H-Man #89995

Are you reading this? Don't!

I live here.
Seen January 30th, 2018
Posted November 20th, 2006
87 posts
17.4 Years
Pokémon Johto - The Funne Version!!!
Hilarious, organic, exotic; in short, it's AWESOME!

Greetings, folks!

Considering the reaction of the previous edition, I believe that it is time for an updating, and then I thought... why not set it here?

So, for all plebe who are actually interested in reading something that is not orthodox, especially as an 'original trainer' fic, I have this to say... READ UP!

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Chapteur Le First
—Kenta’s Quest! Pokémon, Pokégear, Poké-things!—


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It was one of the nicest days in the peaceful town of New Bark. Then a Swalot jumped on a Dodrio that was about to squawk and ate him in one gulp. “Swalot!” it said later, before burping, saying his own name again.

Meanwhile, inside a house on the northeastern corner of the city, a young boy jumped out of his bed, filled with happiness. Laughing like a maniac, he jumped into the wardrobe and closed the doors, before the wardrobe started to jump maniacally.

After a few minutes, he jumped out of the wardrobe, now fully clothed. He was wearing a red and white sweater over a red shirt, with yellow shorts and shoes as well. On his head, a yellow and black cap, turned towards his back, gave the final touches.

Looking at himself on a nearby mirror, he grinned at the effect, before listening to a call from down the nearby stairs. Taking his backpack from the nearby table, he approached them, and heard the call repeat. “HEY, KENTA! COME DOWN HERE!!!” a shrill female voice screamed, causing him to fall down to the floor, surprised. Getting up, he rubbed his head.

“Sheesh, mom, what’s the hurry...” he muttered, before heading down the stairs. On the lower floor, which looked a lot like every house in the country, he noticed his mom talking to the next-door neighbor, a plump old woman who had a dozen kids and had about a hundred trophies from her kids’ journeys. Nowadays she spent her time going to other people’s houses and telling them all about the golden trophies she kept on her house, placed on a stand in the living room where anyone could touch them. Despite everyone else’s requests, she kept saying there was no risk of theft.

Then again, that was a podunk town with about fifty families, despite being the entrance to Johto, something that was attested also by the cities of Goldenrod and Olivine. Um, it was also the place where all young and starting Pokémon trainers went to receive their first Pokémon, unless they lived on any of the other cities, where they could receive or catch them with help from the Gym Leaders. Uh... it was also the place where Prof. Elm, the leading authority in the Pokémon world, unless you remembered Prof. Oak, lived. It was also the homeland of...

Ah, enough about this, and let’s go on.

Anyway, Kenta, who was obviously the boy who has some strange importance, despite being a rather unknown character for the previous minutes, and therefore is listed here as the main character for reasons you don’t want to know about (YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THEM!), was staring at his mother and her visitor, who had been the focus of attention for several minutes before they turned their gazes to the city.

Finally, after the long and awkward pause, the boy ahemed, despite that not being a verb or a real action, and then proceeded to clear his throat in a coughing fit. This broke the previously unknown spell that affected the city, and now his mom was paying attention to him. “Yes, dear?” she asked, with a voice that seemed a bit strained. The fact that the plump old woman in front of her was apparently hoping to speak seemed to be related to that, but probably isn’t.

Kenta stared at her as if she had turned into a Dodrio hybrid. Well, if you asked any of the males living in the city who wasn’t at the vicinity of their wives, they’d say that that look was something usual for them, given how the somewhat young woman was sadly a single mother. Unfortunately for her, it just so happened that all the men in the city were unhappily married because of that. And most of this unhappiness came from the fact that they never let their husbands pursue their dreams, like skydiving naked or climbing Mt. Silver to the peak, or visiting the Azalea and Goldenrod Gyms, something they missed from their journeys. But that’s unrelated and we won’t talk about that, especially because we’ve got better things to do than listen to a bunch of old men whining about how their wives were horrible hags.

Seriously, we do.

