Kozoi

Hey Kozoi! Just telling you,The Darkened Day is in chapter two.

Remember? The rpg that Toxic had?

And is now Darkly's. O.o

First off, I don't know who rated your thread with one star. Second, it really isn't fair to say that that's exactly why you got a one-star rating. There are other problems with the story, as I've brought up in the first chapter. Many of these have to do with details (namely, that, in the first chapter, we really didn't get much until it seemed like an afterthought to bring it up and that, in later chapters, you occasionally have the tendency to be vague -- like describing a machine as "questionable") and grammatical/spelling problems. It's possible that the member who rated your story was referring to that.

Either that or the entirety of the argument. *shrug* When someone rates a thread, they're usually taking into consideration the whole of the thread, not just one particular part.

The achual problem was your friends rating my thread 1 star (Terrible) without even reading the story because it had pictures. People like that are really annoying.

To quote Inigo Montoya, "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

As in, just because a post gives you criticism on what you're saying doesn't mean it's spam. =/ Spam would be if I went into your thread and posted "omg i liek pikachu." What people (myself and the others there) are saying is relevant to the thread, considering it's commenting on your style of writing. It's just not exactly the nicest thing you could get from us.

I'm sorry for all the racket around your story. I hope you do better next time. Just remember that fanfiction isn't roleplaying, even though they might be somewhat close to each other. Ask a mod, preferably Astinus, to lock that thread for you. Also, I hope my post didn't offend you.

Anyway, good luck with the revised version of your fic!
By the way, I like your username ^-^

Just got back from College, read my post in two minutes.

As a note, most computers actually come with a word processor by default. You may want to check to see if you already have one. Look for Microsoft Word, Microsoft Works, or TextEdit, depending on your OS. Alternatively, if you use the online spell checker I gave you, you can bundle it with Notepad or Wordpad, which are necessities on Windows computers and are, therefore, on all of them. (I'm pretty sure variations are also on every Mac as well.) Either that, or go get permission to install OpenOffice. If you're worried that you'll get turned down, it's practically a necessity when it comes to school papers anyway, so you're going to eventually need a word processor either way. In terms of fanfiction, it's also a necessity because the ability to save your work without publishing it is really an essential for any aspiring writer. You don't, after all, have J.K. Rowling publishing chapters of books that she wrote earlier in that same sitting.

Point is, no, you can't write directly on a board and expect us to react positively to it. =/ That's why you're getting negative feedback here. And to tell you the truth, I really don't know about where else you've posted your work, but remember that PC isn't any of those other venues. You're going to get a different sort of venue, and I really have no doubt PC's a bit stricter than what you're probably used to.

Additionally, if you think I'm repeating myself, it's only because this is a pretty important point, as pointless as you think it might be.

Yeah, i understand i do have errors regarding grammar and spelling mistakes, but thats how most fanfictions are. Nobody is perfect on fanfictions on their first and second ones. This is my second fanfiction, my first was a complete failure.
I can relate to you on the first fiction failure thing, but that is still no excuse to not make your fiction better. I had to scrap my first fiction four chapters in because it was so terrible, but I worked hard to make my second fiction much, much better. Just look here and you'll see what I mean.

I am glad that you're taking the review much better than before, though. It shows that you have matured during the course of, what, a day?

As for the moderator thing, it is unfortunate that it took a mod to change your mind, but that seems to be how it works on forums. Normal members such as Xanthine and I try to point out something, the person who created the thread violently defends what they did, and the argument goes back and forth until a moderator steps in and the thread creator finally sees the light.

It's also unfortunate that you aren't allowed to install Open Office on your computer without permission. However, you can still use Notepad to an extent, or even Wordpad. Neither really give you the spell check or grammar check that you need, but at least it will allow you to return a day later to proofread before submitting your chapters. If you at least do that, and the change is noticable, then I would feel more comfortable reviewing your fiction.

A little note about the "I" issue you have. Whenever you use the word "I" at all, as in referring to yourself, then it should be capitalized. The only examples I can think of at this moment are "I" and "I'm" though. Just a little tip to help you out ^^

Continued from your response:

Added by me: Uhm, why don't you try achually reading it. Seriously, the descriptions only need to be brief, i don't need to spend 20+ lines describing how a Hoppip looks.

You don't need 20+ lines to describe anything. You just need a simple description and a name (or even simply a name, given we already know what a Hopip looks like anyway), not an image. Images are the easy way out, and they imply that your writing isn't strong enough to stand on its own. In other words, for someone only glancing at the fic, it's bad advertisement.

I'm working without a word processor then i click preview and read over it then i use the spell checker.

Bad idea. Use a word processor. You're under less pressure if you use a word processor because you have a place to save without having to resort to posting an incomplete work. That way, you can leave the computer (for meals, et cetera) and can write longer, better quality chapters.

and images are useful because they give the readers a good idea of whats being described.

As I've said before, they're just an easy way out and bad advertisement because it says your writing is weak.

IC - In character
OOC - Out of character.

The 'OOC' portion was notes for people to read,

In fanfiction, the phrase "OOC" refers to when a canon character isn't acting the way they do in canon. What you're describing is called an "author's note."

and a general overview of whats happened so far if people can't be bothered reading everything.

Why would this be necessary? =/ Your audience is assumed to have read up until that point because this is fanfiction, in which readers usually start from the beginning and work their way forward. You don't have people jumping in partway through.

Edit: Open Office. It's a word processor that's free to download.

Hey, just wondering what item i found in your RP Pokemon Kanto Region

Hello I would like to reserve the pokemon Ralts in your Rp Pokemon Kanto Region

Hey there!

Please read the rules to see what is necessary to get your hack approved.

Hey in your Kanto RP what wild pokemon did I encounter?

Hey sorry I haven't posted in the one RP for route 1 yet I just haven't gotten the chance and can't think of anything for posty inspiration. i might be able to get my first post up tonigh after dinner.

hey can i join your md rp?

hi, i requested to be in the mystery dungon RP. im not sure if your still doing that, but my friend and i would like to join. (glaceon39 is my friend)