Dear Anonymous,
... You haven't got a clue what this is like for me. You don't even give a **** what this is like for me. Because it's always you. You, you, you. Selfish little you. Sure I sound like some angsty teenage girl: "Oh no one cares about my problems no one listens to me whine whine whine." Well yeah. Sure, I'm sure people care, but they've yet to show it. There is no one I can talk to about this. Do you know how horrible it feels? I feel so empty, I just need someone, anyone, to tell me it's okay, to help me get through this. I just need a sign. I need help. I can't do this. It just carries on, nothing I do is stopping this inevitable train wreck, it's my fault, I let myself get in too deep, and now I'm the only one out here. I've tried talking about this to people, I really have, I'm getting nothing. All they've done is make it worse... I'm not strong enough to handle this. No, no, there's nothing you can do. Nothing you will do. Nothing at all. Because you're already doing everything you can, everything I've asked of you. I suppose I should thank you, you are trying. But you're destroying me, because as quickly as you've built this up, you're tearing it down, and I'm going down with it. It's funny really, just how much worse this becomes every day. It's funny how much more this is affecting me now, because before the last couple of weeks... I was fine. I was getting through it, like I always had, I was happy with what it was. But now? I don't know if I am any more, and I don't think there's anything you can do to help me, which is why I wont ask.
I shouldn't even be doing this. What will it achieve? Like you'd ever even see this. And even if you did, nothing will change. I'll carry on like I always have, and you'll carry on with whatever you do, I was never important enough to you to know any of that, to know the real you. Heh. Maybe if you'd given me that chance things would be different, I wouldn't be typing this, or maybe not. Who knows? It's happened now, I wish it wasn't this way, I do. Really I do. I'd give anything for this to change, but anything isn't enough, I can't make you do anything, any less than you can I.
I won't forget you, ever. I never want to forget you either, who knows where we'll be a year from now? Time will tell. I hope you're somewhere amazing, like you deserve.