Dilemma

[Lokhlan]

Okay...

I'm about to do something that I never thought I'd ever be doing on a community message board. Yet here I am, asking for relationship advice.

Meh.

Here's the problem. I like this girl who is 16. She is everything I tend to look for in a girl, funny, intellectual, likes geeky/nerdy things such as games, computers, basically a few of the same interests as me. Now, I want to ask her out, but I just can't bring myself to do it.

There are a numbers of reasons. One being the fact that I'm not sure how she'd react. No, it's not that I don't know if she likes me or not, because I've been told by various people that she does. So it's basically a fact. Not to mention all the stares, smiles, playful acts we exchange during school each day. It's the fact that she has stressed to me so many times how (for a lack of better words) unstable she is. By "unstable" I mean she is very emotional, paranoid. Things like that. She has also told me before that she'd have guy friends who would later ask her out & she'd then become really uncomfortable around them & would refuse to speak to them for long periods of time. That is something I'd rather not happen between us.

Two, she is moving to Florida at the end of this school year. This is probably my biggest reason for not asking her out. I'm really hesitant about dating someone who is just going to leave me within half a year. Especially someone who I'd probably have an extremely hard time giving up.

So my dilemma is, should I ask her out or hold in all my feelings towards her & simply remain friends with her?

I can't believe I'm asking something like this on PC... >_<

 

[Thomas]

Ok, dont be such a wuss. Sorry to be harsh but just get over yourself. Asking a girl out is not that hard. The worst she can do is say no. I used to be like this but once I did it once it wasnt hard the times after that.

 

[Lokhlan]

Ok, dont be such a wuss. Sorry to be harsh but just get over yourself. Asking a girl out is not that hard. The worst she can do is say now. I used to be like this but once I did it once it wasnt hard the times after that.

Did you not read any of what I just took the time to type? I've asked many girls out before so this isn't a bravery issue, it's a [I ain't used to this type of girl] & [should I ask a girl out who will eventually leave soon anyway] type of thing.

 

[Thomas]

She has also told me before that she'd have guy friends who would later ask her out & she'd then become really uncomfortable around them & would refuse to speak to them for long periods of time.

Backup, if you are really good friends with this girl I wouldnt do it. I dated one of my friends for a while at the beginning of the school year and she doesnt even talk to me anymore.

 

[AZSupraT]

Two, she is moving to Florida at the end of this school year. This is probably my biggest reason for not asking her out. I'm really hesitant about dating someone who is just going to leave me within half a year. Especially someone who I'd probably have an extremely hard time giving up.

I dont think the future heartbreak is worth it :(

 

[Ryoutarou]

Unless you're really in this for the long haul, i.e. long distance relationship...I wouldn't do it. It'd probably just end up hurting both of you in the end. And more so if you're good friends. But if you do want to try and have a long term relation then I say go for it.

 

[Angle-san]

if i was you i wouldn't do it because of the heartbreak if you like her
that much
2. not trying to be mean but when she stress it might be because of what her parnets would think of her or you. But it's your choice and you must find out yourself I know this is stupied to say but "follow your heart"

 

[Claire]

Okay...

I'm about to do something that I never thought I'd ever be doing on a community message board. Yet here I am, asking for relationship advice.

Meh.

Here's the problem. I like this girl who is 16. She is everything I tend to look for in a girl, funny, intellectual, likes geeky/nerdy things such as games, computers, basically a few of the same interests as me. Now, I want to ask her out, but I just can't bring myself to do it.

There are a numbers of reasons. One being the fact that I'm not sure how she'd react. No, it's not that I don't know if she likes me or not, because I've been told by various people that she does. So it's basically a fact. Not to mention all the stares, smiles, playful acts we exchange during school each day. It's the fact that she has stressed to me so many times how (for a lack of better words) unstable she is. By "unstable" I mean she is very emotional, paranoid. Things like that. She has also told me before that she'd have guy friends who would later ask her out & she'd then become really uncomfortable around them & would refuse to speak to them for long periods of time. That is something I'd rather not happen between us.

Two, she is moving to Florida at the end of this school year. This is probably my biggest reason for not asking her out. I'm really hesitant about dating someone who is just going to leave me within half a year. Especially someone who I'd probably have an extremely hard time giving up.

So my dilemma is, should I ask her out or hold in all my feelings towards her & simply remain friends with her?