As this monologue happened, Kenta stopped staring and decided to speak. “It’s just that you just screamed for me to-” he started, but was quickly interrupted as his mother quickly got up the table and moved towards him, laughing loudly as she took something out of her right pocket, obscuring the plump old woman from sight. When she was sure her face couldn’t be seen, her eyes quickly became pleading and her expression dropped to one of despair. Kenta easily noticed that it was the same expression all the other women in town had for their children (and, for some strange reason, he tended to be a normal target as well, despite not actually being friendly to their children; it was as though people expected him to do things for them for no reason) when that plump old woman visited them for five hours, which pretty much meant ‘Help me out or you’ll be grounded until after I die’.

Sighing as usual, he finally noticed the object his mother produced from inside her pocket; a familiar circular device with a specially designed LCD touchable screen, several switches for various functions, including one of his favorites, a systematic cellular antenna-and-duovocal sliding bar, which was something he didn’t understand other than it meaning the word ‘cellphone’. Combined into a very complex machinery piece, the POKéMON Geared Energetic Automated Receiver, which was usually shortened into POKéMON GEAR, and then POKéGEAR, but without so many capitalized letters, was the most recent device from Selected Industries of the Local Pokémon Humane Corporation, or Silph Co. Most people didn’t really know what the words exactly meant, and usually when asked the lawyers, accountants, and other technical people in the realm of business told them that they were part of a heavy code made mostly in protection of the rights of the people as potential customers. Which some skeptics called a bunch of technobabble, which was also an alternate official explanation according to the technical people, which led to several lawsuits by the part of the lawyers, but that’s too much digression for the mere explanation of a watch, and therefore, if you want the complete story, please read your economical history books.

His mother beamed, before moving around and making sure the plump old woman could notice what she was about to do. “Well, Kenta, Prof. Elm called earlier, while you were sleeping. He finished fixing your Pokégear, and left it here before going back to his lab, asking me to tell you to go to his lab. Apparently he had something else for you. Isn’t that great?” she said, before cocking her head to the side and giving a smile that made men in the city lose their footing and sigh sadly while their wives took heavy objects conveniently stored on their purses and smacking them on the head.

Kenta put up a smile and nodded, noticing how the plump old woman was in a mix between expectant and nervous. “Yeah, that’s great,” he said half-heartedly while taking the device on her offering hand and slapping it on his wrist, as with a normal watch, when the biomagnetic stickers kept it safe in place on his shirt. “So... Prof. Elm wants to talk to me?” he asked, sounding as hopeful as he could without actually being hopeful. His mother almost showed a tint of sadness go through her face, but if she did, it didn’t last a second; almost immediately, she increased her smile, to the point where he swore he was staring at an Octyllery’s lower and many times forgotten second mouth. Those were known by all people, when they were young and studious, as being dark and damp and usually that’s how they eat.

Keeping her large and scary smile, she cocked her head farther to the side. “Well, that’s what he said. But I am pretty sure he can wait some time, and Ms. Maple here was telling me about her fifth daughter, Meg, quite the delightful tale, really...” she told him, but her pained eyes were pretty much crying and screaming ‘Please-don’t-leave-me-alone-with-her-anymore-Please-don’t-leave-me-alone-with-her-anymore-Please-don’t-leave-me-alone-with-her-anymore-Please-don’t-leave-me-alone-with-her-anymore-Please-don’t-leave-me-alone-with-her-anymore...’ in a tone which’d have made a thief from one of Kenta’s comics proud.

In an alternate dimension where the thief lived, he sneezed in a strangely effeminate tone, while an elf Archmage was teleporting them around with a minor spell. But that’s another story which nobody cares about right now.

Kenta gulped, as he knew that if he didn’t do anything, he’d be forced to spend the rest of the day listening to Ms. Maple’s boring tales, something that nobody wanted to do. Yet, if he left his mother with her, she was probably and definitely apply a terrible punishment to him, one he did NOT want to know. So he did the best thing that came to his mind. “Ms. Maple, I think that Prof. Elm’s family would be interested in listening to your stories right now. My mother has to make some... cakes... for a sale we’re making,” he lied, giving off the most honest expression he could muster. Fortunately for him, Ms. Maple was too trusting of people because she wanted them to listen to her (something they tended to do), and so she remembered she actually hadn’t visited the young Professor’s family in weeks. She gave a small smile and told Fia, Kenta’s mom, that she would continue her tale the next time she came.

