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Ok

code zerro the deluge

I'm a boss.
    • 459
    Posts
    19
    Years
    Ok so every body's hating
    People compasating
    They say that I'm this
    They say that I'm that
    But all of it's fiction none of it's facts
    Now do a little a math


    Ok so they say that they heard
    That I'm am bad all I do is curse
    Vocabulary wack
    Talks a lot of smack
    All he is is a hack
    Well they all hatin
    Just compasating
    They are just blown
    So

    Ok so every body's hating
    People compasating
    They say that I'm this
    They say that I'm that
    But all of it's fiction none of it's facts
    Now do a little a math


    Well they try to shut me down
    Tried to take da crown
    Took and locked my song and stuff away
    I tried to talk and say heh
    They say that I'm this they say that I'm that
    But all of it's fiction none of it's facts


    Ok so every body's hating
    People compasating
    They say that I'm this
    They say that I'm that
    But all of it's fiction none of it's facts
    Now do a little a math


    Though I hang out in the streets
    I could kill in a week
    But my heart is pure I am meak
    Girls call me the freak
    But they just hating
    And compasatin
    Mad I ain't with them
    Who cares beside I think they aren't but him

    Ok so every body's hating
    People compasating
    They say that I'm this
    They say that I'm that
    But all of it's fiction none of it's facts
    Now do a little a math
     
    This is a rap, I assume.

    Since some people say that rap is poetry, I might as well treat this one as poetry. What bothers me the most is when you repeat the refrain. It makes the piece boring and redundant and I just get bored as I read down. Moreover, you have a lot of spelling errors and especially rhymes that are just made up just to make it sound so. If you're trying to say a hidden message and bashing someone at the same time (which I noticed in most of your poems), it gets really, really old. Overall, just try to improve the structure of your poem. Oh and especially the content. I dislike poems that sacrifice content for the sake of rhyming.
     
    Ugh.. let's not try and get into some debate if some rap is considered poetry or not..

    Your poem does rhyme and has somewhat of a consistant flow.. I'm still very unsure if your "sampling" again like you did before, and with some of the things your writing about, like with people taking your "crown" and such, its very questionable I have to admit... but it could be all of what you did I'm not sure.
     
    well in terms of how people put it anything with crown is mine. U people make me seem like an injustice to the freaking society.
     
    We don't try and make you seem like anything.. but when someone plagerises.. I hate to say it, but that pretty much screws them over anywhere they post.

    But I don't want to get into a whole "thing" here, just saying..
     
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