Hades: Well, helloooooo there! Glad to see you made it!
Pit: Hades!
Hades: Settle down there, Pitty. Ladies don't like high-strung fellows. So the "good guys" covet the Wish Seed, too. Tell me, goddess, what do you wish for? Is it all kittens and rainbows, or is it something more...interesting?
Palutena: I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours!
Hades: Thanks so much for asking! I just have one humble, little wish. You see this poor child? Both of her parents are dead. Awww... There was an unfortunate accident, if you know what I mean.
Pit: You mean you murdered them!
Hades: It was a simple case of distracted chariot driving. I shouldn't have been doing my hair. Anyway, I was hoping to use the Wish Seed to bring back the parents. Can you think of anything more joyous than a family reunion? Then after that, they'd strike it rich—like, rolling-in-dough rich. And then we'd slap crowns on all of them, and make 'em royalty! And that's the general gist of my wish. Pretty noble, and not at all evil, right? I can't think of anyone MORE deserving of the Wish Seed than yours truly.
Palutena: Let me get this straight. You, the lord of the Underworld, want to revive the dead. That's somewhat at odds with your "mission statement," wouldn't you say?
Hades: Don't tell me the goddess of light hasn't heard of altruism before.
Pit: What a load of baloney!
Hades: My intentions are pure. As lord of the Underworld, you have my word.
Palutena: That just makes me more suspicious.
Hades: How cold of you. Your words pierce my heart like an icicle.
Pit: But this is Thanatos's third time around!
Hades: Thanatos is a bit of a special case.
Pit: You're telling me.
Hades: He IS the God of Death after all. So he gets free perks like evil powers and health insurance... and free soda.
Hades: Whatever. We'll just keep fighting without someone out there giving orders.
Palutena: Are you saying it makes no difference whether your troops have a leader?
Hades: They're all idiots. Seriously, I don't even know if any of them have actual brains.
Hades: Morning, do-gooders!
Pit: Don't tell me you two are behind this!
Hades: Sadly, no, though I do applaud any and all violence directed at you.
Pit: Hey look, an Exo Tank!
Hades: Hey look, who cares?
Viridi: Hey! am I the only one paying attention here? Look! Those Aurum "troops" are just rip-offs of Underworld enemies!
Pit: What?!
Hades: I gotta hand it to them; those are some pretty decent knockoffs.
Viridi: First they devour planets, now they're copying enemies? Ugh. Lowlifes!
Palutena: So maybe the Treasure Boxes and Exo Tanks were also copies.
Viridi: Can't say for sure.
Hades: Full disclosure here, the Mimicuties were courtesy of yours truly.
Pit: It WAS you!
Hades: What? Don't you like presents, Pitty Pat?
Hades (imitating alien voices): We are from outerr spaaaaaace...
Palutena (sarcastically): Yes, yes, you're hilarious.
Viridi: Look! The Chariot Master has an Exo Tank!
Pit: Maybe he's a gearhead.
Hades: Or a nerd.
Viridi: Now what do we have here?
Hades: It's time for my minions to do their thing. Underlings! I'm offering 100 gold for the putz's head!
Pit: The name's Pit!
Hades: Yes, I know. Your tenure as a ring doesn't seem to have had any effect on that keen wit of yours.
Pit: Wait, you know that I was turned into a ring?
Hades: Oh, is it a secret? Then don't mind me. Mum's the word!
Pit: Did YOU turn me into a ring?
Hades: Wow, you really are clueless. Don't you know, Pit? You're the cause of all this chaos.
Pit: Whaaaaat?! That makes no sense!
Viridi: Don't let him get to you, Pit. The Underworld Army is the one to blame.
Hades: Why, thank you. That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard you say.
Viridi: You know what? You're annoying.
Hades: Yow! She's feisty! Wear gloves with this one, minions!