I said I'd write a review of BTW for Nick, so here it is... and I apparently can't write a review under 1,000 words so apologies for the tl;dr nature of it.
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Music reviews, for me at least, are hard to write. I don't listen to new music that often, so on the rare occasions upon which I do buy a new album, I have to listen to it in its entirety at least three times before coming to a conclusion. Even then, a good review arguing the opposite conclusions to my own can normally sway me to change my mind somewhat as well. For an artist like Lady Gaga, whose presence has become so ubiquitous not only within the realm of music and whose self-promotion has become relentless in the months leading up to this release, writing a review JUST about Born This Way feels incomplete, in a way. Her intense appeal to some, and the vitriol she inspires in others, transcends the one album and one EP produced thus far. Most people will have an opinion on her even if they've never heard the trite, wannabe-anthem-esque stylings of The Fame or the richer and spunkier tunes of The Fame Monster. Hell, it feels like I'd heard most of this album before any of the songs had even been released, due to her publicity machine dialling it up to 11 and never letting up for the past couple of months. But now it's here and, for the most part, it's worth waiting for.
Let's get this out of the way: none of the songs on BTW are as good as 'Bad Romance' – an almost-perfectly crafted pop sensation that wondrously showcases Ms. Gaga's vocal prowess and electric stage presence. The closest that BTW comes to that level of sonic success is with 'Scheiße', whose thumping techno-beat is juxtaposed brilliantly with nonsensical German and strident feminist lyrics, all coming together in a chorus that I'd love to start singing in the middle of the street (but don't for reasons which become obvious to those who have listened to it)! The best of the rest have, somewhat unsurprisingly, already been released to either the general public or the populace of Facebook's Farmville spin-off, 'Gagaville'. (She's ever so subtle in her self-promotion!) The opener – 'Marry the Night' – starts off slow, but builds and accelerates to a rapturous conclusion that comes out of left-field and yet makes complete sense upon reflection. The title track is one that I've been increasingly hot and cold about ever since its unveiling a few months ago. However, listening to it in the context of the album as a whole, and its derivative nature and blatant theft of at least three Madonna songs feels rather at home. 'Hair', 'Yoü And I' and 'The Edge of Glory' are the most mainstream songs on the album, and a part of me wishes they were all piano ballads. However, another part of me respects the simultaneous theatrical restraint and vocal dexterity that all three songs share, and the one-two punch of the latter two songs is a great closer to the album.
As much as I think the maxim 'less is more' is still broadly applicable to this album as a whole, the worst songs on BTW are guilty of being too little, rather than too much. 'Electric Chapel' has its occasional moments but mostly feels like a footnote to the rest of the album. 'Government Hooker', on the other hand, I just don't get the appeal of at all. Maybe it's the hardest-hit victim of the weird censorship dominating the whole album (which… WTF?); maybe it's that the lyrics want to sound naughty but come off as strangely quaint; maybe it's the weird placing of it in the album (between the thumping dance-tracks of 'Born This Way' and 'Judas'). Whatever it is, it feels like Ms. Gaga underwent a lobotomy for this number, only to spice it up with tacky references to JFK and prostitutes to get people talking about it.
On the whole, however, BTW is populated by many qualified successes. I hated the aforementioned 'Judas' upon first listen (apart from the infectious "Judaaaas/Judaaaaah" chorus) but, like the title track, its placement on this album is less surprising when viewing the album as a whole. Gaga's pet themes of Christianity, prostitution and general outrageousness all pop up here, and the song's worst qualities seem diluted when compared to the rest of the album. 'Americano', with its quasi-ABBA/Ennio Morricone origins, should be an unbelievable success (especially the ending), but it's one of the slower numbers on the album and feels slightly lethargic as a result. I really want to hear a version about 10% quicker to see how much of a difference it makes. 'Highway Unicorn (Road to Love)' and 'Bad Kids' fall prey to Gaga's largest musical excesses and production values, but don't back them up with cogent lyrics; both essentially satiate her 'Monster' fanbase, telling them all that they're wonderful and should never change. However, they don't offer anything more profound to a wider listenership. 'Bloody Mary' and 'Heavy Metal Lover', while I can understand their popularity amongst fans, feel the most out of place on the album, given their respective tempos. However, both of them have really impressive hooks that keep my attention, even if they're not going to rise to the top of my list any time soon.
In an act of impulsiveness, I ended up getting the bonus edition, so I guess I should mention how good the bonus tracks and remixes are. The bonus tracks are essentially a microcosm of the album as a whole. 'The Queen' would be the greatest Eurovision entry ever submitted, if it cut off at the three-minute mark. (That's meant as a compliment, not an insult!) Pounding rhythms and pianos give way to a petered and less energetic conclusion. 'Fashion of His Love' has kept growing on me since its first listen, but it feels as derivative as the aforementioned title track, ripping off Whitney with such abandon and glee. 'Black Jesus + Amen Fashion' is striking when listening to it in the moment but strangely hard to remember a few minutes later. It becomes drowned out when sandwiched between the eeriness of 'Bloody Mary' and the over-the-top nature of 'Bad Kids'. As for the remixes, none of them stand out. Each of them have about 30 seconds of material in which you think they're going to get going, but them revert to plodding club beats that neither fit with the tone of the original songs nor add any new dimension to them.
BTW is probably not going to win any converts to the Haüs of Gaga, but even the most casual Gaga-fan will find something to take away from it. It's incredibly derivative, and the lyrics of most of the songs leave a lot to be desired for anyone who isn't one of Gaga's Monsters, but the intense energy penetrating the bulk of songs and the insane highs that a select few of the songs achieve make me wonder why I'd ever think 'less is more' would work for this album. For Gaga, more is definitely more, and that suits her just fine.
Grade: B (Leaning towards a B+, but I don't think I'm quite there yet)