What did your Pokémon REALLY tell N?

[Avishka]

In Pokémon Black and White, after beating the Mistralton Gym, N confronts you and demands to see your Pokémon and talk to them, because Pokémon never tell lies. Inevitably, it ends up that your Pokémon says something good about you.

But, do you think that's what REALLY happened?

This is a skit-based game where the object is to post what you think the Pokémon really said to N, and to rate out of 10 what the previous poster posted. You may deviate from the plot of the game if you like. You may even substitute your trainer for another trainer. Just, don't go crazy about it okay?

Rules:
1 All PC rules and Pokémon Trivia rules apply.
2 No spam, off-topic posts, or flaming of the users.
3 No foul language, and no censor bypassing. If the word looks like this: ****, or this: d*mn, It is not aliowed.

Well then, I'll start.
N: Victini, please talk to me.
Victini: Well, I spent most of my life alone and trapped in a room on an island with no one to... Oops. Uh, I mean, my trainer is from Nuvema Town and...
N: *facepalm*

Now, the next poster rates mine out of 10 and posts their own for next person.

 

[Skystrike]

i guess...9/10? XD

N: Emboar, please talk to me.
Emboar: FD is such a good trainer. He cherishes me, praises me, gives me rare candies, etc; ..What? Were you expecting me to give out his personal information? :P

 

[Hikamaru]

7/10

N: Oshawott, please talk to me.
Oshawott: I am famous for being a mascot of this one PC user called Hikari10, she treats me as "top percentage in cuteness". I respect the fact I am so cute and what, you know what she hates?

 

[Sayan]

7/10, I guess?

Here's the conversation between N and my superficial Snivy.

N: Cute little grass snake, talk to me.

Snivy: Ah, so you're N. Just N? Is that your real name? OMG, is that your real hair!? I mean, I understand you're probably obsessed with me and my green skin; but please, don't make it so obvious! I mean, I know I'm the absolute epitome of elegance and sophistication, anyone would kill to become like me. I mean, just look at me, I'm perfect! OMG, look at you! What are you wearing? I mean, I see at least 30 disturbing abnormalities in your dressing style! I mean, not everyone has as much fashion sense as me, but that doesn't mean...

N: Little snake, you have opened my eyes! I have changed!

Snivy: Does that mean from now on you're not gonna were second hand hippie clothes and wigs made out of tall grass?

N: No, it means I have changed my perspective of the world and my aim in life. You have made me realise how evil the world can be. So from now on my only aim would be to destroy the world!

Snivy: That's it? I mean, I thought you'd undergo some actually significant changes...

 

[Hikamaru]

8/10

Nice one Sayan!

N: Elgyem, tell me why you are cute?

Elgyem: Hikari10 started loving me cos of that guy Marriland, she even calls me cute.

N: Who is this "Marriland" guy?

Elgyem: He used a member of my species in his Pokemon White video playthrough, nicknamed her "Wylia".

N: Is it true that someone calls you a real alien?

Elgyem: No, I'm just a Pokemon.

 

[Sayan]

7/10. And I think this thread needs some more love.

Here's what my Conkeldurr and N had to say to each other-

N: Hello there, mighty looking Conkeldurr! Tell me, what exactly are you doing?

Conkeldurr: CONK SMASH!

N: Oh, I see. Tell me some more about yourself; for instance, what're your hobbies?

Conkeldurr: CONK SMASH!

N: Very interesting. I also like to do that sometimes. Tell me more. What's your aim in life?

Conkeldurr: CONK SMASH!

N: Whoa, you're pretty ambitious! You must've dedicated your entire life to it! Tell me, according to you, what is the meaning of life?

Conkeldurr: CONK SMASH!

N: Astounding! I always thought it was 42, but you have given some extremely valid reasons to support your arguement. It's always nice to be able to share opinions with a cerebral individual like you, but now I must go. I have to release all my Pokemon without getting whited out, go to a certain pre-determined next place, catch new Pokemon from the surrounding area, and practice my predetermined dialogues. Being an NPC/villain/plot device hybrid is a lot of hard work, you know! Ok then, I'll get going.

(Puts his hand forward to shake hands with Conkeldurr)

Conkeldurr: CONK SMASH!

N: Gee, thanks! I always wanted to get some of my finger bones dislocated.

 

[Hikamaru]

5/10

Here's what my Chandelure said.

N: Chandelure, tell me about yourself.

Chandelure: Hikari wanted to train me cos of my might Sp. Attack stat and nice abilities.

N: So that's why she trained you?

Chandelure: Yeah, I will burn and steal the soul of abusive Trainers.

N: Please don't steal my soul!

Chandelure: Don't hit me physically! I have Flame Body.

N: Thanks anyway and I might see you again.

 

[mineox100]

5/10

N: Tell me about yourself, Hydreigon.

Hydreigon: RAWR! My nickname is Roar!

N: Alright... Roar, how does your trainer treat you?

Hydreigon: He gives me Pokeblocks for food, he also let me destroy anything that is from Team Plasma!

N: Uh oh...

Hydreigon: Not now! I haven't had lunch yet!

N: Phew...

 

[Loner_grunger]

N: Tell me, how much does this wrecked human make you suffer?
Samurott: Huh? Are, are you talking.. to me?
N: Yes; you poor opressed soul, tell me of the ominous tortures this human applies on you!
Samurott: Dude... don't you have something better to do? I mean, you look like 25 and yet you're talking to a kid's pokemon... don't you have a girlfriend or a job??
N: ERM... I... I see, this terrible human has corrupted your heart, so you're mean and ..
Samurott: No, dude. I'm happy. You're the one with problems, talking to pokemons and stuff. You should visit a shrink or something, seriously.
N: ... *ok*

 

[echolocated]

9/10

That was pretty mean, lol

Here's mine!
--------------
N-Tell me, what does your trainer do to you?

