I'm kind of late to the thread, but...
- Honesty/trust. I think a relationship doesn't work without either of these things. I don't want to be with someone who's "brutally honest" either, mind you, but I feel like a lot of problems in relationships happen because people don't trust each other enough and don't talk things through. Speaking of trust, I
really like being with someone who trusts me enough not to get jealous over me talking to other guys/girls. I get that some people are insecure, but it's specially jarring because I don't fall for people easily and I don't even like to be in relationships for the sake of being in them either.
- Treating me like a person. Complimenting my looks is nice but complimenting my personality or achievements makes me feel even more appreciated. I don't want to be treated as someone's Manic Pixie Dream Girl or "trophy girlfriend", I want to be equals (yeah, this is mostly aimed at guys, sorry). Bonus points if they also accept my flaws and don't idealize me. Like... I'm far from perfect. Part of loving someone is accepting their flaws because everything else about them makes up for it. I just don't like it when people put me on a pedestal or obsess over me because they're in love with an idealized version of who I really am. It's objectifying.
- Being understanding and patient. I'm kind of a high maintenance girlfriend and I know it can be hard to deal with me (I even get annoyed by myself sometimes). Having someone who not only accepts my "uniqueness" but is also willing to put up with the bad stuff is something that means
a lot to me, even if we're not always on the same page. I always try to be patient and understanding with my partner so this one is kind of a big deal.
- Kindness in general. This one is less about me and more about how they treat others. I feel a little uneasy when I'm with someone who's super nice to me but isn't as kind (or is a jerk) to other people for no reason. I think you should treat people the same way you want them to treat you, and someone who is respectful, polite, and just a good person overall regardless of who they're talking to, is someone I'm
at least willing to spend time getting to know better. I can overlook someone's "average" looks, but I can't look past a questionable personality, no matter how nice they are to me.
It may sound weird but my main requirement is that I can count that person among my friends: that I can hold long chats with said person, that we have some similar interests and so on. I want that, if the passion ever fades out, I can still have a good friend.
(That also means that anyone I consider my friend is free to hit me up and there's a pretty good chance I'll reciprocate the attention)
I was gonna write something like this for my 5th point, but I'll just quote you since I like the way you put it :)
There are a lot more things I look for in a partner, but these are the most important to me
and I've already typed too much :x
