your temper

Started by Sheep August 22nd, 2020 5:43 AM
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  • 18 replies

Sheep

She/Her
Australia
Seen 2 Hours Ago
Posted 4 Hours Ago
39,253 posts
16.6 Years
How is your temper? Are you quiet, or prone to yelling? Have you ever yelled at others without meaning to before? How do you work to control your temper?

My mom relieves stress by yelling, and for her yelling specifically at people is what often makes her feel better. She’s been working hard not to do it much anymore though but it can still happen, and she always feels bad afterwards :( does anyone else have family like this?

gimmepie

Age 27
Male
Australia
Seen 1 Day Ago
Posted 1 Day Ago
My temper is weird, some things don't get to me at all. The things that do get to me though, it's kind of an instant switch from 1-11. I'm not really that good at shaking it off either, sometimes ranting helps but yeah.
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Age 36
IDK! Sorry!
Infinite Insanity
Seen 1 Day Ago
Posted 1 Week Ago
1,164 posts
6.3 Years
My temper is horrible. I get anxiety so easily that I get angry, and then my brain suppresses the bad behavior so it's like I forgot what I done. It's been horrible to live with really. People have called me "rude" with my temper for years and to this day, i'm still figuring out why. :(

Lunar

Age 24
Male
England
Seen September 16th, 2020
Posted September 15th, 2020
I'm a really chilled person and really rarely get angry, but as soon as I get in a competitive situation like whenever I play football my temper takes on a whole new level haha, especially whenever the referees make some bad decisions!

VisionofMilotic

Female
Sootopolis City
Seen 10 Hours Ago
Posted 3 Days Ago
I am good-tempered. Generally I am understanding that we all make mistakes, and I am patient if I am inconvenienced. If anything I'm more likely to try to cajole others and help them calm down if it looks like they're getting defensive or upset or they're raising their voice.

I do have limits though. Fairness and truth are very important to me, so if I feel someone is being unappreciative then that can irritate or anger me. Things like guilt-tripping me over not loaning you money this time, complaining that I didn't return a call fast enough or just barging into my house without asking permission would not be cool with me. I tend to be giving, but nobody is entitled to your time, energy and resources. This may not be so much a temper as just having some boundaries.

I try my best to be sensitive to others feelings, so it's not my default to be aggressive and shout, but I'm also going to respond to the vibes you send out. If you are rude, condescending, derogatory and really forceful then all bets are off. I'm not going to let someone just have your way and run over me or others. I don't respect people who bully others, nor do I respect not standing up for yourself.

I wouldn't answer the question if I am quiet with a yes, because I can be very talkative and detail-oriented, especially when I am in the company of people I have known for a long time and/or really like. But I am soft-spoken in the way that I communicate, rather than loud if that is what is meant by quiet. It's not like saying something at a higher volume makes it somehow more substantive. I am not sure if it always translates online because tone is easy to misread, but people who speak with me in person or over the phone at least say that I have a soothing voice, and seem unruffled. I am collected usually, even when it's an emotional discussion.

Yelling at somebody would not help me relieve stress, it would probably cause me to feel more stressed. People who seem full of anger or who lash out quickly and/or inappropriately are not compatible with me. I notice when people sound loud and shrill, and usually it makes me uncomfortable, and I put some distance between that soul and me. It should go without saying that any kind of physical violence to demonstrate your feelings I consider completely unacceptable and abusive, especially when it's directed at our most vulnerable like children, the elderly or animals.

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Nah

Age 30
she/her, they/them
Seen 10 Hours Ago
Posted 18 Hours Ago
15,643 posts
9.5 Years
I'm admittedly not quite as completely chill as I'd like to be, but at the very least for a long time I've not been the sort to get angry at other people.

Yelling is not something I do either. Really I just don't like raising my voice in any manner whatsoever for literally any reason at all (when I get excited, so someone can hear me, etc) and kinda hate when it does happen.

Both my parents though have always had short fuses. My dad's gotten slightly better about it lately, but, y'know, only slightly.
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Aslan

she/her
Seen 1 Day Ago
Posted 2 Days Ago
3,108 posts
10.2 Years
I also come from a family where my dad has always been quick to get angry almost immediately over the smallest issues. I told myself I never wanted to be like that and since then I've had good control of my temper. I think I'd regret saying half the things I think when I'm angry so I keep it to myself and I'm definitely the type to go very silent when I'm in a bad mood. I tend to just shut people out rather than lose my temper. But I try not to let anything get to me and have that power over me. Normally I very rarely lose my temper openly unless someone says something incredibly insensitive about other people. In that circumstance you can bet I will come for you if you're being an insensitive prick :)

Sammi

Age 33
she/her
The States
Seen 23 Hours Ago
Posted November 8th, 2021
14,085 posts
18.3 Years
I'm generally pretty chill. I think I could count the times I've actually yelled in anger on one hand. That said, I do have anxiety, so I can accidentally get snappy when I'm worked up. Mercifully the people I know are okay with it and I'm pretty quick to apologize.

