Rainbow Chara X
Impossible to gauge!
- 129
- Posts
- 8
- Years
- Shiny Hunting in Sinnoh
- Seen Apr 25, 2024
A fair amount of these are bulk uploads due to how it worked back where these were originally put up. Spoiler tags are incredibly useful for this.
Future Dan Says: In hindsight, every let's play I've been doing from now on has had some gimmick going for it... I guess double-chapter uploads is Snakewood's retroactive one.
Chapter 6 - Seaside Trouble
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We are NOT messing around this update, folks.
Let's get this party started.
: "Yeah. There was a group of dragons there. Apparently they came with the zombies."
Haruko: "I knew it! I'll have to get the old anti-air gun working again. Anyway, thanks. Now, show me your true power!"
Awwwwww yeah.
Fuck the gym leader theme. This is where it's at.
It's Haruko from FLCL. And while her sprite looks a bit... sketchy, it's fine. That aside, Haruko is probably the toughest opponent you'll probably face so far and by god is the fight cool except for one last Mon. It's the longest fight so far standing at 20 screenshots.
She sends out a few fodder Mon, but don't be fooled by that Sneasel. It can Ice Punch you something fierce.
MEGA RUDE CRUDE DUDES ALERT
Absol and Luxray are the most dangerous Pokemon you'll probably have to face yet. Swords Dance Absol and the already pretty damn strong Luxray absolutely ripped apart the team in practice, which is why I had to evolve Reggie. Haruko also abuses the hell out of her Super Potion stock, so if you get these guys down to red, chances are very high that she'll just bring them back up to green.
She's smart, I'll give her that.
Oh NO. See, this was already after Absol used Swords Dance twice. It was strong enough to rip apart the entire team at its current strength and I wasn't sure if Haruko was going to use another Super Potion. So I just went with my gut.
Ace is the king of cool.
As for Reggie... you see this picture? Reggie has Leftovers, Leech Life and has poisoned the Luxray already. While not straight out brute force, Reggie essentially deadlocked Haruko's Luxray into a losing battle no matter how many Super Potions or Bulk Ups she uses.
I knew he would get a chance to shine.
The hell is a Kingma--
Say hello to another new Fakemon, folks. Kingmadio is a series of Madio-type Pokemon that do... things. I don't even know what to say about them other than "what the christ" because they're so odd.
This is its only attack, by the way. Even without Leftovers, Night Shade from this dude won't even leave a scratch. By the way, you're going to have to poison him. For you see, Kingmadio is a
/
type.
A
/
type with Wonder Guard. Which essentially means Kingmadio is immune to everything but status moves and Struggle.
CUTLERINE YOU SON OF A WHORE
At the very least you can wait for his Night Shade to run out or just poison him if you can... but really? You're going to do this? It's such a pacebreaker to what is otherwise a cool fight. It's a required fight too, so why would you just dump this ugly, nigh-invincible thing onto the player?
A millenium later, Kingmadio finally drops due to poison.
She gives us the badge, along with TM08 (aka. Bulk Up). She says she got the TM from Brawly, which is cool and all but I doubt we'll use it.
She doesn't really say much after that, but that's fine. Let's go back outside.
... Only to immediately get called by Birch.
: "Oops. Forgot to ask someone. But I did kill two dragons."
Wasn't the reason we came here to look for Landon and May? Also, no, you killed(?) one. And that was because Ambes Star Platinum'ed it to death with Ice Punch.
: "That's beside the point! Stop wasting time slaying monsters and find my daughter and your brother!"
: "Okay, okay. I'll ask around. Someone here should know something."
: "See to it that you do."
And then he hangs up. The good professor is getting a bit testy.
"Hey, have you seen my brother by any chance? He's the Pokemon League Champion. I'm looking for him."
Kid: "Oh yeah! He surfed over here a couple weeks ago now with May. Said he'd found something amazing up in the desert, and he was going back for it."
