Liquid's Poems

[Kyosuke]

Dreams

This is a poem I wrote that I made me think how important it really is to have a goal in life, and if you have a dream its best to try and follow it the best you can, no matter what it is.

Dreams​

Hold fast to dreams​

For if dreams die​

Life is a broken-winged bird​

That cannot fly.​

Hold fast to dreams​

For when dreams go​

Life is a barren field​

Frozen with snow.​

 

[Kelsey]

I think it gives the reader a delicate feel when reading it, LT. ^^ I do think you could try to lengthen it just a little bit more, but otherwise I tihnk your poem is wonderful. ^^

~Kelsey

 

[Midori Chi]

ooc:Hmmm...cool! You need a little help with the amount of words you use for rhyming...but other than that...I like it!

 

[Kyosuke]

The thing is I really wasn't trying to put alot of words into it, I was just trying the "Short and Sweet type Approach" ^^, but thanks for the advise and reviewing Kelsey, and trap-door57.

 

[flame_chi]

The thing is I really wasn't trying to put alot of words into it, I was just trying the "Short and Sweet type Approach" ^^, but thanks for the advise and reviewing Kelsey, and trap-door57.

it might be short
but i still like it

 

[Stripes]

Yep pretty meaningful poem Thunder.

 

[Kyosuke]

True Happiness

This is a poem that I thought of today, and it made me think and come to the assumption what true happiness really is.

True Happiness

True Happiness is attempted all around the world,
It could be small and simple, to as valuable as gold.
Its said that money cannot buy it
For it cannot be bought,
Something people of all ages are rarely taught.

But why is it so hard to achieve this goal?
Its a question that makes everyone stop and see,
the simple things that are ignored in life,
such as family, friends, and even your life.

Material possions cannot make you truly happy,
because once their gone, your left with an emptiness,
an emptiness that cannot be easily fixed,
an emptiness that will always be missed.

Thats why true happiness cannot be achived,
may it be a loved one, parent, or possion.
Everyone on earth is left with an emptiness,
an emptiness in life wanting more,
an emptiness in life that asks one, "Can't there be more?".

 

[Miyu-chan]

This is so true. This poem reminds me of a quote I heard,
"When you have everything, it is hard to appretiate it."

I love your poem. =]

 

[PikaPal]

thats SUCH a great poem!!!!!!!!! It really speaks the truth!

 

[Kyosuke]

Thanks Miyu-Chan and Pikapal, its good to know that people understand what true happiness is.

And Miyu mind if I use that quote? Its a really nice quote XD.

 

[Miyu-chan]

No, I don't mind. =] Actually my pastor in church said it, so don't give me the credit. xD;

 

[Geometric-sama]

I like the content, and the rhyming pattern is good. You have to read it a few times to get it, but it's good after that.

 

[Elite Four Lance]

Your poem wasn?t bad. I think it was cool.