Emboar-He lets me watch ponies!

N-What are these "ponies" you speak of?

Emboar-Y-you don't know what ponies are? I'LL CRUSH YOU INTO THE GROUND!!

N-Ok, ok! I know what ponies are now, just please let me live! I need to be at the endgame!

 

[Hikamaru]

10/10

Very funny.

-------------

N: Gothitelle, tell us about yourself.

Gothitelle: My Trainer Hikari loves my psychic powers.

N: I don't get why she preferred you over your rival Reuniclus.

Gothitelle: She liked my look better.

N: And is that why Hikari got recognized by Reshiram rather than Zekrom?

Gothitelle: Yes, cos she loved Black's version exclusives better.

N: Did you know about Hikari's derpface avatar?

Gothitelle: I don't give a damn.

N: Well, it was nice speaking to a real Psychic Pokemon.

 

[Avishka]

5/10
---

N : Magikarp, what do you think of your Trainer?
Magikarp : I swear to God, when I evolve, I'm gonna kill you all.
N : That's not what I'm talking about, Magikarp. What do you think of Andy?
Magikarp : Yes! I'm evolving!
N : Oh no.
Gyarados : Die, stupid N!
N : (runs away like a baby)
Gyarados : Take THAT, sissy!

 

[Porynoir]

7/10

N: How has this trainer treating you?
Porygon-Z: BZZT!
N: Wut?
Porygon-Z: BZZZZZZT!
N: I know your a computer, but you can't even talk?
Porygon-Z:BZZZZZZZZZZZZGET A LIFEZZZZZZT!
N: Umm... thanks....

 

[Hikamaru]

10/10

So hilarious!

Now, here's what N said about my Sawsbuck:

----------------------------

N: Sawsbuck, tell us about yourself.

Sawsbuck: I was trained by Hikari to learn about my different seasonal appearances.

N: Why do you have pink flowers on your antlers right now?

Sawsbuck: It's currently Spring in Unova.

N: Are your flowers turning into green leaves next week?

Sawsbuck: Yes, cos it's June next month and in the Unovan calendar, that's Summer!

N: When I see your seasonal forms, it's almost like real nature!

Sawsbuck: Yeah, that's what you see coming from a Grass Pokemon.

N: Well, it was nice speaking to a Pokemon that understands the seasons.

 

[mineox100]

5/10
___

N: Tell me about your trainer, Purrloin.

Purrloin: He let's me steal stuff from people!

N: That's... illegal!

Purrloin: Isn't what you're doing illegal?

N: Um...

Purrloin: Bye!

N: Okay... *checks pocket* Hey! Give me back my Zekrom!

Purrloin: Told ya I steal stuff!

N: Grrrr...

 

[Hikamaru]

7/10

Now, here's one involving my trusty Manectric that was part of my very first team back in my days of Ruby.

------------------------------------

N: Manectric, tell me about Hikari.

Manectric: I was one of Hikari's first Electric-types that she trained.

N: Are you a boy?

Manectric: No, I'm a girl! Hikari used to only catch female Pokemon unless if they were male-dominant species.

N: You actually were on a team that had 2 Water-types and 2 Grass-types?

Manectric: Yeah, Hikari chose me based on my appearance and my cry.

N: So it was not Wattson that inspired Hikari to catch you?

Manectric: Yeah, it wasn't Wattson. Hikari just felt Manectrified.

N: Well, thanks. Not every day I get to speak to an Electric-type.

 

[Limanya]

Lol. 10/10!

N: Beedrill, please talk to me.
Beedrill: my traiiner ha2 been teachiing me p2ychiic move2.
N: Why do you talk like that?
Beedrill: becau2e of a webcomiic called home2tuck. ii'm forced two talk liike 2OME character who liike2 bee2. probably the rea2on why 2he cho2e me.

 

[TheFinalBrandon]

8/10

N- Patrat, how is Brandon like?
Patrat- My nickname is Slave. I'm pretty sure you can get all of your info from that

 

[bwburke94]

1/10 for using a Patrat in your lead spot

N and my (traded) Porygon:

N - Hello Porygon.
Porygon - 01110011011001010110100101111010011101010111001001100101
N - ??????????
Porygon - 01010011010001010100100101011010010101010101001001000101
N - I give up.

 

[Limanya]

Oh my god. (You should use Porygon-Z though. Those things are BEAST)
8/10

N: Beedrill, Phione, please talk to me.
Beedrill: why 2hould ii talk two you.
Phione: Sollux, please!
Beedrill: they're ALIIENS, ff.
N: So your name is Sollux, then?
Beedrill: ye2, he'2 2ome hacker guy from a webcomiic called home2tuck.
he liike2 bee2 and ii2 ob2e22ed wiith biifurcatiion. ii'm forced two talk liike hiim.
N: And who is that Phione?
Phione: I'm F----EF---ERI! Glub!
Phione: )(ee)(ee!
Beedrill: the 2ame goe2 for her.
Phione: I'm named after a fis)( girl in t)(at same webcomic!
Beedrill: we have two 2tay twogether becau2e iit appear2 we have a relatiion2hiip iin that webcomiic.
Phione: And i must say, i like Sollux!
Beedrill: 2he'2 pretty niice two.
N: So you have to be 'twogether' at all times?
Beedrill: yup.
Phione: Y----ES!