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LAst Letter

flame_chi

Heero Yuy....?
    • 1,433
    Posts
    21
    Years
    i had to write a Social Studies project
    about bein a soldier in the war
    writtin to a love one
    so i wrote a poem in mine
    theres my poem


    LAst Letter

    There i was sittin with the boys
    writtin this letter to you
    All around us are loud noises
    like bombs n guns going everywhere
    we wait til it's our time to fight
    i dont know if this ill live
    i dont know if this would be my last letter
    but i know one thing
    i would always love you
    know matter what
    now its it to go
    when the time is right
    ill be waitin for you
     
    You have the right idea and everything, but grammer seems to be an issue here. There is just a better feeling of it if you use the proper words, insted of shortening it such as words like "n", also it seems that punctionation could be needed to tell the person reading the poem when to stop, and when to begin.

    But maybe thats what you were going for, which I can understand if you're trying to get that "soldier" persective. Great job though.
     
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