As she walked over to the door, Fia gave her son a thankful yet angry look, which was answered by a confused look. Yet, he said nothing; instead, he walked towards the door and opened it for Ms. Maple, who gave her good-byes and left. Kenta soon followed, leaving the house and taking in the mid-morning sights of the city. It was, as mentioned before, a small podunk town where nobody didn’t know each other, and there was a tendency for interbreeding, as in people marrying on and off families. As usual in small places.

Walking around, he noticed a young boy who was playing around, when he noticed Ms. Maple walking towards his house. As she approached, he paled and ran towards his house, closing the door with a loud noise. Simultaneously, the people closer to her started to retreat, which made the scene become quite comical as several grown women (and several men, but not as many) were running away from a woman who looked like she couldn’t hurt a Butterfree (unless you considered mental damage from utter boredom painful).

Sweatdropping as he saw the scene, he took the short path to the nearby laboratory. However, he noticed that there was a strange-looking boy about his age staring at a window. He had long, flowing red hair, in the sense that most girls have, and wore a black sweater and purple pants, as well as a look of perpetual scorn on his face. If anyone cared, they’d notice black sneakers as well. But nobody really cared, too surprised with Ms. Maple and knowing peace was gone for them soon. Still, he was a fairly new face there, something unusual that month. Kenta was curious, but he didn’t try to push the matter; for some reason, the guy gave him the creeps, and he didn’t like feeling those. Besides, he had something better to do.

Going inside, he noticed the only aide Prof. Elm had, a young man who wanted to work for Prof. Oak, he’d heard; however, the letter hadn’t come, and he ended up working for Elm. He walked past the bookstands, several having labels stating they belonged to a ‘Samuel ***’ person, and reached the backroom, where Prof. Elm was fiddling with a computer with a tag similar to the labels on the books, with the name ‘Samuel ***’ on the side. Along the room, there was a large machinery with the words ‘Portable POKéMON Collapsible Electronic Neuro-Technological Energy Restorer’, with a note below indicating that it was ‘a gift from the ***** POKéMON Centers, to Samuel ***’.

As he stared at those, Prof. Elm, a young man who had a strange haircut, turned around to talk to Kenta. “So, Kenta, you’re finally here... sit down, please,” he told him, motioning for a nearby chair.”

Kenta sat down. “You wanted to talk to me, professor?”

Elm nodded. “Yes. You see, I have been stuck to my neck in work, and unfortunately, I’ve been too busy with paperwork, to the point where I’ve stopped going off to the river to fish new species to eat- I mean study nowadays.”

“I think I get it... but do you need me to do anything?”

“Well, yes. You see, my old childhood friend, Tajiri, although he’s more known as Mr. Pokémon, has announced to me that he has a new discovery. He’s been always like that, really. In fact, talking about him reminded me of the time where we were in high school. He always went off in hunts for new things. Although most of them were in the female dorm. Then again, he was always such a...” he reminisced, when he noticed Kenta’s stare of utter boredom. He laughed nervously. “But that’s not important right now. What is important is that he asked me to check his newest discovery, but...” he motioned towards the large amount of paper that was on the table.

“So, you’re asking me to go see what this great discovery is?”

The Professor nodded, opening a wide smile. “That’s right! But since the path is dangerous for a lone boy such as you, I’m gonna get you a Pokémon!”

Kenta sweatdropped, making a surprised face. “Um, professor...” he tried to speak, but was cut off.

“Yes! For you will need one to defend yourself from the dangers of this world! There are no problems with relying so much on them, because that’s what they’re here for! You should do good by travelling around with them! And that’s something you’ll only get from me!” Elm said, taking on a pose and talking to air. Out of the room, the aide sweatdropped and went back to cleaning the labfloor, littered with paper.

Kenta sighed closed his eyes. Elm smirked. “I’m kidding, Kenta! That’s just what I’m gonna say on the next commercial they’re making about my lab.” Kenta just laughed awkwardly, before turning his gaze towards the red and white spheres, with a black line keeping the red half away from the white half. One was marked with red shirt buttons, one with blue shirt buttons, and one with green shirt buttons.

“Do I still need to take one, though?” he asked, annoyed. Elm raised an eyebrow.

