How's those online relationships working?

[Bestintheworld]

Seems like many ppl here are "married" or in some sort of relationship that goes beyond just friends. I never had an online relationship much more enjoy face to face interaction and the real life aspect. So those out there in reltionships here or jitsu online in general how do they start? Why do you like them? And how do people react when you tell them your in an online relationship, or do you keep it quiet?

 

[Honest]

It's interesting, we were actually discussing the very same topic in my Philosophy class yesterday. From what I've assumed and gathered, an online relationship that starts online can be a real relationship, but it is likely strained for several obvious reasons. Most people would contribute the lack of face to face communication as an indicator of a relationship in turmoil, but since that is essentially what online relationships are, I guess it's safe to assume that some people find it easier to deal with in certain ways. Living life behind a screen allows for people to manipulate their person online, often crafting it so that it is appealing to many others. Not to say that every relationship is like that, but that's definitely something that happens. Of course, it is very possible for reality to mix with online life, as has been witnessed on this very forum. Captain Fabio and Kura are the best examples that come to mind; they met online here, and are now in a very happy relationship, as they see each other and everything.


Personally, I've looooong since given up on it, like 4 years ago. And it wasn't even an online relationship more than it was a crush. I just realized that the commitment it'd take and the hardships I'd face were not, in my eyes, worth it. But, of course, whatever floats your boat. I'm genuinely happy to see people be happy together, regardless of medium.

 

[Angelique]

I like pairings because they are a declaration of love, whether it be platonic or romantic. They start when someone cares for someone else. Both offline or online pairings hold substance in the eyes of the beholders. Who's to say that despite meeting online, I haven't seen his face or heard his voice or exchanged presents with him on Christmas Day? I assure you, I have. It's very sweet of him, as I have difficulty approaching people offline. He tries very hard to get me to come out of my shell so I can feel comfortable around people. I'm blessed, thankful, thankful of all the times he put up with me and get to know multiple sides of me. Regardless, it's all between you and your partner, so who cares what others think.

 

[Bestintheworld]

^Thanks for that, it gives me a perspective that could apply to my own online pair here :3 How did it happen? I had my usertitle set as "pair?" because I was feeling a bit lonely, i've never been in a more intimate relationship and i'm 18 so I thought I might as well start somewhere. She wanted a pair as well and asked me if I'd like to be her pair, after a little deliberation it was decided.

My pair isn't my girlfriend and I don't even know her that well, I guess it's just a commitment to try and grow together as people, learn about your pair, be nice and there to listen when they need a friend. That's it really :)

If you want a pair here i'd suggest you blatantly advertise yourself as available an be NICE, not the bane of PC :D Maybe a new account would be a good way to start over.

Uhh who are you giving advice too? This isn't an advice thread I asked how ppl feel about online relationships. Did I say I was looking for or wanted one?( if your advice is directed towards me) please read what I wrote and stay on topic

FYI I'd never take advice from someone who has a disclaimer stating their a pervert and you wonder why you haven't been in a intimate relationship lol

 

[Sopheria]

I never understood it either...then I fell in love with my current pair and well, the rest is history <3

 

[Honest]

I'm going to step in this thread one time, and request people not take personal shots at one another. Keep it civil, and please be wary of what may or may not be flamebait. Thank you.

 

[Meganium]

My previous relationship was mostly online, so I know how it feels to not be "there" for your significant other. However, yeah...I think in another thread I mentioned I had a crush on one of my [former] pairs. At one point we were GOING to take a step forward into our friendship and convert it to a relationship. But we both backed out, because we were just too nervous. It was also mostly because I couldn't afford to go into another long-distance/online relationship.

I mean, as Dipu mentioned, some online relationships can work. It's up to the couple to work them out as much as possible, so that way there will be multiple chances of skyping, chatting, and even more, having to see each other in person. It's a matter of keeping the communication alive, while keeping the spark intact.

 

[TY]

I am currently in a relationship online and it can be difficult from time to time. I'm happier than i ever could be right now though so it all makes up for the flaws online relationships may have.

 

[gimmepie]

I was in an "online" relationship at one point. It was actually a surprising experience and I don't know how it happened but it wasn't a "we met online thing". She was the daughter of a friend of the family so we did meet in person a few times but mostly our interaction was online since she lives several hours away.

Then one day she deleted me off of facebook and randomly stopped talking to me and I haven't seen or heard from her since. So I think it went well I guess?

Honestly that relationship was special to me and all, but it really was nothing compared to my last (but I have yapped about that so much in various threads that you probably all know that by now).

 

[Aj Harold]

Online relationship is very useless unless the couple know exactly everything truth about each other or have met each other in person!

