------------------------

A Canadian policeman did a double-take when he arrested the same teen twice for speeding within hours. Constable Chris Legere was somewhat miffed that his first warning to the 18-year-old woman wasn't heeded when he pulled her over for a second time. But it wasn't until he checked the driver's ID that he realised it was the girl's twin sister.

By the way, the second one isn't really a crime.... but I found it funny so that's why I decided to post it on here anyway.
Seen July 13th, 2013
Posted March 10th, 2007
234 posts
18.2 Years
There was this story of a guy who wanted to sign up to work at a pizza place. He had to write down all of his personal information and give it to the pizza place.
Then, he went out. Then, he came in again and told everybody to freeze and all that stuff. He stole some money and things and he left. But, he forgot all his personal information! The info had his address, phone #, etc.! They arrested him at his house!
Pumping the Pumpkings
Seen December 16th, 2005
Posted December 16th, 2005
31 posts
17.9 Years
Is that true? O_o; Well, I don't think he's stupid, you're just brave if you didn't chuck a wobbly like I would have.
Well, after that, the cops called the ambulance, because the chair hit his head... Im retarded :P



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