• Our software update is now concluded. You will need to reset your password to log in. In order to do this, you will have to click "Log in" in the top right corner and then "Forgot your password?".
  • Welcome to PokéCommunity! Register now and join one of the best fan communities on the 'net to talk Pokémon and more! We are not affiliated with The Pokémon Company or Nintendo.

One Latias (PG-13)

txteclipse

The Last
2,322
Posts
16
Years
  • Also, as far as your grammar is concerned... It helps to build good proofreading skills, but don't go pressuring yourself on other people's account. Some critics here may seem a little fanatical about the usage of good grammar and spelling, but just take their advice for future reference and rewrite things only if they don't seem to sound right to you. If you get into a hype over it, you'll only drive yourself nuts in the end. And, honestly, its stress you really could do without, especially considering how this is only fan fiction.

    I second this. I probably would be a prime example of someone that focuses too much on grammar while writing, and you can see the effect it's wrought on my production time (how long has it been since I updated E.C.? A month? More?). I feel like everything has to be perfect, when it's the story itself that really matters. So don't worry about it too much...you can always go back and fix the little things later.
     

    POKEMON_MASTER_0

    caffeine 1mg/mL, 240 mL po q4h prn fatigue
    88
    Posts
    15
    Years
  • I've been a bit busy lately, so I haven't had much to write or post. It's been so long since I wrote the last chapter that I fear that I may have lost a few readers.

    I'm beginning to consider making a messaging list, since the time between chapters may be substantial. I don't want readers forgetting about the fan fic between these times. So, I'd appreciate it if you'd tell me whether or not you want to be messaged when a new chapter comes. I don't think that there's anything in the rules against creating a messaging list, but if there is, please enlighten me. That aside, here's the next chapter:






    CHAPTER 5: Ascension​

    They pounded down an empty hall, heavy footsteps behind them. They didn't dare turn around for fear of coming face-to-face with the revolver. In minutes, the corridor would be flooded with students making the transition to their next class. The two could guess that the guard didn't want to be seen with a gun in hand, walking behind the two teens.

    "Where are we going?" Nadroj croaked. He still clung to Latias's side, drawing support from her able body while feeling a warm, moist substance on his side. The sweat from her drenched t-shirt had managed to find its way into his own.

    "I do not believe that I am at liberty to discuss that," the guard replied flatly, from behind.

    "Darn it!" Nadroj thought anxiously. It felt like they were descending deeper and deeper, and any break they could get had become less and less probable. "There must be something, there has to be something!"

    "I think there might be," Latias replied, amber eyes darting to his. "It's…stupid but…"

    His green eyes were locked with hers, hungry for an answer. She had committed herself to a response.

    "We're fleeing the country," she stated.

    "What?" he shot back, not entirely sure that he had heard her correctly.

    "We're fleeing the country. You said that if we ran from the Elite Guard, they would catch up with us but if we leave the country…"

    "We'll be outside of their jurisdiction! But wait…that-that's like leaving behind everything," he reflected crestfallenly.

    "Yes, but do you want them to lock you up for the rest of your life?"

    "No, of course not. There has to a better way though. I mean…there should be, right?"

    Latias flashed him a somewhat bitter look that seemed to say, "I don't know. You tell me."

    "Right, right," he thought in recognition.

    "Who's your employer?" Nadroj stabbed again at the guard.

    "Again, this is something that I am not at liberty to discuss," he replied in the same flat voice.

    "Then what are you at liberty to discuss?"

    "Ah, we are here," he replied with a tinge of complacency.

    "Huh?"

    Nadroj shot a glance to his left. Imbedded in the wall was a solid wooden door: the entrance to the principal's office. His preoccupation with the matter at hand had distracted him from his surroundings. Of all places, he had managed to turn up here.

    The guard stepped forward and turned the heavy bass knob. For the first time, they were able to clearly view the implement of death that he held in his free hand: a compact, shiny, black handgun. All the more affirmation of this situation's gravity.

    The two were shoved into the room and the door was swiftly slammed shut behind them. Before them sat a desk that appeared to shield the girth of a rather large, blue-suited man with fiery hair and traces of a mustache of the same color.

    Nadroj's heart skipped a beat.

    "That guy…he's an official who's in charge of a governmental division that investigates Pokémon-related crimes," he thought quickly. "He's always in the news."

    "And the guy behind him?" Latias questioned, thoughts laced with anxiety. "He's another one of the Elite Guard?"