 

[Azire]

I believe that they can work. It all depends on the situation. I personally would never get in one if there wasn't any chance of ever meeting. I think any distance beyond what you can drive in a day is doomed to fail unless that distance is only temporary.

Being a veteran I have had my fair share of long distance relationships some of which started online. One relationship comes to mind that lasted about a year and a half. A girl actually worked with my mother and my mother sort of hooked us up. We started talking online and then texting and when I went home a couple months later on leave is when we actually met for the first time.

They can work I believe but the personal interaction in person has to happen eventually. To comment on what some people have said here, if you met someone on a site like this that is great. You are already starting with knowledge of how each other spend their free time. If you're anything like me then Pokémon is like your dirty little secret. It definitely isn't something I bring up when I meet girls at the bar/club lol.

I don't see why something like this couldn't work out even from a site like this. Of course we should be be sure to check the age of the person we're talking too. Maybe something more will come, you don't know if you don't try. Obviously nobody comes to a site like this looking for love but if you find it, good for you.

 

[Honest]

Online relationship is very useless unless the couple know exactly everything truth about each other or have met each other in person!

Your former argument... do even couples in real life know every fact about one another? Maybe an incredible amount, depending on how intimate they are, but to know every single detail, ehhh. The latter is just not true, for some people anyway. Watch the movie Her that came out. It provides insight on what a relationship can constitute, me thinks.

 

[Yukiyo Kayume]

I do not think they can work out, of course there is always the exception to the rule. Most of the time, I think they will end in one person being very hurt... so yeah I don't think they are worth the time, effort and tears.

To anyone who pursues such a relationship, I wish you luck from the bottom of my heart and I hope you don't get hurt.

 

[starseed galaxy auticorn]

For me, it's an emotional thing. Like, I feel emotionally connected to the person I am with. I don't do well with physical contact due to my autism, so it's really hard to have a relationship in real life. I feel that the emotional connection between someone I don't have to see face to face is very helpful and less intimidating for me.

Aside from that, I believe they can work well. It just depends on how committed you are to them. In my case, I have a good reason for being in one. To me, they are very similar to real life ones. You get hurt either way.

 

[Hatsune Mika]

I never understood it either...then I fell in love with my current pair and well, the rest is history <3

Awwwwwww <3 I had given it up until you came around ^///^ I just couldn't resist and then bam, here we are making our own history <3

 

[Controversial?]

Awwwwwww <3 I had given it up until you came around ^///^ I just couldn't resist and then bam, here we are making our own history <3

get a room gawd

Haha, I could never go into an online relationship again. I'm the kind of person who really needs the intimacy, so an online relationship just wouldn't work. :P

 

[Sheep]

My only two relationships have been online. The first one we were naive 16-17 year olds who thought everything would be perfect and we'd be living together within a few months somehow despite my having to go to college and of course that didn't work out, especially since I was in NYC and he was in Alberta, Canada. Too much of a distance. He ended up getting bored and leaving me before we even reached one year together. Needless to say that broke me for years and I was scared to date again.

Met another guy four or so years later, again online, and we've already reached our 2.5 years of being together. He was someone I'd been speaking to for a few years prior so we already knew each other well enough. We've already visited and I'm going to go see him again next month so things have been going great. I trust him much, much more than my ex and there's so much less of a worry when I'm graduating soon and can see the light at the end of the tunnel. :) Both of us being in the US helps quite a lot since it's easier to reach each other!

 

[Crunch Punch]

Dunno man, I never really "got" online relationships. I never really understood how a person can love someone else online just by seeing their persona online. I would need to meet the person, see how they are in real life to really get any kind of intimacy with them. Online personas are just "personas" for me; the person on the opposite side could be very different in real life. Maybe it's fear that's making me skeptical but for now honestly I commend anyone who is trying to keep a relationship just from an online meeting. I mean I know we have things like Skype, but in that respect I would feel either one in the relationship would get bored of the other just because of the lack of actual contact.

Again, I really dunno since I've never really been in an online relationship but I can never see myself being in one either.

 

[Blastin'Tyruntz]

I had some online relationships, not on PC but still. They all start platonic FYI. Things roll and from there...the rest is known. I do gotta say i love the 'pair' thing because it shows how much people can really connect here. I think i'll put myself out there haha LOL.

 

[CanalavesHermit]

I'm currently in a 7 year relationship and am engaged to my fiancee who I met over the internet. I at least wasn't really looking for love, but we got chatting, we got along really well and it...just blossomed from there. I found myself buying a ticket to see her not long after.

There's no way it really begins, it just..happens. I don't really see why someone would get so appaled by an online relationship personally. It's everyones choice who they wish to go out with.