It could be much worse!!!

[viridian doubletongue]

I'll just chop down the tree for you.

I'm staring into the eyes of a rabid rottweiler.

 

[Weatherman Kiyoshi]

Sick em' boy!
*Rottweiler eats you*

I'm being chased by a vampire!

 

[Tbone2356]

Human...Meat...

Ill just cover you in meat sauce....

Help!! I Am A Human That Was Captured In A Pokeball By A Kidnapper!!

 

[Weatherman Kiyoshi]

*takes poke'ball away from kidnapper*
*Throws in lake*
*poke'ball gets eaten by sharpedos*

Help! People are shooting staples at me!

 

[viridian doubletongue]

*Takes their staple guns away*.. *Gives them real guns*

I've just tripped onto a pit of spikes.

 

[Weatherman Kiyoshi]

*drops hammers in pit as you fall*

Help! Evil lawn nomes are danceing around me in circle!

 

[T3h BOB]

*dances around you in circles as well*

OMG! I'm dead!

 

[viridian doubletongue]

.. I'll chop you into pieces & feed you to a pack of hungry pigs.

I'm £420,000,000 in debt!

 

[Kiriri]

You could be owing your whole life. D:

I got knocked down by a car. Eep.

 

[Weatherman Kiyoshi]

I'll just derect somes planes on you too.

Help! A huge pact of deranged Totodiles are chasing me!

 

[viridian doubletongue]

They could be Croconaws.. *Uses water stones on them all*

I've only got 2 minutes to live.

 

[Weatherman Kiyoshi]

I'll speed that up for ya!
*throws man-eating carvana on you*

Help! I guy pushed me off a airplane and it's only 5 minutes before I hit
the ground!

 

[viridian doubletongue]

I'll just fly into you with another plane.

I've just had a short drop & am about to have a sudden stop.

 

[T3h BOB]

*puts cushion under sudden stop* There ya go! *discovers that cushion is full
of miniature chainsaws that have been turned on* Whoopsies... Heheh...

OMFG T3H WORLD ISH OUT 2 G37 M3H!!! ;o;

 

[Weatherman Kiyoshi]

What? oh well, becuase I didn't understand what you
were saying, I'll guess I'll just shoot you.
*takes out gun*

OMG! MY eyes are bleeding!

 

[viridian doubletongue]

I'll just pour some good old H2SO4 in there.

I'm lying in the middle of nowhere with a cellphone that has no credit.

 

[Klonoa]

Atleast you arent standing in quicksand oh yeah you are!
I missed a DDR arrow.

 

[Tbone2356]

I Peed....

Now Your Dance Cordinator Is Murdering You (For Being Off Beat)

Oh No I Peed On The Carpet!!! And Dads Coming Home!!!

 

[viridian doubletongue]

I'll burn the carpet so nobody can tell.

I've just broken my leg & I'm stuck.

 

[Weatherman Kiyoshi]

I'll just go get some hungry bears.

Help! I didn't read a map and I'm lost!