“Kenta, you know that the League forbids people from travelling without a Pokémon. After all, it’s required for the upcoming tournaments that you kids start with a Pokémon early, so that you can grow up to become normal adults and take your rightful place as politicians.” Kenta half-closed his eyes.

“Why do you keep saying weird things?” he asked, causing the Professor to stammer to the ground, in a comical way. He stood up again, defying Physics as he did that in one second, and laughed.

“Oh, that’s just a joke. Don’t worry about that,” the professor told him. However, Kenta was still feeling uncomfortable. Still, the professor expected him to go to where Mr. Pokémon was, and he didn’t feel like disappointing him. But to take a Pokémon with him? He liked Pokémon as much as about everyone else in the planet, but unlike most people, his mother had kept him sheltered from most Pokémon, to the point where he had only studied them in books. And some of the things he’d read about the history of Pokémon weren’t what a young boy was supposed to know.

But his mother had tried to give him the best of education, and so he had learned much of the things most trainers didn’t even realize. He had an edge if he was forced, as he knew he’d inevitably be, to battle other trainers. And no matter how much he loved his town, he knew that his mother would be disappointed if he didn’t follow his father’s footsteps and became a Pokémon trainer.

In fact, that opened another question... why had he just thought that? His father hadn’t been a Pokémon trainer! He had been-“Kenta?”

Turning his gaze back to Elm, he noticed the elder man was confused. “You’ve been staring at the Pokéballs for minutes. I thought you had blacked out. Are you okay?” Kenta nodded.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I was just thinking about it. And...” he sighed. This was it. “I’ve decided that I’m going there.”

Elm opened a big smile, and quickly defied Physics again, appearing behind the table where the Pokéballs were lying. “Excellent!” he said, half-laughing, before motioning towards the spheres. “In here are three Pokémon: the calm and delightful Chikorita, the playful and joking Totodile, and the happy and loyal Cyndaquil! Choose one of them!” he said, while motioning from right to left. Kenta took a moment, gulping nervously, before getting up and picking the leftmost Pokéball, with the red shirt buttons. Elm then made a happy pose, giving him a thumbs-up, before quick-moving to the same place he was earlier. “Cyndaquil, huh? Great choice! It might be a bit slow on the uptake, but it makes up thanks to its own power!”

He then noticed the device on Kenta’s shirt. “Oh, yeah! Your mom must have delivered your Pokégear to you. Well, then,” he said, before pressing a button on his phone, which caused a long thin cable to jump out. Approaching Kenta, he inserted the small point on a hole designed for it. Then, he pressed another button, sending data into Kenta’s POKéGEAR. Once the process was over, the cable retreated automatically. “Now you have my phone number. Contact me if anything important appears, okay?”

Kenta nodded, before pressing the button on his Pokéball, which caused it to shrink, surprising the boy. Elm laughed a bit. “Don’t worry, that’s a normal system Pokéballs use. By shrinking, you can carry them easier than if they were in their normal size. Nifty, huh?” Kenta merely nodded, before he walked towards the exit, stepping on lots of paper along the way.

Before he could open the door, however, the aide walked towards him. “Oh, if you’ll excuse me...” and before Kenta could react, he took a Potion from his coat and put it inside the middle pocket of his backpack. “You might need one of these later on. Don’t waste them, however. Only use them if you are sure that your Pokémon won’t hold on for too long.” Then, he pushed the boy through the door, before taking his broom and cleaning the floor again.

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Next chapter data preview:

Kenta heads to Cherrygrove City, trying to find dear old Mr. Pokémon. But it seems that just finding the old man won't be enough for his quest to end! What is to expect him in the path?

Don't miss Pokémon Johto - The Funne Version's Chapteur Le Second:
—Meeting Mr. Pokémon! The Road to the Start!—

Check ya later!
Pronounced Haeight-Man-Number-Eight-Nine-Nine-Nine-Five. Or Jake Dunnas.

I am not one to overvaluate myself. However, if it so happens for me to be better than you, then I am better than you.

My life... has taken a bad turn. Apologies, people.

What is it about life and love that complicate everything, I ask?...

'There's a way for everything.' That's what I live for.

