What does it mean to be a man today?

[LoudSilence]

Being a slightly effeminate gay man with a playful nature, I rarely get confused with a "man's man."

Not to pick on what you said but since you mentioned it, you've brought an interesting point to mind: what is our definition of femininity and masculinity to begin with?

Everyone here seems to be talking about defying "set" gender roles and what have you but there seems to be some innate understanding of "man" and "woman" (beyond biological differences) -- you point this out yourself by calling yourself an "effeminate man". How much of this understanding is instinctual and how much is cultural?

Whatever our answer may be, I think our obsession with political correctness has muddled what exactly it is we're fighting for in the first place.

 

[El Héroe Oscuro]

Just thought I'd share this documentary trailer considering it relates a lot to this discussion. It looks into masculinity itself in young kids and how it's forced on them. I honestly can't wait for the documentary to come out, it seems very interesting to a growing issue in our society.

​

 

[Dakotah]

Not to pick on what you said but since you mentioned it, you've brought an interesting point to mind: what is our definition of femininity and masculinity to begin with?

Everyone here seems to be talking about defying "set" gender roles and what have you but there seems to be some innate understanding of "man" and "woman" (beyond biological differences) -- you point this out yourself by calling yourself an "effeminate man". How much of this understanding is instinctual and how much is cultural?

Whatever our answer may be, I think our obsession with political correctness has muddled what exactly it is we're fighting for in the first place.

The concept of the roles of the sexes is purely cultural. When I describe myself as a slightly effeminate man, I do so inaccurately, because I am not of the belief that any single label can accurately describe a person. Or even a set of labels for that matter. However, because we as humans are always looking for patterns in things, we tend to ascribe certain attributes to ourselves to help others understand us.

It's really all a matter of perception, I think. Both how we perceive ourselves and how others perceive us based on our mannerisms and outward appearances.

 

[zakisrage]

Being sensitive doesn't necessarily mean being submissive. When I characterize men as "sensitive," I think of them as individuals who are mindful of the opinions of women, their feelings, etc. to a slightly higher degree than normal men would. That's not saying that men cannot be sensitive or they're completely insensitive, but, in my opinion, there are a handful of them who disregard the perspectives of women. Sensitivity is honestly greatly appreciated regardless of gender, I think, because you're showing that you appreciate others' feelings and treat them with delicacy depending on the situation.

I actually think it's a good thing for men to be sensitive and men should respect women. But I don't like men who let women control every aspect of their lives.

 

[OmegaRuby and AlphaSapphire]

When it comes to gender I think one should let a child play as either the traditional forms, or otherwise. I don't think it's good to restrict a male child or a female child from playing a certain way, or acting a certain way simply due to their biological sex.

Also...I've noticed that this question tends to be asked about men a lot...but not so much on what it "means to be a women" is talked about.