: "Thanks, brah."
[Jack is calling Birch]
: "Hello?"
: "I've got a clue of where they're going."
: "Huh? What is it?"
: "Where's the desert?"
: "Surf east, then north to Slateport. Then go north to Mauville. The desert is just up north of there."
: "Thanks." [Hangs up]
Jack, please.
Anyway, now we have to go to Slateport and beyond.
Before we go, I should take note of this dark patch of divable water. It's probably going to contain some superbonus stuff later on, so remind me if I forget.
We are immediately greeted with a swimmer guy upon entering Route 107. Although you can just surf past him, I'm going to fight him anyway. In fact, a lot of the fights here are things you have just already seen.
Tabby: "The incredible -
Simon: "Psychic-"
Tabby: "Swimming siblings!"
What.
My thoughts exactly, Jack.
There's this lady blocked off on an island. She must be very important if she gets isolated like this.
"I came here from the Johto region, but got trapped by the zombies. I have to train up if I'm going to swim home!"
It's a nice touch that she has Johto Pokemon, actually. I like that. But unfortunately no training for you.
Oooh, a destroyed ship. Let's go inside.
"But no seriously, you should leave."
... Wh... what? Isn't that the same line of dialogue from the beginning of the game? Weird. Anyway, we can't go inside.
Go over here, and you can find a... RageCandyBar?? It essentially serves as the Rare Candy of this hack, but... wow. Let's not use it just yet.
"I was a sailor on that ship what the zombies got... so I became a pirate!"
Wait just a second.
The ZOMBIES got the ship? You've already established that there are things other than zombies that can destroy things, and zombies are weak to water. So why would you... bah. Never mind. Let's fight.
Hayseus. He has like three Meowths, by the way. Nothing too special.
Okay, Jesus.
Let's have a chat with this fine fellow.
Gentleman: "Ah, a young one!"
[Initiates a battle]
He has a Growlithe, a Shinx, a Ponyta and a Raticate. Nothing too hard.
: "... But you were the one... who attacked me... Why is everybody acting so unnecessarily hostile and acting like I'm the bad guy when I beat them up in self-defense?"
By the way, medical bag. Just in case you needed a tune up. You can also find a Caramac if you go to the right.
MY LOVE IS GREATER THAN YOURS.
Now that we're actually on shore, we get jumped by this asshole.
Benedict gets another kill by themselves. They're growing up so fast.
I skipped the fight because it wasn't anything special, but this guy had a Linoone. Not fun.
And what could possibly be in the Seashore House? We already fought zombies, dragons, demons and one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
Huh. There doesn't seem to be anything in here. What's the problem?
"This child has been turned inside out, stuffed with salt, and then turned back out again. He is very well preserved."
Wha... what? How would that work? Since it mentioned salt, it couldn't have been a zombie that did it. Also, ewwwwww?
You get a Fire Stone for your troubles, though.
THE HELL?
Whoa, what? Look at this dude. He's like some deranged chef monster man. Meet the Former Chef class, everybody. They will be our enemies for Slateport and onward. And there's going to be a lot of them.
Whoa, level thirty. Munchlax here goes down without much of a fight, however. Thank you, Zagon.
Christ, do they have to shriek like banshees all of the time? I can only imagine if you heard this in real life, it would void some bowels.
[Former Chef runs offscreen at a speed I've never seen anybody go]
This is almost word-for-word what I thought when I first fought that guy.
"Wait a minute. The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse... that's Pestilence, Famine, War and Death. The only person that could have made a chef into that starved monster... would be Famine. This must be his dominion. I'd better tread carefully from here on out."
Ooooh. I like how the story is showing that each Horseman has a different kind of monster they control, to be honest. I mean, in the grand scheme of things this is probably distracting from the zombies, but I like rising threats in practically everything.
Before we go any further, let's go get a ton of soda.
Immediately upon stepping into Slateport, we get attacked by two Former Chefs. Both of them with Munchlaxes and...
