Health update: I've been found to have high creatine levels in my urine, somewhere around 7.4. The first batch of bloodwork didn't find anything wrong, so no one is quite sure where all this creatine is coming from. I'll be going in and out of medical examinations all week, so if I disappear for a few days, now y'all know why.
Dammit Andrew, your crappy health is hereditary.