View Full Version : Monster

Careful With That Axe, Pichu!
December 30th, 2006, 12:23 AM
Still unfinished and confusing, but maybe a nice piece. C+c greatly appreciated. ^^

Overhead the blues the first impressions were uphold,
Dared to hit our eyes whenever we drew dimly near.
And our ground stood scored again, beside the waves of cold
The breath of ages during through the wretched straits of fear.

Don't hunt the whale, the screech was longing to be heard
When two beasts fight but one has forced to justify
the dwelling first or last but frozen only by the word
And hit towards the sand, piercing heavens with the cry

Monster was the call, inhuman the hand
Weeping as a symphony but wrecked above the sand.

January 21st, 2007, 1:55 PM
hehe I love your rhymes and I like how you describe and I can paint a picture in my mind with your descriptions. Totally awesome, man! ^w^ are you really 79 yrs old btw? O.o

Careful With That Axe, Pichu!
January 21st, 2007, 3:43 PM
Thanks for the comments, Yesterday. Yes, I try to make imagery a priority... And btw, I'm not 79 years old. When will people drop it? XD

January 21st, 2007, 4:01 PM
o ok! I thought it's creepy for a 79 yr old to be in a kid's forum