[Previous PotM Winner][August] Would You Date a Trans Person?

Would you date a transgender person? To be clear, I'm talking about an individual who identifies as the opposite gender of their birth sex--who may or may not be transitioning. It's kind of a complicated issue and I'm always interested in hearing people's honest opinions. It also gives an opportunity to clear up some myths about dating a transgender person.

I would totally date another trans woman.

haha Nope, I wouldn't :) I'm just not into that and, although I agree with the freedom they have to choose their life style, I just wouldn't do it at all.

I have (a ftm), and there was no problem whatsoever in my mind. I'm always in it for the emotional connection first, so gender isn't really an issue for me.
It may be attributed to the fact that I'm pansexual, but I honestly can't understand what some people's reservations are >_<

Is it because you know that their sex is different from what they identify as? If so, then what's your thought process?

Being pansexual as I am, means that I'm attracted to all people; regardless of their gender or identification. So it's the person that matters to me the most.

I would have no problems dating a trans person; regardless of their status and/or transition state/goals. If I love a person; that's what it is. I'll do whatever I can to make them feel loved and happy.

I think there is an issue coming up that's worth exploring. This idea that trans women aren't "real" women; therefore, they are undesirable. I'm not going to deny reality: I was born male. I can't run away from that. It would be like the first 25 years of my life never happened. No history, no family, no friends before then. I've heard of trans women doing that, but it wasn't for me. I think there's also the idea attached that trans women don't really look like women and can't be sexually attractive as women. I assure you, this isn't the case. I've seen and known plenty of beautiful trans women that I would have loved to date--if they weren't straight.

I have no problem with trans people, but I find it a bit weird to date one so no.

I don't know how to explain my answer without seeming insensitive. No, I would not.

Sure I'd do it. I wouldn't hop into bed with them on the first date though but I would still take them out on a date and what not.

I wouldn't. Even though I like both genders. I tend to stick to the female gender more than the male gender.(I know surprising right?) But I just dont like people who do that. I mean you are perfect just the way you are. Why would you want to change that?

reniersnyder said:

I wouldn't. Even though I like both genders. I tend to stick to the female gender more than the male gender.(I know surprising right?) But I just dont like people who do that. I mean you are perfect just the way you are. Why would you want to change that?

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I didn't really have a choice. I'm a girl, but I was born with a male body. It's not really something I could just get over. I tried many times and failed.

Well,Nope i wouldn't ..it would be weird and i won't feel comfortable.

Psycho Yuffie said:

I didn't really have a choice. I'm a girl, but I was born with a male body. It's not really something I could just get over. I tried many times and failed.

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Well i know stuff like that happens. And were a body is severely burned at a young age and the parents turn them into the opposite gender. But overtime their past will end up catching up to them. I didnt mean any offense. Im sorry if i offended you in any way.

As Slenderman said... It's hard to say no without coming across as insensitive but I have to take that stance anyways. Transgenders are just not cut out for me, and if my parents found out I was dating a transgender, oh boy.

No. I don't really want to sound like an ass, but here are some of my thoughts. Too many characteristics of the original gender carry over. Specifically when it comes to body figure and facial structure. Sexual intercourse would just be awkward. This is partially due to my ignorance, but can "man made" genitalia feel any pleasure, and how similar is to actual genitalia?

reniersnyder said:

Well i know stuff like that happens. And were a body is severely burned at a young age and the parents turn them into the opposite gender. But overtime their past will end up catching up to them. I didnt mean any offense. Im sorry if i offended you in any way.

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It does get offensive, even if you mean well, and it can make you come off as insensitive or uneducated.

An earlier explanation of being transgender may help, as you don't seem to fully understand the potentially life-threatening effects of being "a girl living in a boy's body".

BraveNewWorld said:

This is partially due to my ignorance, but can "man made" genitalia feel any pleasure, and how similar is to actual genitalia?

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You might be surprised that a surgically-crafted vagina is just as capable of intercourse and can have as much sensitivity as a natural one, given the time necessary for nerves to repair themselves post-surgery. After a while, some can even self-lubricate just as effectively as a cisgender woman's. If a transwoman is "living stealth"—meaning they never reveal to someone that they used to be a man—you most likely wouldn't be able to tell the difference at all.

