Why is socialization so important?

[Yusshin]

Your case is different, you went through many hardships and according to what you said, you're antisocial now. It's not like there's nothing about personality wether you are extravert or introvert. Anyway, you can always look for another professional for therapy if you feel the need, it's not because you've seen a bad one that every psychologist is like that.

I was considering seeing a different one. Even my outreach teacher mentioned it to me. I'm very sociable with people I know well, though. It's hard for me to talk to people, make friends, and just plainly be myself. I'm different from other people, and I don't handle criticism very well. In fact, if I'm criticized gravely, I'm more likely not to improve, but to have my already next-to-nothing confidence extinguished completely. I was raised to believe that I wasn't allowed to make mistakes; even though now I believe different, it's very difficult to change what's been implanted into my mind for fifteen years. Heck, I would've committed suicide at fourteen following my having cut my arms with a random piece of beer bottle I found outside had it not been for a certain someone entering my life for good.

Exactly! I was essentially in the same boat as you Yusshin, for a while and I still am. I'll admit, life has gotten better as of adulthood (18+) but that's because life in general isn't like school...and even High School was decent for me.

I didn't have bad parents perse, but my mom was a total loser and my dad ended up raising me and my brother. I was somewhat lucky in the respect that I had a little brother...it helped me loads, because I had to teach him things and help him come to terms with things, as he's helped me come to terms with things sometimes.

Life has gotten better for me, too, but my psychology is broken completely. People scare me. Dealing with money scares me. Being in a group and not knowing anyone scares me. Working independently at a job where I can't ask questions if I'm in doubt scares me. Society scares me. People think I'm a wuss, but I can't help it. I try to mask it, though :| Some people actually believe I'm very sociable, but they're confusing that with my talking to people I know well. When it comes to meeting new people, introducing mysef, interviews, working, school, etc. I'm like a six-year-old with a gun capped at their head.

I've tried to change, too, but it's just too difficult .-.

I sound like a complainer now lol Wonderful >>;

 

[Melody]

I was considering seeing a different one. Even my outreach teacher mentioned it to me. I'm very sociable with people I know well, though. It's hard for me to talk to people, make friends, and just plainly be myself. I'm different from other people, and I don't handle criticism very well. In fact, if I'm criticized gravely, I'm more likely not to improve, but to have my already next-to-nothing confidence extinguished completely. I was raised to believe that I wasn't allowed to make mistakes; even though now I believe different, it's very difficult to change what's been implanted into my mind for fifteen years. Heck, I would've committed suicide at fourteen following my having cut my arms with a random piece of beer bottle I found outside had it not been for a certain someone entering my life for good.



Life has gotten better for me, too, but my psychology is broken completely. People scare me. Dealing with money scares me. Being in a group and not knowing anyone scares me. Working independently at a job where I can't ask questions if I'm in doubt scares me. Society scares me. People think I'm a wuss, but I can't help it. I try to mask it, though :| Some people actually believe I'm very sociable, but they're confusing that with my talking to people I know well. When it comes to meeting new people, introducing mysef, interviews, working, school, etc. I'm like a six-year-old with a gun capped at their head.

I've tried to change, too, but it's just too difficult .-.

I sound like a complainer now lol Wonderful >>;

Well, in your case, it is indeed wise to find a professional who can indeed help you with your problems. I know I was lucky, ultimately so, because my nature simply did not permit such damage to my psyche. I always sought second opinions, as it's my personality trait to do so. Now, I may not always take the second opinion so well, but I do analysis of it. Sometimes things which are shot down by the immediate analysis, get salvaged during the postmortem analysis. (I am always analyzing things which have been discussed and decided upon already, and I'm always analyzing memories which are still fresh in my mind. Such is the essence of my personality)

With all that being said, I understand fully how difficult it can be to recover from even minor psyche damage. It's truly difficult because fear is an inbuilt survival mechanism which tends to be a ***** to override. x3

