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I hate having one pokemon more than five levels higher than another pokemon. I keep my guys balanced by switching my pokemon around every time the one in the lead levels up. I keep my levels in check by grinding to the same level as the next gym leader's weakest pokemon right before taking on the gym.
I try to balance my Pokemon by having one of them gain a level, then the next, and so on. So my whole team will go up one level, then I will begin the process again. I never let there be more than a three-level difference between any of my given team members, unless I am specifically training a weak Pokemon.