My schooling is... *sighs*

Ria

Minx Extraordinaire

The Delightful Company of THEM
Seen October 20th, 2007
Posted September 28th, 2007
127 posts
17 Years
/giggles maniacally/ That was awesome, man! Seriously, I'm typing this with one hand and wipping my tea from the monitor with the other ^^; Well done, you really made my day, I can't wait for the sequel ^^;

The Ineffable Agreement Fan
Haven't you heard? Love isn't just for perfect things...

And now, the purple fic - but not pruple prose -> I can't believe I'm doing this...

In the next chapter:
Spoiler:
I literally lost all feeling in my legs at the very thought of Gary finding out about my horrible blunder. Well, to be perfectly honest, running at a maniacal pace for over an hour could have had something to do with the fact that I could no longer feel my feet. Seriously, to my knowledge you had to be either Forest Gump or experiencing some kind of a cathartic state of trance which is considered a sign from god by some jungle-dwelling pagan tribes to run like that.

I made a mental note to use the fact that fear for my pokemon had the same effect on me a cocktail of hallucinogen mushrooms would have on most people to my defense.

H-Man #89995

Are you reading this? Don't!

I live here.
Seen January 30th, 2018
Posted November 20th, 2006
87 posts
17.4 Years
Pokémon Johto - The Funne Version!!!
Hilarious, organic, exotic; in short, it's AWESOME!

Well, after so many problems with transcribing this, at last, you shall receive the next part. AHOY!

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Chapteur Le Second
—Meeting Mr. Pokémon! The Road to the Start!—


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Outside the laboratory, Kenta found himself on the ground as the doors were shut behind him. Groaning, he picked himself up, and looked around. The small crowd had gone back into their random pacing, while that teenager was still there, giving off the same aura. The aide then stuck his head off the room and gave Kenta a note, stating that Mr. Pokémon’s house was to the north of Cherrygrove City. He sighed and walked towards the town’s exit, which wasn’t too far away; merely a few steps forward and then to the right.

Once he was out of the city, he noticed how the scenery easily changed; after a few steps, he was in a tree-filled plain with grass reaching up to his knees and several people walking around randomly as well. There were also some mounds separating the upper and lower areas that were short enough for him to cross over, yet everyone else he’d met, from what he had heard, tended to only cross these from the upper side.

As he walked around the corner of the dividing mound, a guy was running away from a small mix between a non-existing animal called the racoon and a wheel, which was obviously angry from being hit with a pebble. That creature, who was called a Sentret, jumped on top of the man and bit his head. “AUGH!” the man screamed, as the Sentret tried to suck his brains through his skull.

Kenta wasn’t paying much attention, however, so he didn’t hear the cries of pain and doom the man was screaming. Meanwhile, he noticed a strange sphere-like thing on the upper ground, despite the grass being all over it. “Huh? That’s strange,” he thought, before approaching it.

As he approached it, the spherical object turned out to be a purple liquid soap bottle that didn’t look like a sphere at all. Wondering to himself why did that happen, he decided to pick it up and put it on his bag, on the same pocket as the other one.

Turning around, he proceeded along on the path, while some guy was saying something about saving his progress to rest. Ignoring him, he noticed there was a building leading somewhere, but he couldn’t see past it for some reason. He decided to ignore it as well and head to the west, which was easy to do as the path progressed in that direction.

Soon, he found a weird-looking tree near a guy who was staring at his watch and waiting for something. Ignoring him as well, he looked at the tree, noticing there was a small berry stuck to a branch. After plucking it, he went down the mount and headed to the side, where he found a weird short old man sitting down and looking amusedly at a few women who were practicing off, on the square. He then realized he had finally reached Cherrygrove City.

There were megaphones all over the place, and they all played the same music, which was different from the one played in New Bark. Shrugging, he tried to walk ahead, when suddenly the old man stopped him. “Welcome to Cherrygrove, young man!” he said, in a cheerful tone, before noticing the single Pokéball Kenta had put on his belt. “Oh, you’re a rookie trainer, huh? I can tell! But don’t worry,” he said, noticing his look of pretty much despair, “everyone is a rookie at some point!” He then proceeded to laugh heartfully. Kenta shrugged, before trying to step ahead, but was stopped again. “Now, now, where are your manners?” the old man asked. “I have been alone for quite a while. What do you think of giving an old man some company?” he added, with a smirk.

