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- Seen Jan 4, 2013
Not sure whether or not you're asking for help, but all of the above (minus all things romantic) is where I'm at. Coming from a small, conservative town, 100% of the people I've met have been selfish and/or dense. (Looking back, I can't tell you how I made it through all those years of dealing with those people. Of course, I did have numerous breakdowns where I resorted to being completely antisocial for a day or so. Which made me look rather silly, in retrospect.) I just moved, so I've cut off all communications with my previous "friends." Not sure what adjective I'd use to describe that decision (immature/selfish?), but I'm a bit happier without them. I also just stumbled upon a volunteer opportunity, which leads me to the topic of world suffering. What goes on in the world is horrifying, and there is only so much one can do. Obviously, there's no compensation for volunteering (though it can get you a job sometimes), but the experience is certainly gratifying. If you're really passionate about helping those facing serious adversity, I'll suggest the Peace Corps, which is where I'm hoping to end up in a couple of years.I don't have too many problems weighing me down or anything, and they're certainly no match for some of the stuff other people in the world have to deal with. Classes are tough, sure, but I can deal with that. I'm short on cash, but I'll manage.
I'm more worried about crap in general. People are starving everywhere, losing homes (or homeless), diseased, killing each other, etc. Not to mention there seems to be a significant lack of depth to about 90% of the people I meet. I mean, they're good people, sure, but it's as if everyone these days is completely hedonistic and cares for nothing other than their own happiness. Other people matter too; that's how we got this far. A corollary to that is what I perceive as a death of affection; sure, people hang out and some are even in sexual relationships, but none of it seems real to me. Meaningful relationships (both friendships and romantic ones) seem like a thing of the past, and that saddens me greatly. Who am I to judge, though? It's just this sort of thing kind of nags at the back of my mind; I rarely think about it, but it's always kind of there in the background.
Edit: I said "minus all things romantic." The only reason ~love~ is not an issue for me is because I choose not to get romantically involved with people. The reason for that is, like you said, genuine affection seems to have died. I don't trust that anyone will share those special feelings with me, and I'm too afraid to open up to the idea. I've been through rejection...it's not fun, though I'd like to pretend that the realization that "the feeling isn't mutual" doesn't affect me.
My motive for responding was to give you advice...but I think I just sort of rambled into a TL;DR about myself. o.< Sorry about that. It's hard to give advice when you're struggling with similar (though somewhat minor) issues. Perhaps seeing that you're not alone will be a little relieving.