Moon's Pokemon Adventure

Started by Wingnut August 10th, 2007 5:06 PM
  • 3053 views
  • 28 replies

Wingnut

Moon: 12 years and counting...

Age 47
Maryland
Seen December 30th, 2007
Posted December 11th, 2007
201 posts
17.6 Years
Okay, everyone. This is my second sprite comic, but the first to feature my character Moon. A little info on Moon: She's a cat-girl character whom I've been drawing and writing stories about for over 12 years (That's her in my Avatar).



*Gwen is a bird-woman sorceress with whom Moon is staying in her backstory. Muffin is Moon's mouse-girl friend. I'll post up the story as soon as I can get it put online. I had it on a site a few years ago, but it was lost when they changed servers.

So, anyone want to see more of my comic?
I do sprititng requests. Feel free to PM me a request and odds are I'll do it for ya!
Age 30
Lurking in the shadows so I can steal your cookies :P
Seen July 26th, 2008
Posted July 17th, 2008
309 posts
16 Years
Totally funny, cute and original ^^ I'm looking forward to read more of your art;)
☆Credit to Sakurah for this lovely theme☆

~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
Currently watching:
Katekyo Hitman Rebron!
Bleach
Monochrome Factor
Gintama

Currently reading:
Katekyo Hitman Reborn
Bleach
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Psyren
Liar Game
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3780-7542-2400
My trading thread

[NovaPirate]

And the rest went riding on.

In that cardboard box down the street.
Seen February 13th, 2011
Posted December 28th, 2009
802 posts
17.5 Years
Don't mix styles. And try reading other comments so the critics don't have to keep on saying the same thing over and over again. Work on your grammar a tad.

Gaah.
This signature is under construction.
But dun worry.
It will most likely stay like this FOREVAH.
Because I'm nowhere near as active as I used to be.
-[NP]

Wingnut

Moon: 12 years and counting...

Age 47
Maryland
Seen December 30th, 2007
Posted December 11th, 2007
201 posts
17.6 Years
I appreciate constructive criticism as much as the next artist, but I have to take exception to the grammar comment. If there's one thing I pride myself on, it's using proper grammar while typing (and in my real life, as well). That's something that's rarely done on internet forums.

As far as mixing art styles? That's something I couldn't care less about. I put in what I like, and what works for the story I'm trying to tell. In the other web comic I did, the story revolved around a group of characters from several different games who traveled from game to game accomplishing tasks. Sort of like the old TV show Quantum Leap, or the comic book Exiles. I mixed so many art styles, you may have had a heart attack if you read it!

Anyway, chapter two will be up shortly.
I do sprititng requests. Feel free to PM me a request and odds are I'll do it for ya!

Wingnut

Moon: 12 years and counting...

Age 47
Maryland
Seen December 30th, 2007
Posted December 11th, 2007
201 posts
17.6 Years



Now I realize you can't catch Buneary in the Kanto region, but I'm taking certain liberties. It's my comic and I can do whatever I want, so nyah! :p
I do sprititng requests. Feel free to PM me a request and odds are I'll do it for ya!

[NovaPirate]

And the rest went riding on.

In that cardboard box down the street.
Seen February 13th, 2011
Posted December 28th, 2009
802 posts
17.5 Years
We're here to HELP you. Blatantly disregarding my advice >.<
Not exactly entirely smart.

Grammar:
Weakend. (Weakened?)
Where can I get me a Pokemon? (Where can I get myself a Pokemon?)

You don't need to show all of Route 1 for comic 2. You just need a small panel to get the point across.

Some of us take comics a tad seriously. Sorry. So.. NYAH!

Gaah.
This signature is under construction.
But dun worry.
It will most likely stay like this FOREVAH.
Because I'm nowhere near as active as I used to be.
-[NP]

Wingnut

Moon: 12 years and counting...

Age 47
Maryland
Seen December 30th, 2007
Posted December 11th, 2007
201 posts
17.6 Years
Okay, I didn't realize I spelled weakened wrong. My mistake. I'm actually a very picky person when it comes to spelling (I won the spelling bee in 10th grade for crying out loud!). So much so that I will probably go back and fix that. Thank you for being specific. However, I fully realize "Where can I get me a Pokemon?" is not grammatically correct. Not everyone speaks gramatically correct, though. Most people use slang or improper english all the time. I just want to convey a sense of real dialogue.