Despite Kenta’s unease, he figured that he didn’t have much to lose, and so he nodded, trying to put up a smile. “Um, sure, I guess-” he started, before he got pulled by the man, in a comical image, towards a large building with a red roof.

“Now, that’s the spirit! Anyway, rookie,” he said, apparently not caring about Kenta’s name, “this here is a POKéMON CENTER. Here you can check the computers and the nurses and have your Pokémon’s energy restored for free.”

He then pulled Kenta towards another building, this one having a blue roof. “This one is a POKéMON MART. It sells all sorts of items for young trainers like you. Also, these are the best places for information... after the centers, of course.”

Kenta barely acknowledged that information, before getting pulled again, to the city exit. “This is Route 30 to Violet City, the first of many Routes in the future. You can find and catch Pokémon in there, and battle trainers.” Then he was pulled to the city lake. “This is the sea,” he said, as if it wasn’t just a small lake. “Many Pokémon can be found there.”

The old man pulled him away, staring at the women who were practicing along the way, and they stopped in front of a house that looked like every other house in the country. “And this is...” he started, before laughing for several minutes. “This is my house!” This comment caused Kenta to crash into the ground, in the same manner as Prof. Elm did that same day.

Slowly picking himself up, as he wasn’t used to quickmoving as the older man, he stared annoyed at his tour guide, who was laughing harder by now, to the point of tears. After a few moments, he reduced his laughter and wiped the tears away. “You know, thanks for making company to an old man in the ends of his life. Here’s a gift for you!” he said, before throwing a T-shaped card, which Kenta barely grabbed. It had a picture of Johto taped to it.

“This Map Card has data on all the cities and routes of the world. Have fun with it!” And with that, he entered the house and left Kenta, who was left alone. Turning around, he noticed that the women were staring at him for some weird reason. Their gazes seemed sharp enough to penetrate steel, and he didn’t want to test anything. “Um, if you don’t mind... he hesitated, before running away from the city.

Outside, on what he considered a safe area, he went on his merry way, while, in the city, the women stared at him, now realizing that the man was safely at his home and not away enough so that they wouldn’t be leered by him. This led to them screaming in fear before running into their houses. Of course, this was unnoticed by Kenta, who had long started his trek northwards.

After a few moments of walking, he found a house with some funny fat guy in front of it who looked a lot like the other fat guy he had seen earlier. This guy seemed to be looking bored out of his mind. When he looked at Kenta, however, his expression changed into one of delight. “Ohoho! You must be a rookie, right?” he asked, happily.

Kenta sweatdropped. “Well... yeah,” he admitted. The man smirked.

“Well, I know the perfect help for you! Just take one of these-” he gave Kenta a berry, similar to the one he had found earlier, “-and you’ll have good luck in your journey!”

Kenta gave a weak smile. “Um, how do I use these?” he asked, curious. The man looked at him, confused.

“Don’t you know how to eat things? Just give one to your Pokémon whenever he’s weakened and he’ll do the rest!” He then laughed again. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to watch TV. See ya!” And with that, he went inside the house and locked himself in.

Kenta was about to leave as well when he noticed another tree just like the first one. Approaching it, he noticed there WAS a berry in it, as well, and he plucked it out before putting both berries inside his backpack.

As he walked away, towards the northern area, he decided to see how the Map Card worked. So he looked at his Pokégear, the only mechanical device he had, and decided to insert the card in the only slot available. It went all the way inside, until it reached the small area where the T-top would be, and then the device beeped until it was finished.

Sliding it off, Kenta pocketed it before looking up; there was a crowd surrounding some sort of battle between two boys wearing identical white shirts, blue shorts, and blue caps. Ahead of them were two big purple-and-white rats with long fangs and red eyes. Of course, Kenta only saw these once he actually pushed through the crowd.

The trainer closest to him was giving the actual order. “Rattata! Tackle attack!” he screamed, causing the rat ahead of him to jump forward and hit the other one, before jumping back. He then noticed Kenta, who apparently didn’t understand anything and was about to ask him something. “Do you mind? This is an important battle! I’ll take my revenge for the cookies he stole from me!” he told him, angrily, before turning his attention back to the battle, when the other Rattata did the exact same move as the first one.