    Nadroj's heart sank. It was indeed another black-clothed, sunglasses-clad guard.

    "One in, one out," he thought.

    "I think I know how to deal with it though…I think. First, we should probably find out what they want. Who knows? Maybe we're just paranoid and they aren't trying to lock us up."

    "Hope so," he replied grimly.

    "Me too."

    The red-haired man looked at them from deep, round eyes whose gaze was surprisingly sharp: observant-looking, even.

    He extended a pudgy hand and motioned for them to sit on a couch that was adjacent to his desk. The two sat hesitantly, stirring up a fine cloud of dust that glittered from the dim light. All the while they watched the guard behind him, waiting for him to make a move.

    "Now…I am a man of action rather than words," the official barked more as an imperative rather than a declarative.

    "I'll just get right down to it. We know what you can do," he said, emphasizing each syllable while leaning forward intently. "You are psychic." A triumphant smile played across his face. Nadroj and Latias were already beginning to hate this man.

    Nadroj began to respond, "We-we're-"

    The man shook his head. "No need to explain. The entire incident was caught on surveillance tapes. However…"

    He pointed a pudgy figure at Latias.

    "We cannot seem to find you in our records. We ran you through the entire government database and it turned up no matches. This is…unheard of, to say the least."

    "What?" Latias thought in confusion. "Government database-"

    "It's a system. They can run a picture of any person's face through it and get out potential matches of people who live in Fortuna," Nadroj thought hastily.

    "And what if a bunch of people have similar-looking faces?"

    "I don't know…What do you think we should do?" he asked, changing the subject.

    "Don't know for sure yet, but-"

    "I'm here to make you an offer," the official interrupted their mental conversation. "You are both…objects of interest. We would like to see to it that you are…taken care of properly."

    "What about the guy who attacked us? Is he an object of interest?" Nadroj countered swiftly.

    "Yes, actually. He's a member of a certain group. We do not know much about this group other than the fact that a few of its members seem…psychic."

    "So you're saying that we're members of the group?"

    "No of course not!" the man snapped. "Why would he have attacked you if were on his side?"

    Latias watched the debate intently. She could sense the man's anger starting to boil. His face had taken on a light-red hue and his intense gaze had become a glare. She was not sure what to think. Would this help their chances of escape or worsen them?

    Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flicker of movement from the guard behind the man. Her gaze darted in the opposite direction to sight another guard standing next to the door: the same one that had escorted them to the office. Why did he enter the room? Wasn't he standing outside a second ago?

    Without a second thought, Latias grabbed Nadroj's arm and dove to the floor.

    "What the-"

    "Close your eyes!"

    He squeezed them shut and witnessed the red flicker a brilliant white. Just as quickly, they flew open again. Latias seized both of his hands and pulled him to his feet.

    He did a quick three-sixty and cast his gaze upon two lumps of black-suited guard, and a portly official slumped over his desk.

    She grabbed his hand and spun him around to face the couch. Imbedded in its front were two gleaming, silvery objects: needles.

    "I saw the guy behind him pull out a gun," Latias thought, voice wavering in excitement.

    Nadroj beheld the scene before him: needles in a couch, three unconscious men, and a Latias. It was at that moment that a realization hit him: life would never be the same again. Not after meeting a Latias and not after engagements with government officials. No longer was he the innocent, ignorant kid whose primary activity was attending school simply for the purpose of attending it.

    "Nadroj?"

    "I-I…" he averted his gaze downward and shook his head in exasperation. "We're screwed! Sure we can try to flee, but there's no way we can outrun them! No way in the world!"

    "Are you sure about that?" Latias asked with gravity.

    "What? What do you-", recognition had washed over him: the Pokémon had yet another surprise to pull out. "What is it?"

    "I'll explain on the way there," she stated, moving to the door and heaving it open.

    The two bolted down the hall at full-speed. Thankfully, the bell still had yet to ring. The halls were silent, save for their pounding footsteps and a pulsing of blood at their temples. At each new corridor that their path intersected, they expected a black-suited man to jump out, dart-gun in hand. Thankfully, none came.

    "We're flying," Latias stated, grabbing Nadroj's hand and directing their charge up a flight of steps.

    "You-you're kidding," Nadroj stuttered.

    "I am not. I can hold you, I'm sure of it," she stated confidently.

    "You'd better be able to," he shot back.

    "I will, I will," she assured. "That balcony, where was it?"

    "Your left, that way!" Nadroj exclaimed with a nod down an adjacent hall.