 

[Yusshin]

Well, in your case, it is indeed wise to find a professional who can indeed help you with your problems. I know I was lucky, ultimately so, because my nature simply did not permit such damage to my psyche. I always sought second opinions, as it's my personality trait to do so. Now, I may not always take the second opinion so well, but I do analysis of it. Sometimes things which are shot down by the immediate analysis, get salvaged during the postmortem analysis. (I am always analyzing things which have been discussed and decided upon already, and I'm always analyzing memories which are still fresh in my mind. Such is the essence of my personality)

With all that being said, I understand fully how difficult it can be to recover from even minor psyche damage. It's truly difficult because fear is an inbuilt survival mechanism which tends to be a ***** to override. x3

Sometimes, I value certain opinions above others. If my father tells me I'm a total idiot, ignorant, and retarded, and then turns around and calls me something nice, I'm more prone to ignore the nice and absorb the hate .-. It's very unhealthy. I also feel that if someone close to me compliments me, it's an "obligation", and not something they do by will. That's why sometimes I value what random people say to me over what close members tell me, unless it's hurtful. If it's hurtful, I give close people more importance.

I don't know why I developped into thinking like that, but it's really bad. I don't know how to change it, though. I've tried and tried, and I'm afraid that a psychologist will just try to tell me something that I know is wrong, like last time.

The only psychologist I know that would accept me freely has a huge waiting list. I don't know what to do @-@ I'm moving soon, too, and I don't know how I'm going to continue with a psychologist if I start over here in the first place...

Meh... Thus, I'm a prime example of the importance of socialization :| Don't socialize, and you'll become a fearful mouse like me ><

 

[Melody]

Indeed you are. However, fear not, you'll be able to get professional help quickly I believe. It's a matter of faith really. If you have Hope, you cannot be quenched. :3

 

[FaithInMe]

Having social interaction IS a necessary part of life.
It creates necessary social skills that are needed for survival.
Put it this way, if you're going for a job, particularly something team based, sales for example.
You could have the best sales record in the world, you could be so good you could sell rubbers to a monk, or ice to an eskimo, but if you dont have the skills to be able to interact with people, and someone else does, you have no hope.
No job, no money, no survival.

That is of course but one example. Just off the top of my head.

I personally have never had any of these problems, I was always one of the popular kids all through my schooling. I have tons of great friends, some I see more than others.
I go out, party and do things with groups of people all the time.
It helps that I happen to be overly extroverted though I guess.

 

[Fxcking Tatertots]

Also, you could've just blocked that guy from Facebook instead of disabling your account. He probably wanted to harass you like that and I think you should've just stood up to him by blocking/ reporting him so that HE gets kicked off or banned from Facebook :/

Just my two cents.

I actually de-friended the guy first, then decided it won't work that way and just disabled the whole thing, as there is a bunch of bitter-tasting fish in the sea. I just didn't want to deal with **** anymore. I've been feeling a bit better since I've disabled it, so yeah.

To everyone else, thanks. Don't know what else to say, since it will probably some out wrong.

 

[Neil Peart]

I can simplify this all - if you like being alone, it's not the duty of ANYONE to say you're going to turn out this way/that way. Leave these people alone.

 

[helix]

Can anyone honestly say that there was not a point in their life when they were happy to make someone else happy? One socialises because they wish to connect themselves with the animated, living world around them, and perhaps they give the slightest darn about the people they talk to.

Either way, socialising has merit, allowing one to share knowledge, ideas and expressions with others. But chaining yourself to your social life until all you care about is your interconnection with it is like being in an abusive relationship with the entire world around you and letting them push you down. And those who do choose their social life over themselves as individuals until they lose touch with who they are.. I feel for them.

Not to say I'm so established and whole in myself as a person that I could be a hermit, that is. But I've already decided that if I was ever supposed to choose between my relationship with others and my personal individuality, I would choose myself.