Kenta was about to reply, when suddenly the crowd became thicker and he was pushed back, to the ground. He sighed and picked himself up. He had something better to do, definitely.

The rest of the path was short; Kenta could easily see a house surrounded by trees ahead. There was another tree, so he decided to go get the probable berry before going inside. However, this berry was a bit different, being greener and feeling a bit more itchy to the touch. Still, he pocketed it in his bag, as he would ask Prof. Elm about those later.

Afterwards, he walked to the door and entered it. Inside, there were lots of half-open drawers hiding clothing, although what it was he couldn’t discern. The trashcan was filled to the brim with... something. And he was sure there were some weird pictures on the computer which an old-looking guy, wearing a full suit, with top hat included, and a weird-looking beard, was using.

He walked forward, stepping over discarded photos, and approached the guy. “Um, are you Mr. Pokémon?” he asked, trying not to stare at anything. The man turned around, in surprise, and his beard fell lower, as if it was loose.

He stood up, surprisingly being shorter than Kenta expected, and took a step forward, before he noticed his beard was loose and turned around to fix it. This took a few moments, and soon he was turned around again, looking better. “Yes, I am Mr. Pokémon, although my close friends know me as Tajiri, and my close female friends know me as God,” he said, in a cheap imitation of an old man’s voice. “Do you have anything for me?”

Kenta shivered, but decided to keep his cool. “Uh, no. I’m here because Prof. Elm asked me to see the big discovery you made.” He hoped he wasn’t sounding too afraid or anything. “What is it?”

The old-looking man nodded. “Indeed, I, Tajiri, also known as Mr. Pokémon, have discovered something amazing regarding the mating acts of Pokémon! It is the most amazing thing you could ever believe!” he exclaimed, in a proclamation of his intelligence. Then he turned around, fixed his beard again, and took an egg-shaped... egg... from a drawer.

“I received this egg from a couple of friends of mine, who obviously were impressed with my smarts and good looks, and they told me it was found after a couple of Pokémon were left together for a while! Isn’t that some fantastic news?” he asked, obviously impressed with himself. Unfortunately for him, Kenta wasn’t.

“Couldn’t you have studied their mating habits before?” he asked, causing the old-looking man to crash into the ground, his beard falling away and revealing the horrible, horrible truth.

He was a young man who used platform shoes.

Quickmoving back to his previous position, he started to laugh nervously. “Hahaha... kids these days,” he said, before putting the egg in another pocket of Kenta’s bag. He was about to ask him why did he put it there, but he decided against it. As far as he knew, things like that were starting to become customary.

Just afterwards, another man came from behind a large computer set, where he was busy doing something, probably a fixing. He wore an uniform that was awfully similar to what Prof. Elm wore, but his shirt was red. His clothes were in disarray, and now that Kenta noticed, there was something sticking out behind the computer, but he couldn’t see it.

That man was the very known Prof. Oak, a major figure in the study of Pokémon. He was important enough to have his own radio program, television program, merchandising, and a lot more stuff he had rights upon.

He had just taken out some device from his coat pocket, a rectangular red computer that looked like a tablet. It also was made to open up, as the lines indicated. In the top, there was a small antenna with a camera on the point.

Oak smiled at Kenta, noticing how he was surprised. “Oh, don’t worry. I am just giving this version the final touches... I believe, from your stare, that you know who I am, right?” he said, in a reassuring tone.

Kenta nodded, causing the professor to laugh. “Well, that is to be expected, for I am Prof. Oak, POKéMON Professor extraordinary!” he explained, once he was done. Kenta would sweatdrop, but he had no time, as the professor noticed the small sphere hanging on his belt.

“Hm? Is that a Pokéball?” he asked. Approaching it closer, he confirmed his suspicions. “Yes... it is. That makes you a Pokémon trainer, and therefore you merit one of these!” He gave Kenta the device, which opened at once.

Greetings. I am Dexter, the main computer for the POKéMON Device of Entendre Xtreamlined, or POKéDEX. Please state your name, gender, place of birth, date of birth, favorite color, type of underwear, favorite-” it stated in a monotone, before Oak grabbed it and pressed a button, deactivating it.

