1,000 Ways to get Kicked Out of Walmart [v.2]

[Fernbutter]

1446

Walk into the store, stand on something, preferably a table, then whip your head back and contort and flail your arms around, then stop, whip your head back and make the biggest creepiest smile ever and say "THE ANTICHRIST HAS RISEN."

*watch all the people flee the establishment*

 

[Vapo41]

1447

Walk into the store handing out advertisements and mini models of K-Mart and Target to the employees.

 

[Fernbutter]

1448

Walk in, then take and cover yourself with as much food products as you can.

 

[bitelaserkhalif]

1449:Chase your Pet while you grief the Walmart around of store

 

[Kung Fu Ferret]

1450. Go to the jewelry section and quote Gollum from LOTR. "My precious"

 

[Sonata]

1451:
Walk in with a newspaper filled with poop, open a food item, and drop the poop in there. Then call for the manager and complain that there is ♥♥♥♥ in your meal and you'd like a refund.

 

[UltraWing]

1452

take an empty case of a game with you. steal the keys to the cabinets and take a good game and put that game in the empty case and lock the doors and put the keys back then ask that you want a game. have the guy open the cabinets and get the game that you stole after he sees that the case is empty get kicked out

 

[isthatyoudan]

1453
Ask everyone in the store for their name (say you're from a newspaper writing an article on walmart shoppers or a census person or something). Write them all down on a piece of paper. Then, stand in the middle of the store with the list and a black notebook. Yell out, "You fools! I have the death note! I'm going to write all of your names down in this and you all gonna die!" Laugh hysterically and scribble in the notebook while being dragged out of the store.

 

[Akiba]

1454.

Lab: Get Booted out of Walmart

Materials:
5L 10M sulfuric acid (H₂SO₄)

Procedure:
Ten boxes of white Domino's sugar or other sugar of choice were taken from the shelves and emptied onto the floor. 5L of sulfuric acid was poured onto the sugar. The sulfuric acid and sugar reacted to create steam and an enormous mass of pure carbon. The experimenter was then removed from the store.

 

[Mew]

1455.
Order a Domino's pizza and lob it at a manager.

 

[Meksal]

1456
Peruse the store pushing over old ladies and stealing their shopping carts.

 

[isthatyoudan]

1457
Become "Walmart-man". Rescue people that don't need rescuing and potato-sack-carry them out of the store, and fight any "suspicious characters" (That manager looks pretty "suspicious"...) Did I tell you that Walmart-man's villain-fighting weapon is a sack of fruit?

 

[Xebelleon]

#new

get caught "upper decking"

 

[~Justified~]

(Xebelleon you didn't post the number. Just edit 1456 into your post.)

1457
Ask for directions to one of their competitors' stores, such as Target, Publix, or K-Mart.

 

[isthatyoudan]

1458
Grab a box of Depends or a similar product. Walk to the changing room, hold up the Depends and ask, "Can I try these on?"

 

[~Justified~]

1459
Sleep on some of the furniture in the furniture section

 

[Mew]

1460
Shove pictures of *insert wierd fetish you're into* into every product.

 

[isthatyoudan]

1461
Get some candy and a group of little kids. Hide candy really far back behind products on the shelves, but be careful not to drop anything. Then, tell the little kids that it's time for a candy hunt, and that the candy is hidden behind products. Tell them they are supposed to "go nuts". They will, and all of the product will be spilled everywhere in search of the candy. Laugh evilly during the hunt so the security guards will know that you're the one behind things.

1462
Stick-pocket a bunch of sausages and steaks on all the employees, and then let hungry dogs loose in the store.

 

[-Mew-]

1463

Push a shelf into another to create a giant domino effect!
You will probably get bigger consequences than just kicked out...

 

[~Justified~]

1464
Wear a blue polo and khaki shorts and pretend to be a worker on an empty register lol