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The Winds And Her Smile

7,901
Posts
20
Years
  • Um...hi...
    It's been a while ever since I wrote a poem...
    So...I hope you guys like this poem I wrote about a special person whom I miss in my life...

    -Winds and her smile-

    As I stood atop a hill
    I felt the wind blow through my hair
    It made me think of her
    And of things my heart couldn?t bear


    The wind reminded me of her smile
    A simple thing made in many ways
    So beautiful and so innocent
    It?s the thing that made my days


    The time I remember with her
    Was the time when she sat next to me
    With her long flowing hair untied
    She was like a bird, oh so free

    She?s different than any other girl
    Her smile is so pure and so soothing
    So gentle and so serene
    So na?ve and so heart warming


    What I want to see in this world
    Is to once more see that smile
    It makes my heart soar
    And living life worthwhile


    Winds and her smile
    Oh so simple things in this Earth
    They?ve been there together
    Ever since our birth

    They are the things that I love
    Within my whole entire life
    The free winds and her gentle smile
    They make my mind with less strife
     

    Kelsey

    ~-*-~-*-~-*-~
    1,912
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • Seen Mar 30, 2005
    Awwwwwwwwwws, that was such a beautiful poem, oni. <3 I think it's sweet that you'd dedicate a poem to someone whom you loved so dearly. I'm sure if she were to read this poem now, she'd smile knowing you care. ^^

    I saw no spelling errors and your poem's flow is very well done. I really love this poem oni, it's very heartfelt indeed. <3

    ~Kelsey
     

    Mari

    ♠ [child] p r o d i g y
    2,268
    Posts
    20
    Years
  • Waii~!

    That was so sweet! I <3 how you expressed your fondness over her; it was so touching. I'd really love to see how she reacts.

    And, as Kelsey said, there was no spelling errors and this poem is just so heartwarming! <3 I simply can't stand not re-reading it. =3
     

    Kyosuke

    .·Simple Complexity
    2,485
    Posts
    20
    Years
  • Wow that thats nicely written, its easily seen that its from inside, with the words that you chose to the way that you wrote it. No complaints here, that was very good, and like I say, hard to critique because you're just writing what you feel.
     

    Mr Cat Dog

    Frasier says it best
    11,344
    Posts
    20
    Years
  • It doesn't matter how long they take. Frosty once said to be that Ozymandias, supposedly the greatest poem ever written, was written in 15 minutes whilst the author was drunk. He gave this big long lecture to JA about it :P Most of my poems don't take long to write... although I am blowing my own trumpet XD As long sa htey come from the heart - I hate using that word when describing things like these - they'll be fine in the end
     

    Kelsey

    ~-*-~-*-~-*-~
    1,912
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • Seen Mar 30, 2005
    oni flygon said:
    Ah...thanks so much, everyone! ^^;;

    For a moment I thought that thread won't be discovered...>.>

    Awwwws, but how could it not be discovered? <3 This is a great poem, not to mention I'm in here 24/7 anyways. XD So I was only bound to discover it at some point. ^o^

    ~Kelsey
     

    Miyu-chan

    .::f l o w e r g i r l::.
    5,956
    Posts
    20
    Years
    • Age 35
    • Seen Apr 23, 2014
    I love it. =3 I love your choice of words, which expresses your feelings for this special person in your life. =) Just beautiful. n_n
     
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