View Full Version : YUGIOH frontier

January 2nd, 2005, 7:27 PM
Chapter one
Flamedramon, warrior of fire

Ashley ran as fast as she could. She couldn't believe she was going to be late for something very important. Ashley had gotten a message on her cell phone. It said for her to be at domino city train station at 6:30 PM on the basement floor.
As Ashley ran through the city, she noticed a boy and his father playing Soccer. Then, the boy kicked the ball into the street. Ashley, being as kind as she is, went into the middle of the street, and kicked the ball back to the kid. The kid said thanks. Ashley just smiled. Then, she noticed a truck come by. Luckily, the truck stopped before it hit her. Ashley sighed.
"Are you alright kid?" the guy in the truck asked. Ashley shook her head. Then asked what time it was. "It's 6:26." The guy answered. Ashley gasped, the started running as fast as she could to Domino train station.
In about a minute, Ashley had gotten to Domino train station, the got her ticked and made her way to the elevator.
Once she got to the elevator, she noticed the door starting to close. Ashley jumped into the elavator. She had just made it. On the elavator, the noticed a boy. He looked just like Seto, except with green hair and yellow eyes. He was humming the song 'Girl you shine.' Ashley was about to say hi, until the elevator came to a screaching hault. "I've got to stop hitting my head." Ashley said. Then, she noticed she was in the basement. In the basement, there was, what looked like, train type creature there. She also noticed that people were going on them.
Once she snapped out of zonning out, she noticed the trains were leaving. She gasped, then jumped onto one of the train creature. "Wherever i'm going, it must be importat." Ashley mummbled to herself. Then, she entered the door that lead to that lead into the train.
Once she got inside, she noticed three boys. She reconized the brown haired one. His name was Seto. He was in her classes in school. But, she didn't know the kid sitting next to him.
"Well look who we have here. Another person goin' to da same place we're going." Said a boy named Joey. Ashley just looked at him."Don't be so mean Joey." Said the yongest kid.
"Well, let me introduce myself. The name's Ashley." Ashley said. The boys looked at her.
"My names Joey. The brown hair kid is Kaiba. an the little kid sitting next to him is his brother, Mokuba." Joey said. "I already know who kaiba is." She said.
"I-I didn't want to come here." Said Mokuba. Everyone looked at him. "I was pushed on here. I really didn't want to go. They forced me to go." Mokuba said again. Everyone ignored him.
Then, the train came to a screaching stop. Then, the doors opened. With that, Seto, Mokuba, Joey, and Ashley saw these mini digimon called Chibimon. They all said hi. Then, left.
The kids took their first steps into the digital world, and noticed how beautiful it was. How green the grass was, how the trees were so cute, just about all the kids looked like they wanted to live in the digital world.
Their daydreaming ended when a digimon named Greymon started attacking everything. "Wheres the spirit." He was said, while attacking other digimon.
Ashley got mad, then approached Greymon. "Hey you, leave those Digimon alone! They didn't do anything to you!" Ashley yelled. The Greymon looked at her, then roared. "You can't tell me what to do. I'm here for the spirit. Now hand it over or-" Before Greymon could finish, he sensed something. "THE SPIRIT!" He was right. A bright light began to glow. The spirit was inside the light.
Greymon began to jump into the light. I'm really going to regret this. Ashley thought. Then, Ashley grabbed hold of Tyronnomon's tail, and got pulled into the light.
Everything was bright. It was so bright that Ashley needed to squint to see. Through squinted eyes, she could see a red. Then she saw Greymon. "The spirit! Nova blast!" She could hear Greymon. yelling that. Ashley stood up. She grabbed her cellphone (Which had transeformed into a thing called D-tector.) "Spirit come to me!" She yelled. With that, the spirit went into Ashley's D-tector. "It is time." The D-tector said.
A white ovel line went over Ashley's Hand. She slashed the White ovel through her D-tector. "Exicute!" She said. "Spirit evolution!" The outline of the Digimon went onto Ashley. In about a minute, Ashley was a Digimon! "*Roar* Flamedramon!" She yelled.
The bright light dissapeared. Seto and the gang looked at the new digimon that had appeared. Mokuba reconized the digimon. "Flamedramon!" Mokuba yelled. Ashley smiled.
"What! Impossible! She became the legendary warrior of fire, Flamedramon!" Greymon yelled.
"Correct Greymon. But Now, i've got a little present for you! FIRE ROCKET!" Flamedramon yelled. Two fire balls hit Greymon. Greymon roared in pain, then fell down. Greymon got back onto his feet. "So thats how you want to play it, huh? Well watch this!" Greymon yelled. "GREYMON DIGIVOLVE TO.........METLEGREYMON!" With that, a new digimon appeared. He looked just like Greymon, except he had wings, a metle pannel on his chest, and one of his arms were metle. "Now lets see who wins!" Metlegreymon said.

Will Ashley be able to beat metlegreymon? Will Metlegreymon get Ashley's spirit? Find out on the Yu-Gi-Oh: Frontier.

Next time on YGO frontier:
Joey: Wow, i've never seen a digimon as powerful as that. He knocked Ashley out with one hit.
Mokuba: There's a reason why. It's because Metlegreymon is at the ultimate level, and Ashley's just at the legendary-armored level.
Joey: Oh.
Metlegreymon: HAHAHA! I've won human, just give it up. Your spirits mine.
Ashley: *thought* I-I have to do something. If I don't, i'll lose my spirit!

January 8th, 2005, 11:44 AM
Well, I think this fic is really good so far. ^____^ I suggest you use paragraphs to separate different scenes and ideas. This makes your fic less clutered and also makes it easier to read. ^^ The plot of your fic is pretty well displayed. I like how it's a mix of the Yu-Gi-Oh! characters as well as some familiar Digimon faces too. ^_______^ Also, I would suggest making a Prolouge just so we have a better idea of what's happening, but that's just a suggestion. Here's a few spelling/grammer errors I found:

Soccer = soccer (sports aren't usually capitalized unless at the beginning of a sentence or used in a pronoun format)
the = then
elavator = elevator

Well, overally this is a great fic, keep up the good work! ^__^