Also, I appreciate you pointing out the thing about route 1. I probably didn't need to use the whole map and I will keep that in mind with future installments. I don't want you to think I'm not listening to the criticism...

*Edit* Fixed the spelling error in Comic 1
I do sprititng requests. Feel free to PM me a request and odds are I'll do it for ya!
Male
Seen 5 Days Ago
Posted August 21st, 2021
5,853 posts
17 Years
As far as mixing art styles? That's something I couldn't care less about. I put in what I like, and what works for the story I'm trying to tell. In the other web comic I did, the story revolved around a group of characters from several different games who traveled from game to game accomplishing tasks. Sort of like the old TV show Quantum Leap, or the comic book Exiles. I mixed so many art styles, you may have had a heart attack if you read it!
I can see where you're coming from, but that was part of the joke for that strip, since they're all meant to be out of place. It's not suited for this strip. And besides, it wouldn't take much effort to change them to the more pretty, FRLG style ^^

Anyway, it seems kinda funny, so I'm looking forward to seeing more.
Age 30
Lurking in the shadows so I can steal your cookies :P
Seen July 26th, 2008
Posted July 17th, 2008
309 posts
16 Years



Now I realize you can't catch Buneary in the Kanto region, but I'm taking certain liberties. It's my comic and I can do whatever I want, so nyah! :p
ROFL, the angry Buneary is hilarious.
☆Credit to Sakurah for this lovely theme☆

~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
Currently watching:
Katekyo Hitman Rebron!
Bleach
Monochrome Factor
Gintama

Currently reading:
Katekyo Hitman Reborn
Bleach
Naruto
Gintama
Psyren
Liar Game
~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
3780-7542-2400
My trading thread
Age 31
Male
Where Giving Up Is Not An Option
Seen December 1st, 2014
Posted November 14th, 2010
947 posts
17.6 Years
Here to review your comic. Lets list the stuff that bugs me.

1. Mixing styles. It wouldn't be hard to stick with one style all the way, and editing your sprite in FRLG form will make it look so much better.

2. Grammer and Spelling. I see one spelling mistake, which is pretty good for someone's first comic (Right?). This has already been pointed out by Angel Of Twilight.

3. Frames. You do not need to label your frames with numbers. Simple rules are that you read left to right and then to next row - we are not too stupid.
Also, the frames are a little big, and in some comics they are inconsistent and look weird with one little frame, then one big frame (If you catch my drift) as the comic.

4. Links. Think about putting all your comics in Links in the first post, and maybe include a "Latest Comic" section.

5. Don't take crit so offensively. Enough said.

Wingnut

Moon: 12 years and counting...

Age 47
Maryland
Seen December 30th, 2007
Posted December 11th, 2007
201 posts
17.6 Years
Part 3 is up!



*EDIT* Thank you for the advice. I wasn't sure about numbering the frames, so I'll refrain from doing that in future episodes. Also, I'll go ahead and do the comic by links like you suggested. I have lots of ideas and I hope people are interested in seeing more! The only question I have is the mention of editing my sprite in FR/LG form. Which sprite are you referring to? I want to make my comic really stand out, so any advice is appreciated.
I do sprititng requests. Feel free to PM me a request and odds are I'll do it for ya!
Age 31
Male
Where Giving Up Is Not An Option
Seen December 1st, 2014
Posted November 14th, 2010
947 posts
17.6 Years

*EDIT* Thank you for the advice. I wasn't sure about numbering the frames, so I'll refrain from doing that in future episodes. Also, I'll go ahead and do the comic by links like you suggested. I have lots of ideas and I hope people are interested in seeing more! The only question I have is the mention of editing my sprite in FR/LG form. Which sprite are you referring to? I want to make my comic really stand out, so any advice is appreciated.

Probably change Moon's sprite to FRLG. Thank you for taking the advice the right way. Later.

Signomi

Age 32
Female
Britland (United Kingdom)
Seen 1 Week Ago
Posted October 10th, 2022
7,480 posts
17.8 Years
Matt Silver: I'd like to know why you'd find it alright to be unnecessarily abrasive in this post. There's no need for exaggeration, especially when your post is prone to hurting the feelings of others. Don't do it again.