I don't really need to do much to control my temper, because very few things get me legitimately angry.

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Memento Mori

Age 25
he/him
The Pacific Northwest
Seen 1 Week Ago
Posted 1 Week Ago
2,156 posts
13.1 Years
I get irritated kind of easily, but it takes me a lot to get me genuinely angry. Most people don’t take me seriously when I get angry due to my short size. But whenever I do get genuinely angry or sometimes really irritated, I admittedly do some things I shouldn’t do in the moment like slam doors or other things. I think I’ve gotten better about it though, or I’m trying to be at least.

TrainerJacob

Age 29
Male
Rome, Georgia, USA
Seen 5 Days Ago
Posted 1 Week Ago
136 posts
10.2 Years
Well, I can get pretty angry if people say things I disagree with or if they do something I don't like. Before I went on my anxiety medicine, I would bang my head, scream, and say things I didn't mean.
Now, since I'm on medicine for my anxiety, I haven't had many breakdowns or anything like that.

Fairy

she / they
in the flowers
Seen January 27th, 2023
Posted January 6th, 2023
Unfortunately I think I might be one of those "I'm not angry, just disappointed" types, ugh.

I very rarely get angry. And if I am angry you'll seldom know it. And if you do know that I'm angry, I most certainly wouldn't yell or treat you like I am. The only things that I truly hate and really get on my nerves are generally things about myself, haha. Though I like being a hyperbolic rattata and playing up like I'm angry, the emotion never really makes a home in my brain. It's like its hard for me to conjure up the energy when so much of my emotional capacity goes into feeling anxious, does that make sense?
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Roni

Age 24
he/him
Philippines
Seen 4 Days Ago
Posted 4 Days Ago
19,088 posts
10.1 Years
I get irate pretty easily. I've continually been practicing techniques to calm myself down faster and try to avoid things that trigger me. I guess it's a genetic thing, along with my upbringing from parents who were the same. Unfortunate really, as my goal in life is to be the chill guy who handles every sort of pressure with calm and poise.
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Age 23
Male
Seen 3 Weeks Ago
Posted October 4th, 2022
307 posts
3.8 Years
I have pretty control over my emotions and rarely get angry, or at the very least, I do not show that I'm angry. There are some specific things that will get me riled up, but I don't think I have been properly angry for the last like... 4 or 5 years?
I might raise my voice when playing games with friends, but it's all a part of the experience of gaming with friends if you ask me.
Male
Canada
Seen January 7th, 2023
Posted January 7th, 2023
379 posts
2.9 Years
I Don't yell very much, but i can get angry easily.
I don't know, really. It takes a lot for me to get really angry at other people (if I get angry with you it's either a good sign because I care enough to get angry, or it's a very bad sign because you've stepped on a landmine) but it doesn't take much to irritate me. I seem to always be irritated about something or other.

I have an Achilles' Heel, though - technology. The second something stops working the way it should, or a video game cheats (i.e. RNG screws me over royally), or anything goes wrong...there I go. I relieve stress by swearing generally. It actually does help most of the time, as it focuses me on what I need to do to fix it. I could probably do it internally, but there's something very satisfying about inventing new swear words (and reusing the old ones) and giving substance to my annoyance.

ZeoStar

Seen 3 Hours Ago
Posted 15 Hours Ago
11,403 posts
5.6 Years
Non existent. I'm pretty stoic. It takes a bit to get an emotional reaction out of me, but angry never happens.

For me, even panic attacks/anxiety don't cause anger. I usually hide it...unless it's really bad and I need to nudge somebody or something.

Sothis

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She/her
Firene
Seen 10 Hours Ago
Posted 14 Hours Ago
17,837 posts
9.9 Years
I go from zero to prison really fast.
I'm looking into anger management.

you cannot hope to win
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Flowerchild

> feel the sunshine

Age 24
She/Her
Hyperspace
Seen 5 Days Ago
Posted July 7th, 2022
8,699 posts
13 Years
I don't really get angry/emotional at anything, even when I feel like there are things I should be upset about. Iunno. It's very rare for me to actually react strongly to things.