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Things you don't say to a cop.

Etneri

New dude
46
Posts
19
Years
    • Seen Sep 26, 2009
    "Can you hurry up and right the ticket, your wife is waiting on me.."
     

    Deadly Aim

    Seth Wayes
    77
    Posts
    18
    Years
    • Drunk: "Ta Name ish John Koo Pahplic(John Q. Public), Ahm dwonk ahnd ahm Wihh tah golvahmint."

    *flashes badge that isn't real and collapses on the officer drooling on him*

    Cop: *rolls eyes* "ehh, yeah Marty, its him, alright. Geez, and the feds hired you to protect our country... I'm quivering with chilliness... WOO!"

    (skips off to corner and comntinues chilliness*
     

    Spectrum

    In need of an oil change
    7,400
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • Abskull said:
    Mr. Officer Man, *blinks* I gonna f**kin' kill your little f**kin family if arrest me, b**ch!
    Click to expand...
    ... Lol in a can right there. :P

    'Let's try this one more time. I did not leave the drugs at home.'
     

    Esupio

    4,419
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • right you see that dude over their yeah he told me that speed cameras might be a health hazard and he said that I shoud hit it and reverse back over it and save peoples lives

    what its odd but may work
     

    Abskull

    Link's Huggle Thing!^.^
    697
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • You want the donut? *Holds donut up high* Go fetch the donut! *Throws the donut in officer's face*

    Look! A monkey! *Drives off and hits 5 pedestrians*

     

    Tetsu

    339
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • 'Aren't you suspended for malpractice?'
    It may not seem funny to you, but yesterday I ran into a friend of mine, and he told me two of the Sparta Police got suspended for eight days for malpractice. The day it came in the newspaper was the day they got suspended. We ran into officer Hoinne (sp?) the same day in his squad car. He asked if anything was wrong and we're like "yea." and said the above line. It wasnt smart. We could have gotten a ticket for obstructing an officer, but we didn't so there-fore he WAS suspended AND impersonating a police officer.
     

    Gohan

    1,568
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • Eh I'll give it a try.

    *pokes Cop's stomach*
    I've always wondered something. Do cops like get keys to all the donut shops in town so they can sneak into 'em in the middle of the night?! I can see in your case that it's true. Doesn't your wife feel bad about being married to a **** huge ol' porker? *eyes pop out*

    Cop dude: Okay, kid. Get outta the car and walk this line.
    You: While don't you ossifererer. The beer in the car'll get lonely.

    Cop: Okay kid! The jig is up! I know you're drinking beer underage!
    You: NO! The jig is on you **** ol' cop! I know you're cheating on your wife!

    Cop: Open up the trunk kid. You're speeding and now you need to get a ticket. Plus I have reason to believe you've got illegal drugs. In the trunk.
    You: No you're wrong. The drugs are in the front. The bi***** I just killed are in the trunk. That's how I work. I fight with them for a while, then shoot 'em. It's so easy. By the way, you're wife and daughter are in there.
     
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