    In the distance loomed a wall of glass. They were mere feet away from freedom. Latias lunged at a door and pulled the silver handle. Nothing happened.

    "It was open before," she huffed as if it were more of an annoyance than a genuine problem. She stepped back a few pace's length from the door and examined it critically.

    "Get behind me," she commanded in a whisper.

    "You're going to blow it off its hinges?" Nadroj demanded as he ran for cover.

    Latias didn't reply. Instead, she closed her eyes, planted her feet firmly, loosened the tension in her shoulders, and straightened her back.

    "Ok…" Nadroj thought to himself. "Any explosions, any-"

    An awful grinding noise rang out, prompting him to cover his ears. A millisecond later, the unhinged door fell outward with the simplicity of grass being blown in the wind.

    Latias rushed through the opening, with Nadroj following, stepping around the fallen door and broken glass. Dizziness prevailed as he glanced at the collection of shards on the deck: all angled toward the sky, all reflecting the same white light.

    "You're absolutely sure about this?" he murmured.

    "I'm sure, but not absolutely sure."

    He grinned ironically. "I like your confidence."

    "Yours too," she replied with her own smile, only to realize that he was shaking like a leaf. "It isn't that bad," she added softly. "You'll see. I'm going to transform. You'll want to close your eyes."

    He did so. Once the white faded from the fleshy red, he opened them. Floating just inches off the ground was the red and white dragon: yellow eyes conveying a quiet sense of urgency to him.

    "Your pack…I think that it'll just weigh us down. We don't need it."

    He threw the backpack to the ground without a second thought, happy to be fifty pounds lighter.

    He strode to her side. "How do I-"

    "Just get on like you would a horse. Make sure that your legs are wrapped around both sides and that they aren't pushed against the spot where my wings sprout out or the stubs in front where my claws are. They have to be right in-between."

    Tentatively, he grabbed her upper neck with both hands.

    "That's fine. Now just swing yourself over," she assured.

    "…Good, good. You shouldn't slide around too much. My fur isn't that smooth. Still, you might want to wrap your arms around my neck."

    He sat astride on the Pokémon. Beneath him was a warm, soft mass of red and white. Somehow, the two were floating.

    "This is…interesting," he thought nervously, scanning a horizon beyond the balcony, composed of treetops. To him, this was like nuclear fusion: seemingly-impossible, frightening, and yet strangely enthralling. Although sitting on the dragon Pokémon's back would seem to suggest that he was the driver, he knew the stark reality: he was only along for the ride.

    Adrenaline pumping, ears ringing, he heard her utter the unappreciated words "They're coming! I can hear them! Hold on!"

    "But I-"

    The stable mass beneath him lunged forward; he gasped and grabbed its neck for support. He looked down and realized that they were no longer hovering a few inches above a concrete surface. Instead, they were four stories above a grassy yard.

    Latias weaved furtively through a spider web of tree branches and leaves. Nadroj could feel her body working with the swiftness of the air: twisting, diving, rising. All of this just to avoid a collision. Every breath she took was deep, with a sense of purpose. She was a machine.

    The sunlight flickered, sometimes blocked by foliage, sometimes not. As a result, everything was obscured. He could see the branches, but their exact shape and position were not clear. He pressed his legs to her side and gripped her neck, praying for his life's sake that she had better vision then him.

    Despite the pounding of his own heart, Latias's words were still fresh in his head. Who was coming? Going against his best instinct, he shot a glance backward. Through a patchwork-quilt of leaves, he caught a glimpse of a mob of black-suited men standing on the now-distant balcony. In the group's midst were several glints of light. Suits were not made of reflective material, so it had to be-

    "Shoot!"

    "What?"

    "Latias, are you-"

    The air above their heads was pierced by a deafening boom. Instantaneously, the smell of sawdust reached there nostrils.

    "Are you invisible?" Nadroj shrieked.

    "I wasn't, but I am now!" came the hasty reply. "Almost there…"

    [FONT=&quot]They burst from the foliage. Nadroj closed his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. No more gunshots, no more tree branches. They were safe, for the time being, at least.[/FONT]
     

    txteclipse

    The Last
    2,322
    Posts
    16
    Years
  • The red-haired man looked at them from deep, round eyes whose gaze was surprisingly sharp: observant-looking, even.

    I'd replace "from" with "with" here. Otherwise, it looked fine.

    It was a fine chapter, although it was slightly dampened from the fact that I knew what was going to happen. The quality from the re-write atoned for that for the most part, though.
     
    Back
    Top