La Storia della Arcana Famiglia [SU/OOC][T]
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December 4th, 2012 (3:30 PM).
! I love Alex's unique fighting style of tactics over brawn and the simple crown arcana mark was a nice touch; I can see him being a perfect candidate for the Intelligence sector's leader once he learns to control his powers. The only slight issue was the lack of story after he obtained his arcana card, but the way it's written makes it seem like he's only had the card for a very short while anyway so I'll let it slide - can't wait to see him in action :)
@Retro Bug - Charisi's elegance and flamboyancy will certainly make her stand out from the other characters, nice choice on her style there. She seems terrifying and yet very interesting, I'm really interested to see where you take her character and especially to see if she finally reveals her feelings to the rest of the family, also what happens to her father! The only problem I can see is that if she's unable to control her emotions and they can take over her better judgement, it's very unlikely that she'd be appointed as a sector leader - leaders need to have pretty much flawless control over their emotions or the consequences could be enormous :3 I suggest either changing her position slightly (maybe make her an adept, that way she's still a high rank but she's not quite in charge?) or changing her emotional control slightly to balance this problem out and then she'll definitely be accepted as a character :)
@Khawill - Thanks for adding the new history,
! I must say, her new history made me laugh many times haha. I'm interested to see how her dog will come into her character and the way you made her based around intelligence and skills rather than being a pure fighter is great to see, it'll certainly add some diversity to the RP. Can't wait to see what happens to her :D
! Thanks for making the changes, Tobi's SU is looking great now! The idea of him constantly striving to reach the family's standards leaves him open to a lot of niche plot tangents so I can't wait to see where you take him - he might even make a suitable leader for the Sword sector someday if he becomes a powerful warrior and learns to control his emotions. Excited to see what's going to happen next c:
hnggg he's cute!
A little description of his appearance would be nice (not vital, just helps) but you need to specify the shape & location of arcana mark before approval since that's going to come into the story in the future. Also in his history you never specified how he received the Star card but rather just said that he was given it; it'd be good if you could edit in a bit more detail about that event. Otherwise the SU is awesome and it'll be accepted once those minor details are added. :)
@Skymin - The SU is looking great, I love the uniqueness of his personality & powers compared to other characters and the detail of his appearance is wonderful plus it's great to see an alchemist appearing, but it seems that The Star card has just been snatched up by CWP (assuming he makes the minor changes soon!) so unfortunately you'll have to alter his character slightly to contract him with a different arcana card. Apologies for the inconvenience - hopefully there's another card waiting that you'll want to use instead :)
Can't wait to read more soon! We're nearing enough characters to start now once the last couple of SUs are sorted out so the IC thread will be submitted in the next couple of days :)
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