Dance, Carmen! ☆★

Paired with Aizuke » @instagram

Age 30
Lurking in the shadows so I can steal your cookies :P
Seen July 26th, 2008
Posted July 17th, 2008
309 posts
16 Years
One question about the 3rd part: where did she get the pokeball from?
☆Credit to Sakurah for this lovely theme☆

~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
Currently watching:
Katekyo Hitman Rebron!
Bleach
Monochrome Factor
Gintama

Currently reading:
Katekyo Hitman Reborn
Bleach
Naruto
Gintama
Psyren
Liar Game
~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
3780-7542-2400
My trading thread

Wingnut

Moon: 12 years and counting...

Age 47
Maryland
Seen December 30th, 2007
Posted December 11th, 2007
201 posts
17.6 Years
One question about the 3rd part: where did she get the pokeball from?
The helpful guy in Pallet town gave her some in the first episode(Panel 3). I'll have the next episode up in a bit. Thanks for the comments, all!
I do sprititng requests. Feel free to PM me a request and odds are I'll do it for ya!
Age 31
Male
Where Giving Up Is Not An Option
Seen December 1st, 2014
Posted November 14th, 2010
947 posts
17.6 Years
Matt Silver: I'd like to know why you'd find it alright to be unnecessarily abrasive in this post. There's no need for exaggeration, especially when your post is prone to hurting the feelings of others. Don't do it again.
My post has been edited to disinclude the part I think you are referring too.

[NovaPirate]

And the rest went riding on.

In that cardboard box down the street.
Seen February 13th, 2011
Posted December 28th, 2009
802 posts
17.5 Years
I still don't understand why the Buneary started crying. It just.. started crying? Further explanation please.

Gaah.
This signature is under construction.
But dun worry.
It will most likely stay like this FOREVAH.
Because I'm nowhere near as active as I used to be.
-[NP]
Age 30
Lurking in the shadows so I can steal your cookies :P
Seen July 26th, 2008
Posted July 17th, 2008
309 posts
16 Years
The helpful guy in Pallet town gave her some in the first episode(Panel 3). I'll have the next episode up in a bit. Thanks for the comments, all!
Oh really? I guess I'll red 2 times from now on >_>'
☆Credit to Sakurah for this lovely theme☆

~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
Currently watching:
Katekyo Hitman Rebron!
Bleach
Monochrome Factor
Gintama

Currently reading:
Katekyo Hitman Reborn
Bleach
Naruto
Gintama
Psyren
Liar Game
~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
3780-7542-2400
My trading thread

Wingnut

Moon: 12 years and counting...

Age 47
Maryland
Seen December 30th, 2007
Posted December 11th, 2007
201 posts
17.6 Years
I still don't understand why the Buneary started crying. It just.. started crying? Further explanation please.

Because Moon poked it in the eye. I tried to sprite it out in the second panel, and then in the third where the Buneary is holding it's eye, but I guess it wasn't clear enough.
I do sprititng requests. Feel free to PM me a request and odds are I'll do it for ya!

Rivvon

Age 30
Female
USA
Seen 1 Day Ago
Posted January 30th, 2023
2,770 posts
16.1 Years
I still don't understand why the Buneary started crying. It just.. started crying? Further explanation please.
Moon poked it. EDIT: Postatthesametimelegasp! :o

This is funny! I really enjoyed it, and I can't wait to read more of it.


A Dream of Your Own: The Formulas of Unova—Black & White
Introduction | Part I: The Components of Unova

Wingnut

Moon: 12 years and counting...

Age 47
Maryland
Seen December 30th, 2007
Posted December 11th, 2007
201 posts
17.6 Years
Newest episode is up!



I wanted to get some more feedback about links. Does anyone else think I should just have links to the individual episodes on the first post and then just bump when I add a new one, or should I show them individually with each new post? Let me know! Thanks. :)
I do sprititng requests. Feel free to PM me a request and odds are I'll do it for ya!

[NovaPirate]

And the rest went riding on.

In that cardboard box down the street.
Seen February 13th, 2011
Posted December 28th, 2009
802 posts
17.5 Years
Rather cliche how the Buneary can talk. One day there should be a Pokemon that holds up signs instead of talking >.<

I've noticed your adaptation of TUP (Text Under Panels) which isn't a good thing. TUP is bad, speech bubbles are good. Try practicing implementing speech bubbles.

Make sure that she catches another Pokemon.. that can't talk. I don't understand how people have respect for these trainers with only one talking Pokemon. I, personally, would slap them for being vain >.<

Gaah.
This signature is under construction.
But dun worry.
It will most likely stay like this FOREVAH.
Because I'm nowhere near as active as I used to be.
-[NP]