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What I want in a girl

Palamon

Palamon

Silence is Purple
8,158
Posts
15
Years
    • I don't know if I've talked about this before, but I'm sure I have. What do I want in a girlfriend/this girl being my partner? That's...a difficult question. But, what I want in a girl: I want her to love me, body and soul, for who I am, as I am my soul, not my body, but my soul. Who doesn't want a love like that? I know that's the kind of love I want. Of course, in return, I'd love her, for who she is, body and soul. Maybe that sounds like a hefty requirement for love, no? Well, that's what I want out of love. I don't think I'll ever find a girl like that.

    If I do, I'd marry her. But, it's too early for all that. I still think I'm too young for love. Hell, I don't even understand it. I don't even know what love is. That sounds like manga, but I really don't. It's such a complex feeling and I can't grasp it. All I know is that love is apparently warm and not all pink. I also know love is something people fight for. Fictional or not. I also know that love these days is so much different...I don't understand it. Nor do I have any grasp on what it is. If I knew, I'd probably give it away frivolously.

    And if I ever find that girl, I don't know, maybe I will. Maybe, one day, I'll find my soul mate. But need I remind you, my parents are homophobic. Or more like, insulting of that stuff. So, if I have a girlfriend, I'll never tell my parents. I'll keep it a secret, and to be honest, I'm sure if I told them, they'd force me to dump her. ...Ouch.

    Oh, and when I was confused, I once asked mom if I could be bi. She responded. "No you're not. You're straight." Yeahhhhhhhh...no, sorry mom. I'm not straight. I like my own gender. I won't let you try to think I'm straight.

    But, you know? It's not like anyone will ever love me anyway. I'm not good enough for anyone, I can't do anything right. And I'm so weird. Why would anyone want me as their girlfriend. That's right. I knew that from the beginning, but I still wouldn't mind having one. It's not like I'll get one anytime soon, though. I'm not even ready. I don't understand love, and I'm pretty sure all my suitors aren't even in my state.

    Ah, well. It was a nice thought.
     
    Kura

    Kura

    twitter.com/puccarts
    10,994
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • Then again, how else would you expect your mom to react to that question to help your confusion? Especially if your mom doesn't understand what it physically feels like to consider liking someone of the same sex.. AND if you said it in passing (instead of sitting down and having an actual conversation about it.)
    Then again, I don't know your parents, but perhaps you shouldn't be so quick to brush off the idea of acceptance.
     
    Melody

    Melody

    Banned
    6,460
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • *hugs a palamon*

    I definitely understand the feeling. My mother can't cope with me being/becoming female; so it makes things a little rough since I live with her now. >_>
     
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