So, how do we see each other...

[Legobricks]

These kinds of threads make me think about what is apparently the 'typical' young male attitude toward girls and women; I find it rather bewildering.
It's like they're thought of as some sort of different species; bit like "I held a rabbit, it was so cute!", compare that to "I sat next to her, she was so pretty!". And there's this seemingly predatory way they seem to be spoken of; your 'typical' schoolboy doesn't have a girlfriend, no, he got a girlfriend.
As I say though, I find it somewhat bewildering and maybe it's not correct, so would like a share of opinions on the matter. This goes the other way too... I'm completely unaware of how girls think of boys and men; they're apparently less open about it.

So everyone, what are your thoughts and experiences about how the people in your life treat their counterparts of opposite gender?
Here's hoping this thread turns out alright.

 

[Murmansk]

These kinds of threads make me think about what is apparently the 'typical' young male attitude toward girls and women; I find it rather bewildering.
It's like they're thought of as some sort of different species; bit like "I held a rabbit, it was so cute!", compare that to "I sat next to her, she was so pretty!". And there's this seemingly predatory way they seem to be spoken of; your 'typical' schoolboy doesn't have a girlfriend, no, he got a girlfriend.
As I say though, I find it somewhat bewildering and maybe it's not correct, so would like a share of opinions on the matter. This goes the other way too... I'm completely unaware of how young girls think of boys and men; they're apparently less open about it.

So everyone, what are your thoughts and experiences about how the people in your life treat their counterparts of opposite gender?
Here's hoping this thread turns out alright.

I think there's a very unfortunate mindset that exists on many levels of society. Do x receive y. I mean this in a sense of no meaningful long term benefit. I should really find a better way to express it, but I'm really talking about a sort of mindless foresight. Always expecting the same outcome from everyone. Take person out to dinner; receive reward. There's a social norm that places intercourse on a type of pedestal of status. I've noticed at many points that having intercourse is seen as something to brag about; and this outlook has always existed in societies throughout history. Meaning that this situation isn't a new thing. It's still promoted to an extent, you know? However none of this operates in pure absolutes.
As for a deeper personal experience. There was one time I spoke with a friend of mine and he inquired to me about any recent interactions I had with women. I told him I had a few friends and that we liked to talk with each other about certain things; to which he said, "What's there to talk about?" To which I answered, "Oh, sometimes I talk with them about economics or history (yes, yes, I know how it that makes me seem), sometimes about video games. The usual stuff." Generally this friend can have quite the negative outlook on women.
It's too bad when we view each other as eternally separated by our bodies rather than finding similarities that let us bond with each other, but hey, that's up to the individual. People who want to find friendship and common interests among members of the opposite sex and treat them as fellow human beings simply will.

 

[Synaesthesia]

It's simply a double standard. Nowadays, guys who have lots of sex are players and are respected, even admired. Girls who have lots of sex are humiliated, condoned as sluts. It's sad, but true.

That's why this 13-year old boy is so proud of himself, proud enough to make a thread on a Pokemon forum about it. Because he knows that not only is he ahead of the game in his school, but he's ahead of the game on the forums, man. Kid's gunna get laid. And all we fellow Pokecommunity-ers can do is wish and admire and bask in his skills to pick up the women.

 

[Timbjerr]

I was definitely different from most guys my age (I later realized it was because I'm asexual altogether) in that the only thing I wanted from a pretty girl in high school was to talk to them and be friends with them. Relationships and sex never really appealed much to me. :/

I have to say though, there are a lot of people out there that are simply an embarrassment to my gender, making us look like shallow horndogs all the time. I've even had a (male) boss that would tell me and my other (male) co-workers in confidence what kind of kinky sex he and his fiance would have that night under the assumption that we cared. >_>

 

[Rapidash]

Ugh, boys.
That's pretty much my take on the matter...

 

[Percy Thrillington]

That's why this 13-year old boy is so proud of himself, proud enough to make a thread on a Pokemon forum about it. Because he knows that not only is he ahead of the game in his school, but he's ahead of the game on the forums, man. Kid's gunna get laid. And all we fellow Pokecommunity-ers can do is wish and admire and bask in his skills to pick up the women.

You gotta be kidding me, right? White knights get nowhere when it comes to boogeying down with the ladies.

 

[ThatKidMike]

White Knights are some of the saddest people around.