“Sorry... There seems to have a problem with these new models. Sometimes they just don’t know when to stop...” he laughed nervously, before pressing a couple of buttons in the back. He then gave it to Kenta again.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to head to Goldenrod for my show with DJ Mary- I mean, the show DJ Mary co-hosts with me. Good bye!” And with that, he left the house, climbing on a convenient Skarmory and flying away.

Kenta stared at his leaving form, before he decided that he had spent enough time there, and walked outside, while he fiddled with his new Pokédex. Just as he had finished inserting the last bits of information, his Pokégear started to beep, before the cellphone system activated itself. Kenta moved his wrist to his ear, as if he was holding a cellphone with his hand, while he put the Pokédex on his pocket. “Yeah?” he asked.

Kenta, this is horrible! I need you to hurry and come over here as soon as possible!” Elm’s voice cried in despair, almost hurting Kenta’s ear. He didn’t get it. Why was Prof. Elm acting so weirdly? He tried to talk back.

“Prof. Elm? Can you tell me what’s wrong?” he asked, confused. However, a few crashes and explosions blocked the answer. Elm’s voice came up desperate, soon after.

No! Stop! You have no right to-” he screamed, before the call was cut short for some reason. Only the sound of a dead phone remained.

Kenta slowly put down his arm, stunned. He looked at the screen. Only a ‘DISCONNECTED’ note blinked, back and forth.

He stood there for several moments, while it seemed to him as an eternity. Then, almost mechanically, he started to run away, all the way towards the next city. The crowd was nothing to him, and he barely noticed that he was jumping over the small cliffs, so wrapped up in what had happened.

Finally, he reached Cherrygrove, and was almost getting to the exit, when suddenly he bumped very hard on someone. As he tried to raise his head, he noticed that it was the same boy he had seen at the outside of Prof. Elm’s lab. The boy seemed to have recognized him as well, as the scowl he had almost constantly deepened. Kenta could almost feel the hatred he seemed to be giving him.

The boy stared at him, as he got up himself, and grunted before finally deciding to speak. “Get out of my way.”

Kenta gulped, but he took a breath. “Why should I?”

This caused the other boy to get angrier. “Because I’m telling you to. And you’re doing it and won’t complain, or you’ll regret it dearly,” he threatened, his low voice almost spitting venom.

Kenta almost took a step back, but he didn’t back down. “You were in the lab, weren’t you? Are you the reason why Prof. Elm was so nervous?” he asked, sure of the other boy’s guilt. This was proved when the boy angrily grabbed something from his belt – and now Kenta noticed he had a Pokéball as well.

“I told you to GET OUT!” he screamed, before he threw the sphere to the sky, causing it to open and let loose an energy surge, which soon took physical shape. It looked like a small blue crocodilian creature, standing in its hind paws. There were red scales sprouting on its back, and its torso was yellow.

Kenta’s Pokédex beeped once. “Totodile, the big-jawed crocodile Pokémon. Height is 0.6m, weight is 9.5kg. Gender is male. It is small, rough, and tough, and chomps at any moving object it sees. Turning your back on it is not advised. Even its trainer must be careful.

Kenta took a step back, surprised. This proved to be a bad move, as the Totodile, who was dancing happily for a few moments, stopped, its eyes staring at him. The other boy grinned evilly. “Attack him!” he ordered, something the Pokémon understood easily.

He jumped forward, his claws ready to tear anything to shreds... or so it would seem.

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Next chapter data preview:

The mysterious boy has chosen to fight against Kenta, who's forced to use Cyndaquil. Who will win? Also, there's a new quest in the end!

Don't miss Pokémon Johto - The Funne Version's Chapteur Le Third:
—The First Battle! Cyndaquil vs. Totodile!—

Check ya later!
Pronounced Haeight-Man-Number-Eight-Nine-Nine-Nine-Five. Or Jake Dunnas.

I am not one to overvaluate myself. However, if it so happens for me to be better than you, then I am better than you.

My life... has taken a bad turn. Apologies, people.

What is it about life and love that complicate everything, I ask?...

'There's a way for everything.' That's what I live for.

My schooling is... *sighs*