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The "Infinite" "Wisdom" of Shanghai Alice

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Shanghai Alice

Exiled to Siberia
    • 1,069
    Posts
    13
    Years
    Haunted House of Onyx said:
    Okay, How do I get an attractive woman to love me?
    Click to expand...
    Wait, I think this question and the next are one in the same...


    Garouga! Bare Your Fangs! said:
    Should I go down to Florida this weekend to waste all of my money at the dog track?
    Click to expand...

    SHANGLEONE MODE.

    *Changes into a suit, and puts on a fedora*

    You got problems? Then Uncle Shanghai can help you out. For a price.

    HHoO, a little favor or two, and we'll take care of the rest. She'll practically be beggin' you to love her.


    Garouga! Bare Your Fangs! And listen to my answer.

    The dog tracks? They ain't worth your time. We fix the races, so there's no point in betting.

    The snail tracks are the smart investment.
     

    Reddo

    Happy!
    • 125
    Posts
    14
    Years
    Shanghai Alice said:
    When you think of a kappa...

    You...

    ...

    RUB IT IN, WHY DON'T YOU? OH! LOOK! NITORI'S NOT A KAPPA! SHE LOOKS LIKE A HUMAN! HAHA, WHAT KIND OF KAPPA LOOKS LIKE A HUMAN?

    I DO. You think I'm HAPPY about my appearance? You think I want to look like a human? Is that it? Do you really think I'm that dead to my emotions, that you can make fun of me at your leisure?

    Listen here, human. I might not like your kind in Gensokyo, and I might try to avoid physical contact at all costs, but...

    YOU MESSED WITH THE WRONG KAPPA.
    Click to expand...

    To Nitori: Oh! Sorry! I didn't mean to offend you! I said it so naively...

    To Shangai Alice: Will she forgive me someday? =)
     

    Åzurε

    Shi-shi-shi-shaw!
    • 2,276
    Posts
    15
    Years
    • Seen Jun 2, 2013
    Shanghai Alice said:
    ...why not?

    Even though that excuse is worn out, it's still good.

    [/Tollbooth]
    Click to expand...
    Ah! One of my favorite children's books of all time. OF ALL TIME

    Garouga, you should start hitting on a random forum member, but if you suspect them to be a boy, pretend they're a girl. Or vice-versa. And link me to your conversations.
    <.<
    >.>
    <.<
    /slinks off into obscurity
     

    Shanghai Alice

    Exiled to Siberia
    • 1,069
    Posts
    13
    Years
    Garouga! Bare Your Fangs! said:
    Who should I creep out
    shamelessly flirt with
    express my undying love to shamelessly flirt with?
    Click to expand...
    Shanghai Alice's Paid Dating Service is now open.

    ...but not to you. You should shamelessly flirt with...

    AZURE! GET IN HERE!

    Reddo said:
    To Nitori: Oh! Sorry! I didn't mean to offend you! I said it so naively...

    To Shangai Alice: Will she forgive me someday? =)
    Click to expand...
    No, she probably won't. Nitori gets angry very easily.

    She's also hiring Rika to work on the Flower Tank Mk II Project, so... you're dead.

    Åzurε said:
    Ah! One of my favorite children's books of all time. OF ALL TIME

    Garouga, you should start hitting on a random forum member, but if you suspect them to be a boy, pretend they're a girl. Or vice-versa. And link me to your conversations.
    <.<
    >.>
    <.<
    /slinks off into obscurity
    Click to expand...
    ...oh, wait, you did get in here. Much love and thanks, Azure. That's what I pay enslave you for.
     

    Shanghai Alice

    Exiled to Siberia
    • 1,069
    Posts
    13
    Years
    Pokestick said:
    Arisu, why am I typing so fast that I get my title more often than I don't?
    Click to expand...

    Because the Pokestick is actually a Pokestick of +666 WPM.

    You've used it too often, so you now type at 666000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 WPS.

    You're a monster.

    Please try again in 44.9999999999999999999999999999999999999993 seconds.
     
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