I can't believe I'm asking something like this on PC... >_<

*feels need to revive relationship thread* XD
Tendo, the fact that she has confided in you shows that she doesn't see you as just one of the normal guys she would date. If it were the case that she was staying here, then i would suggest you talking to her. Ask her out but emphasise that you realise her concerns that she has so that she knows you are aware of them and will not hurt her.
But, since it is the case that she is moving to Florida, i'd suggest not to make a move. Since she describes herself as emotionally unstable, imagine how she'd become when it came to the time of her havin to leave and you having to break up or continue a very difficult long distance relationship? She would be very hurt, and probably become annoyed at her family for forcing her to move, and cause all sorts of troubles.
As much as you care about her, it's probably best that you leave a relationship as she will only hurt more when it came to her having to move (i know that i'd be more hurt having to abandon someone i loved than if someone broke up with me) so i'd suggest keeping the close friendship going. Who knows? She may move back at some point, and then things between the two of you can spark back up again

 

[1313666]

Take my advice: ask her out. If she says no, tell her that it was actually a $50 bet from one of your friends, and you just won. You'll blow the plan if you start crying your eyes out if she says no. Keep your cool.

FYI: this has worked a total of 14 times for me.

 

[MegaDitto]

Tendo only the truth could set you free so tell her what's in your heart.

 

[Legendary_Pokegirl]

Take my advice: ask her out. If she says no, tell her that it was actually a $50 bet from one of your friends, and you just won. You'll blow the plan if you start crying your eyes out if she says no. Keep your cool.

FYI: this has worked a total of 14 times for me.

If it turns out that she actually likes him back, but she says no, then how do you think that statement would make her feel then~? Dont forget, by the way Tendo described her, she is emotionally unstable. >.O She wouldnt take it well if she said no, and it would possibley ruin his chances of still being friends with her. Girls are very sensitive, and something like that is a cruel trick to play on most. >.> Woof~

But, as others are suggesting, I think if she is eventualy going to move away from you, then there isnt a point. Something like that will upset you both in great amounts. Unless both of you are up to a long distance relationship, there really isnt a point. ^^; I hope eventually you will make the right choice. Good luck!

~Karli

 

[Stripes]

Okay...

I'm about to do something that I never thought I'd ever be doing on a community message board. Yet here I am, asking for relationship advice.

Meh.

Here's the problem. I like this girl who is 16. She is everything I tend to look for in a girl, funny, intellectual, likes geeky/nerdy things such as games, computers, basically a few of the same interests as me. Now, I want to ask her out, but I just can't bring myself to do it.

There are a numbers of reasons. One being the fact that I'm not sure how she'd react. No, it's not that I don't know if she likes me or not, because I've been told by various people that she does. So it's basically a fact. Not to mention all the stares, smiles, playful acts we exchange during school each day. It's the fact that she has stressed to me so many times how (for a lack of better words) unstable she is. By "unstable" I mean she is very emotional, paranoid. Things like that. She has also told me before that she'd have guy friends who would later ask her out & she'd then become really uncomfortable around them & would refuse to speak to them for long periods of time. That is something I'd rather not happen between us.

Two, she is moving to Florida at the end of this school year. This is probably my biggest reason for not asking her out. I'm really hesitant about dating someone who is just going to leave me within half a year. Especially someone who I'd probably have an extremely hard time giving up.

So my dilemma is, should I ask her out or hold in all my feelings towards her & simply remain friends with her?

I can't believe I'm asking something like this on PC... >_<

You know what you just told all of us? Tell it all to her. Later on in the future you'll ponder what if... Life is to short for what ifs. I feel if you tell her exactly like you told us what your feeling, things will turn out for the best.

 

[^^NICK^^ v.3.0]

Yeah, if she's a good friend, I'd leave it at that. I'd hate to take a chance at ruining friendship over a relationship, a relationship that's not garaunteed to work out, that might make the girl not wanna talk to you. I would try to keep in touch though.

 

[1313666]

If it turns out that she actually likes him back, but she says no, then how do you think that statement would make her feel then~? Dont forget, by the way Tendo described her, she is emotionally unstable. >.O She wouldnt take it well if she said no, and it would possibley ruin his chances of still being friends with her. Girls are very sensitive, and something like that is a cruel trick to play on most. >.> Woof~

But, as others are suggesting, I think if she is eventualy going to move away from you, then there isnt a point. Something like that will upset you both in great amounts. Unless both of you are up to a long distance relationship, there really isnt a point. ^^; I hope eventually you will make the right choice. Good luck!

~Karli

Sorry. I let my big brother handle this thread. He was bored.

FYI, he's also a bigger liar than my little brother.

 

[paige pelletier]

go for it! Is my opinion I mean if you like her ask her. Just tell her how you feel she might understand and who knows maybe she wants you to ask her out. Oh and for the part where she will move all you have to do is stay in contact with her.

 

[1313666]

ASK HER OUT!!! Here's what will happen if you don't:

She moves to Florida, and you start banging your head against the wall yelling "WHY DIDN'T I ASK HER WHEN I HAD A CHANCE?!". Believe me, if you ask her out, it will save some stress and money from the medical bills you'd be getting for cracking your head open.

 

[KoBRe LaiR]

Tendo, as the rest have said, just ask her out and se how it goes. I mean you may in the end, just end up as friends still. You never should pass the chance to try things out. If you think your friendship is gonna be ruined, just make the date special if she does accept, if she doesn't just act cool and remain friends.