Also, that kid was simply making a pseudo-bragging topic for some reason.

Anyways, this topic is pretty much on point. Men instantly become primitive when woman are involved in a scenario, to the point where they resort to violent actions to protect them or harm others. Its like that basic animal instinct kicks in around woman.

 

[Aether★]

Despite my age, I don't have those kind of situations. Of course there are many nice girls in our school, but...
I'm not very interested about opposite gender. I must admit, that sometimes I feel lonely.
It doesn't mean that I would be a loner for the rest of my life, however there is a possibility for that... For someone it can be funny - a 19 year old, who aren't interested into women/girls that much. Ones would say - "nerd", "no-life" (with this second statement I would agree). I must say something - you're wrong. I translate my passions, study and earning money over interesting in women. I'm too wretched for that. Not to mention I'm just very shy and don't know exactly how to talk with opposite gender. I can have girls as colleagues, with who I would sometimes talk about stuff and smoke cigarette, but that's all. I don't feel ashamed for that. Majority of men in my age can't find a girl/woman for themselves.

 

[ThatKidMike]

Despite my age, I don't have those kind of situations. Of course there are many nice girls in our school, but...
I'm not very interested about opposite gender. I must admit, that sometimes I feel lonely.
It doesn't mean that I would be a loner for the rest of my life, however there is a possibility for that... For someone it can be funny - a 19 year old, who aren't interested into women/girls that much. Ones would say - "nerd", "no-life" (with this second statement I would agree). I must say something - you're wrong. I translate my passions, study and earning money over interesting in women. I'm too wretched for that. Not to mention I'm just very shy and don't know exactly how to talk with opposite gender. I can have girls as colleagues, with who I would sometimes talk about stuff and smoke cigarette, but that's all. I don't feel ashamed for that. Majority of men in my age can't find a girl/woman for themselves.

Surprisingly this isn't that uncommon. Theres a lot of examples of people translating sexual energy into other facets in their life.

My Psych teacher isn't married and hes like 60 something, but hes one of the most interesting and one of the most funny dudes I've met. He chose not to get married, even though the option was out there, he just felt he didn't need to do it. And he seems happy enough. Interesting, but true.

 

[Kura]

To be honest, some women are much more disgusting than men. Have you ever seen some raunchy bachelorette parties?! Jeeze.. :/ I'm sorry but I don't see how horribly lewd things can be used to celebrate anything.


It's not "What do boys think about girls?" sort of question, and nor is it "What do girls think about boys?"
it's a "How do you treat people of the gender that you are attracted to" sort of question.
And no one here would HONESTLY tell the truth, or they'd get more "self righteous" members telling them how to live and what's proper. Which is all fair, because people have the right to inform or defend what they think is right or wrong.

That's just what I think.

 

[Ayselipera]

Maybe I'm just a verbally abusive young lady, but I tend to say around the same things about guys. Although that's really just for laughs. I know people are people no matter who they are and everyone deserves respect. I just feel the need to not always be so proper.

Why girls take it more offensively then guys or why it seems that way I don't know. Since everyone has their own reasons for these situations. I guess I just don't take things as offensively as other people do. I don't know, maybe I'm too lenient.

 

[Esper]

There's no real difference in the language used (get a boyfriend/girlfriend) that I've ever noticed. It seems like a case of intensity and an awareness of when it's permissible and when it's a good time to stop. [generalizing] Boys grow up having a harder time talking about things and being open with each other so they put on the macho guise because to do otherwise would make them confront their feelings and that can be frightening to some so they back away from it and resort to objectifying people instead of sympathizing or relating to them. [/generalizing]

 

[devilicious]

I've always been bewildered by that, too, and never really understood it.

I think it's a wrong and outdated way of thinking about others, to be honest. I think the problem lies in the fact that everything today is much sexually tense- all teenagers think about is "hooking up", "getting a girl/boyfriend" and "sex" (not saying every single teenager is like that, of course, so don't throw stones yet), so when someone who is a candidate for any of those activities this is what happens.

But that's just what I think. My college class is very gender biased and I never had problems with interacting "neutrally" (should we call it that?) with the opposite gender, so I don't have any experience to talk about this topic.