Retaining masculine bodily features is also really just in the voice (which can be trained and the Adam's Apple can be shaved if desired) and the bone (which some deal with through feminisation surgery), and neither of these potential issues become present when treated early on (obviously it's ideal to begin before puberty). The rest of a transperson's body realigns itself through hormone replacement therapy—it can do some serious science over time.

It would only really bother me if they took it to a sexual level. There's different levels of that kind of stuff. Anything super intimate would be really awkward if they associated themselves with the opposite gender.

I wonder if a lot of people who identify themselves as transgender are less of a sexual orientation and more of a victim of gender typing? Kind of like an extreme tomboy/tomgirl kind of thing - and I wonder if a sex change actually changes that. Not trying to sound intolerant or oversimplifying things but I bet there's multiple reasons for someone identifying themselves as transgender, ranging from hormonal differences to aforementioned gender typing.

I wouldn't mind that person being a friend though :p

Corvidae said:

It would only really bother me if they took it to a sexual level. There's different levels of that kind of stuff. Anything super intimate would be really awkward if they associated themselves with the opposite gender.

I wonder if a lot of people who identify themselves as transgender are less of a sexual orientation and more of a victim of gender typing? Kind of like an extreme tomboy/tomgirl kind of thing - and I wonder if a sex change actually changes that. Not trying to sound intolerant or oversimplifying things but I bet there's multiple reasons for someone identifying themselves as transgender, ranging from hormonal differences to aforementioned gender typing.

I wouldn't mind that person being a friend though :p

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This is an extremely too common argument used against trans people. In the case of a trans woman: "They're not really a woman, just a really feminine man." Sometimes they add in "gay" for good measure. As if gender identity and sexual orientation are the same thing. The opposite for trans men. While I am feminine, I'm not hyperfeminine by any means. I don't wear makeup or skirts. I only rarely feel in the right mood for a dress. I like pants and shorts, although my tops usually have a wide range from feminine to masculine. I'm okay with both. But what does that have to do with gender identity? Nothing, actually. It's called gender expression and it also isn't linked to gender identity or sexual orientation. Neither are gender roles.

I don't feel a need to go over the top with my gender expression because I know what I am. I don't have to prove it to anyone. Despite my slightly masculine dress, people never refer to me with male pronouns. I have the voice and attitude down pretty pat. How? By allowing myself to be who I really am. After overcoming confidence issues, it was pretty easy from there. It was all already inside of me. Not every trans woman is so lucky, though. Point is that I'm trans because I'm a woman, but my body was born male. It sucks, but it honestly isn't that big of a hindrance in my life. Most people judge trans people harshly until they meet someone who is trans. Experience is the best teacher.

My opinion may sound harsh, but it's my right to be entitled to it. There ain't no way in hell I believe that 'women born in a man's body' crap. Sex is defined specifically by physical parts, not mental. I'm sorry but if your born with a dick, then like it or not, your a man. I guess technically you could say that your a 'man born with a women's gender'.

However, I am not against people getting sex changes. It's their body and their life, they are entitled to do whatever they please. Hell, I'd even be happy for those individuals if they are happy about it, despite my views. But would I ever date one? Nope, I'm strictly straight.

Kyrul said:

My opinion may sound harsh, but it's my right to be entitled to it. There ain't no way in hell I believe that 'women born in a man's body' crap. Sex is defined specifically by physical parts, not mental. I'm sorry but if your born with a dick, then like it or not, your a man. I guess technically you could say that your a 'man born with a women's gender'.

However, I am not against people getting sex changes. It's their body and their life, they are entitled to do whatever they please. Hell, I'd even be happy for those individuals if they are happy about it, despite my views. But would I ever date one? Nope, I'm strictly straight.

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Unfortunately, your definition isn't always true. Where do intersexed people fit in your world of extremes? What about people who are born with female genitalia from birth, but later find out they are genetically male--and vice versa? What about those who are born with extra sex chromosomes? If reality doesn't fit your definition, then only your definition can be wrong and not reality.

I think, to me it would depends where along the transitioning line someone was. As long as they were masculine and liked similar things to me, we would probably hit it off.

I think it would probably be harder to think of a trans person romantically if I knew they were trans straight away. I feel like "LADYBITS" may be screaming in my head even if logic says otherwise.

I'm not really sure how effective ftm junk works (does it pump up? idk) and that would be the crux in forming a relationship with them. Sex isn't everything but it's still quite important.

I'm taken anyway so this won't be an issue.