1: Have you ever seen a story so bad, you didn't know what to say about it?
Yeah. *points at Tokyo Mew Mew* That one was so bad, though, that I burst out laughing every five seconds, so that might not count.
Then, there's a story I wrote when I was nine years old. The story was about a 12-year girl, Liisa (this is probably the 3rd most popular name of all times in Finland), whose parents had horses and when one of the horses gave birth, she got the foal. If I remember right, she ran away from home because her parents wouldn't let her ride all the time and she rode away on her horse who wasn't even a year old (horses have to be at least three years old before you can even train them) and took three apples for food. She, of course, gave the apples to her horse and almost died herself before reaching a boarding school with other 12-year-old girls with horses. Yay!
After ten or so pages I got fed up with the story, ended it by writing "THE END" with big letters and started writing an equally crappy sequel for it.
2: What was the title of the very first thing your wrote?
That would have to be "The Little Birch" (Pikku Koivu in Finnish), which was about this little birch tree who had fun with its little tree friends, like another birch and a spruce if I recall correctly. It didn't have much of a plot, really, but then again, I was six at the time. I even made it into a little book with illustrations.
Clearly, I was born to be a writer, don't you think?
EDIT: I got ninja'd! This thread has come back to life again!!!11