Recent content by Barrels

It's a phenomenon I think I shall refer to as sh*t-blindness ;) it's like snow-blindness, except with sh*t. Mountains of sh*t. Stupid outrageous sh*t. And you think I'm kidding but I bet this is actually his conscious and deliberate policy when dealing with the media. ('What's the one thing...

...I kid ;) no, seriously, if anyone should gone all brain-smooshed it's me. I'm the one living in the Glorious Fatherland of our Dear and Supreme Leader, President Donald J. Trump, Hallowed be his Name, He Who is the Trinity, the One, the All, the Father, the Son and the Holy Satsuma. Yeah. ;)...

Are you OK? :O :O

WHAT NO OKAY. I'm a bumface, in a major sort of a fashion, and the only feeble defense I can muster is that I TOTALLY DID MEAN TO drop you a snarky little line on December 31st ;) something along the lines of 'in b4 2017', you know, making light of my staggeringly late lateness. (Speaking of...

okay, right, so... HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU LOVELY CREATURE, YOU :3 just look at you, knocking off the years like they're coconuts! (That is a slightly tortured metaphor, yes. Moving swiftly on.) You're now even MORE old and wizened than when we first met, which makes me feel good about myself, for...

We have a 10 piece Greasy Bag o' Chicken Nuggets for just a dollar forty-nine! ;) (That's right, I'm picking up the conversation where I unceremoniously dropped it on its head a month ago and hoping you won't notice. Because it's totally a common thing for people to burst back into one another's...

Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line. All calls may be recorded for training purposes and so that, one day, in the hideous and apocalyptic future, humanity's distant descendants will be able to look back on how it all went so very wrong and conclude that the original mistake was...

omg what I'm back from 'murica no less ...i bet the time difference is still wonky af isn't it ;) x

Aha, now that rings a bell! I am SURE you've mentioned Legally Blonde before, and about 90% sure you were just as aghast when I confessed to being an ignoramus on the subject. ;) Is it about a blonde? Is she legal? Am I a disgusting individual for even suggesting that? ALL THIS AND MORE TO...

I had to Google Brooke Wyndham. xD and you knew I would, for you are intimately acquainted with my lack of acquaintance with anything a) musical or b) filmic. It's not like I'm studying it or anything. ;) apparently Brooke Wyndham was in Legally Blonde? Or The Devil Wears Prada? Or a documentary...

Okay, so, proper reply time ;) There ARE random fires and chunkless buildings everywhere, how did you know? :O it's like the London riots all over again, except not in London because that was basically the only place that voted to stay. Also Scotland. ;) I remember where I was when Michael...

i movin to murica bro :DD no srsly more soon ;) xxx

I'M NOT IGNORING YOU HONESTLY ;) I'm just in the process of packing my life into boxes at the moment and we've finally started writing proper, meaty messages to each other again, the kind of message your most ancient Neanderthal ancestor would grunt proudly at before sighting down his bow at a...

Tan? You'll go ORANGE, my friend, orange like a satsuma (or, um, an orange) and who wants to do that? Well, apart from the inhabitants of Essex and the shaved primate currently running as the most likely candidate for Prime Minister of This Great Nation. Did you hear we've upped and left Europe...

I believe you have mentioned this ;) it's all right, though, our version is all Britishified and not the real deal either. I mean, it's cool, but this year I was tired and sweaty and spent more on the ticket than I did on merchandise, which left me feeling vaguely dirtied, like I'd paid for...