Sunglasses are the epiphany of sexy. Take an ordinary, filthy, muddy pig, equip it with sunglasses and what do you get? A Hawt Pig. OINK! On the other hand it's hard to make a spectacle (bad pun I know) of yourself when you are wearing normal, geeky glasses. Put geeky glasses on a ordinary pig, and what do you get? A Nawt Pig. So naturally being a Hawt Pig, I dont wear glasses.
Piggedy Pig: *puts on shades*
You make me want to come over there and eat you, Piggedy Pig.
Piggedy Pig: Oink!