 

[Melody]

There's no real difference in the language used (get a boyfriend/girlfriend) that I've ever noticed. It seems like a case of intensity and an awareness of when it's permissible and when it's a good time to stop. [generalizing] Boys grow up having a harder time talking about things and being open with each other so they put on the macho guise because to do otherwise would make them confront their feelings and that can be frightening to some so they back away from it and resort to objectifying people instead of sympathizing or relating to them. [/generalizing]

I'm not a typical guy in that respect. I tend to put more interest in trying to understand the opposite gender instead of objectifying them in any way. x3 What baffles me, is not too recently, I've had a girl tell me that some girls enjoy being objectified. I couldn't tell if she was kidding either, so I feel as if the guys are not always guilty of just objectifying them. If the girls are sending mixed signals, how can we comprehend them?

Though I've always tried to be as gender neutral in my behavior towards the girls as possible, and most of the girls I've been around react to that as if I'm being cold and indifferent to the, when in reality, I'm actually observing them and trying to understand them. At times I feel like I have to build my "feminine intelligence" up enough to interact with them. Maybe that's weird or something but that's how I've always been.

I will say it's true that us guys have to throw up that "Macho" exterior in order to be accepted in society, much like girls feel the same pressure to dress up and behave in "feminine" ways, to be accepted in society. Guys have the same pressure to fill out the gender stereotype that society has cast upon us, as girls do. Not all guys are horndogs, and the ones that really are...they are that way because that's the only way they were taught. They literally did not get the memo about "Being who you want to be, and Being Yourself".

I'm sure this is equally true of girls who are overly feminine in personality and appearance or are just so overly promiscuous that they're labeled a '****' eventually. They weren't given the choice, they were just told what to be by society.


If anything is to be blamed for both genders having negative attitudes about one another, it's Society in general. No one ever takes the time to sit young children down and tell them to be what they want to be, they just tell them what to be. Parents are guilty of this especially, because even though your parents do love you...the choices they make for you, as well as the way they act around you, it essentially helps to form who you grow up to be, and if they don't challenge you to think about what you want, are they really helping you to grow into your true potential? I think not.

What is the most depressing thing about that fact? It's that generally, parents DO WANT to help their child grow into their true potential, and grow into what they want to be.

Still, I will say that some parents are guilty of steering their child away from things they don't want their child to be, even if it's completely obvious that it is exactly what they are, and what they want to be.

 

[Banjora Marxvile]

Everyone who I class as a friend on here and in real life treat both genders the same, as far as I can tell. As in, no sexist remarks (well, little accidental ones, mostly about our own gender), and yeah. I try to be one of these open people, who don't care about religion or gender, but about the personality more. Only 1 "friend" of mine is truly sexist, but not many people like them that much, and he does bug me a bit.

 

[Timbjerr]

I don't know how many people saw this thread before it was closed, but I figure I could use it in this thread. I'd like to believe that the OP there was a troll (albeit not a very good one). Chalk it up to my history on 4chan, but I'll admit to jokingly saying things like that, even in the company of girls. Most girls catch on and laugh it off and those that are as internet-savvy as me will jokingly play along. XD

Out of curiosity, what's your opinion on comments like that, whether they're made jokingly or not?

 

[GFA]

Ask my pants. JK.

Not really sure what this thread is asking. Women are women, men are men. People should be happy to be happy, I don't get what's wrong with saying he "Got a girlfriend." The dating game is a game of cat and mose as it is. Who the cat is and who the mouse is depends on the couple.

 

[Rogue planet]

There's idiocy from both genders I think, although it seems it's more prevelant in males. Either way I just see humans rather than "males" and "females", billions upon billions of festering, irritating humans.

what are your thoughts and experiences about how the people in your life treat their counterparts of opposite gender?

All but one of my male friends have been in one of two categories: A) They objectify females. B) They're completely awkward. The one guy that acted normally with them was gay. Female friends never tend to be open though (probably because I'm male myself) although I know that quite a few of them enjoyed trying to make boys lust after them, probably for the attention.
I've always been neutral myself; being raised solely by my mum and having a lot of female friends growing up probably contributed. So I think a big factor on how people view the opposite gender is what ideas are put in their heads by their parents or friends when they're kids.

 

[txteclipse]

For some reason I get along just fine with both guys and girls. The only people I don't get along with are people who are excruciatingly shallow, in social tastes or otherwise. So eh.

 

[Murmansk]

You don't have much to worry about so long as you view other people as simply being... people.
That's been my plan and so far it has worked out pretty good, everyone seems to like it.