Hey, I noticed you copy and pasted your story as I suggested, which is cool! There's one other suggestion I would like to make, though, and I'll do it here since I haven't read your story yet. I noticed that the lines are single spaced, which isdue to the forum formatting. Because of that, it's a bit hard to read. If it's possible, edit your first chapter to have a space after each new paragraph? One example if you're not sure what I'm talking about is check this story out and noticed how the way it's formatted is much easier to read. I apologize if this causes you trouble.