Kirlia??
Why them of all Pokemon? Why not Gulpin or... another big eater type of Pokemon? But that aside, this is technically the first time you see the Gardevoir family.
That was one Leech Life. Reggie is hilariously powerful as a Parasect.
Moving on, we--
[Former Chef appears from the corpse of the girl]
Grody.
Aside from his entrance, this Chef is pretty much the same as the others.
How very Looney-Tunes-like. Also,
.
"This crate looks like it'd fall apart if bashed hard with a metal object such as an Arclight Spanner or something."
Very nice to know exactly what it is we need to break this thing.
Inside of the boat house, there's some holes on the right. There's nothing upstairs, by the way, so don't bother checking.
Sure, why the hell not.
Whoa. Where did we just wind up? It has the Abandoned Ship theme (
) playing, which is appropriate I guess, considering this place looks like it's in complete disrepair.
Gateau are the items that the Former Chefs tend to use when their Pokemon are at the red. Essentially they're Hyper Potions but with a fancy name.
Whoa, that's a funky overworld sprite. Let's go talk to that fellow.
: "Then... why are you directly confronting me?"
He has two Hombone. I... don't even know what to say. Other than that in practice, Rock Blast from this thing killed Bellamine. Which was absolutely embarassing.
Zagon kills the first one with Surf (as Hombone are
/
) while the second one uses -
Bide. No, really. Do you know what I could do in the meantime while waiting for you to use up Bide?
Bella stacks up like two Calm Minds while this dude is Biding, with absolutely wonderful results.
Like so. It's just a giant pile of dirt with a claw now. There is no coming back from that.
: ".... Yeah, sure, whatever buddy."
I don't understand how this guy does things. He wants to hide, but jumps out yelling "don't tell anybody I'm here". Like, come on.
Oh? If you guys read through Chapter 3.5 (Gameshark Fun), you'll recognize this room as a part we weren't meant to be at yet. Now we're here for real and that green-haired guy is going to talk to us.
???: "Why, you're in the SS Cangrejo, a submarine built by Mister Michaelangelo of Blue Sky Port in the Visbu region. I'm Usher, his second in command."
Cangrejo is the spanish word for crab, by the way.
Usher mentions that the submarine is busted and Mister Michelangelo doesn't want to pay repairs. Usher and his crew came to Hoenn to explore the underwater depths, but the submarine got stuck in the rocks.
: "Well, can't you fix the engine?"
Usher: "Well, our engineer could indeed fix it. But our engine room is flooded and full of nasty wild Pokemon... if you could clear them out, and also clear out the sea devils that came out of the ocean, then we can fix our engine and go."
I'm surprised out of everything Jack has seen at this point, he's scared of sea devils.
Usher: "Nope. Just jump down into that hole. That'll take you down to the lower levels."
This man.
[Jack walks to the hole in front of him and falls down a floor]
Well damn. Now we're in a brand new dungeon! But I'm afraid that's the end of this episode. See you next time on Snakewood for the ADVENTURES OF THE SS CANGREJO.
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Team setup:
(Reggie, level 25, has Leftovers,
/
) - Tripping out on congratulatory spores
(Bellamine, level 22,
) - Itching to evolve after seeing the others do it (don't worry honey you only have like eight levels left)
(Zagon, level 25, has Plus Band,
) - Staying close to Jack in this new weird submarine place
(Ambes, level 24,
) - Pondering about life before all of this zombie/demon/dragon/horseman apocalypse business.
(Ace, level 25, has Anadrin Talon,
/
) - Trying to wrap his head around new battle techniques
(Benedict, level 16,
/
) - Doing egg things in the submarine.
(Alice, level 12,
) - Disappointed that she had to go back into the box
(Tohru, Pumbloom & Ballin are all on standby)
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Chapter 7 - Nobody Expects the Hoenn Inquisition
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If this submarine has holes and it's underwater, then how the hell is it not overflowing and sink--
Oh, hey, a new part.
