My friend and I, a long time ago, once decided that religions are potatoes.
Religions are like a sack of potatoes. You open it up and there are so many different choices for each potato.
Islam is a plain hot potato. Outside it's covered with a rough exterior skin of rituals and dogma. It's plain and to the point, and handle it too much and you're likely to be burned. It also claims to be just like the normal potatoe, but you're still likely to get burned.
Catholicism is like a loaded baked potato. This one, unlike the Islamic potatoe, has been left to cool and is 'older' than the Islamic potato. It also has a rough outer skin of rituals and dogma, but it's been opened up and 'sweetened' over time by things like sour cream, chives, butter, and cheese to make it more appealing. This is, even though it's older if you delve to far in you're still likely to get a nice burn.
Judaism is a frozen potato, it's much older than the Catholic or Islamic potato, and costs more too.
Protestants and Moderate Christians are like fast food french fries. They're a mixed up bunch, but if you look back far enough they were once a regular potato. But some have too much salt, or not enough, and some are overcooked, or cold, or soggy, or way to hot to handle. (coughWestborocoughcough).
Scientology is an empty potato sack that you have to pay to have refilled with new potatoes that are 'better' than other potatoes.
Pagans are like mashed potatoes, they look nothing like other potatoes and they have been mashed up and degraded over time.
Buddhists, Taoism, and Hinduism are Asian and don't eat potatoes, they're rice instead.
We were insane teenagers...shhhhh.