Awwhh sorry about that! And to be honest...
I got pretty bad depression/ anxiety in highschool and had to go on Paxil which messed with me (it ended up being worse than getting better and I'd physically not be able to move in the mornings.)
I took a leave of absence on PC and at the time I was sorta drifting from my friends (some of the staff I knew IRL from highschool) because of the problem.. but I didn't want to seem an irresponsible staff member so I told people I was back cause I wanted to try and do my "modly duties" but I couldn't end up keeping up with it because of the problem + applying to universities + life.
So I basically got demoted after like 3 weeks of not being able to keep up.. erm.. I dunno.
I don't really care anymore.. but since staff members knew me IRL and knew what I was going through, I kinda felt more like they demoted me because I wasn't as close a friend anymore rather than because I wasn't actively performing staff duties enough.. since other mods like Kylie (no offense to her, she's great but I just remember her doing this) had been on LOA for months at a time (half a year or more) and were able to retain their position, and come back with no problem like as if they were just gone for a day.
I used to think they were just being inconsiderate because it came out of NOWHERE (not even a PM like "hey you're being really inactive, is something wrong?".. nope. Nothing.. lol) but now I just kinda shrug it off and don't really care. I think it was kinda a good thing, cause I needed to focus on me instead of a forum. I didn't really care about the loss of position, I cared because I felt like my friends had just suddenly rejected me for no reason. I look back on it now and tried to consider it was probably the depression that made me think like an idiot, but when I look back, I feel like my feelings were honestly appropriate.
I don't hate staff for it, nah.. what good would that do? I just put it behind me, however I don't see a position of "moderatorness" to be a big deal anymore. I just chill and enjoy my time here, and I think that's time better spent because I have other more important things to think about and do. It just sorta opened my eyes to realizing that.. people don't care about you, in the end. Well, most people anyways, I can't speak for your friends or relationships.. but you gotta look after yourself. You can't expect others to understand or WANT to understand how you feel.
So that's the story.. lol..