Go down a bit and you'll see these crates. Remember the name Angel Laboratories because I think it might be important later on. I think, anyway.
"This elevator is clearly broken. It's not possible to go any further."
Remember this too, because I know for sure it will become important later.
That's a very noticable tiling error.
"An organ of some kind floats within, connected to the base with wires."
Ugh, nasty. This also gives me flashbacks to that creepy room in the Galactic headquarters where they kept the Lake Trio.
Go down here and I recommend you get into a fight.
For you see, there's Magnemite in the water. Believe it or not, you will need Magnemite later on for something in this submarine.
I should also mention that you can get Magnezone in this hack if you give Magneton a Thunder Stone, which is something that I honestly wish they did in the real games. It would only make sense.
Anyway, say hello to Letro.
Go to the right and you'll find this computer room that has practically everything you could need at the moment. A PC for switching, a bed, the works. I would stay here to wade out the horseman apocalypse if this place wasn't so dinged up, to be honest.
There's also this doohickey. For 600 Pokedollars, this thing pops out regular Pokeballs for you. Given how this is the only place you can get some at the moment, I like that Cutlerine did this.
I also found a Luvdisc and called him Love. Because... I felt like it. This is also the last we'll ever see of him.
Also, go down south a bit and you'll find this medical kit in case those Pokemon on the water kicked your ass.
Dive Balls just in case you needed them too.
The drawer Jack is standing in front of contains the Arclight Spanner but I didn't screenshot actually getting it. Whoops.
Go to the left and you'll see this giant machine thing. It's very particular about where you try to fix it.
Alright, cool. I guess the Magnemite event isn't quite this part yet.
"Oh! Thanks for fixing the engine! I came down here to look for the Engineer, but I couldn't find him. I haven't seen anybody about lately."
: "Uh, yeah..."
What would even try to get us down here? The sea devils? If Luvdisc counts as a sea devil then
Aw sweet. Usher's not that bad a guy after all.
[Fade to black followed by teleportation SFX]
"Sorry, the teleport is a little jumpy. I'll see you around sometime!"
[The submarine moves away]
... Alright, whatever I'm just rolling with it.
We're on Route 110 and the first thing we see is a FREE PORYGON2 LET'S SNATCH IT
[Celebi cry]
"This Porygon is clearly lost. Better leave it here, as it probably belongs to someone in Slateport."
Someone who's probably dead, you dingus! Do I have to steal it away for you, Jack?!?
Feh. Let's go into the grass.
(* Disclaimer: Pichu do not appear in the wild at all, this is purely gamesharked for the sake of additional plot *)
WHOA, HELLO.
[My personal song choice for this scene: Reunion]
: ("Hey! Is that...!")
: ("W-wait... It can't be! Shine?! Spark?! Is that really you? Jack, hold on!")
: "Huh? Well... alright."
: ("Thank goodness, it IS you! Thank the lord you're safe!")
: [Both tackle hug Ambes]
: "I assume they're your siblings?"
: ("Yeah, Jack. I'm curious as to how they even... survived as far as they did, but...")
: ("I don't care as long as they're safe!")
: "Awwwww. Well, to be honest dude, this is no place to have a little family reunion. Let's wait until we get to safety."
: ("Yeah, you're right. Come on, you two.")
[The two Pichus hitch a ride on Jack's shoulders.]
[Current audio in-game: A version of the Team Rocket encounter theme]
As Jack and crew try to advance forward, they are stopped by an offscreen military march. As for the remix of the Team Rocket theme from Gold/Silver, I kinda like it.
"What was that? Sounded like a military band. But that theme song was decidedly evil... Perhaps I ought to investigate?"
Yes, Jack, let's follow the evil music. That can't possibly end badly.
They replaced the Trick Master house with a Pokecenter. That's probably the most useful thing in this hack so far.
"This Pokecenter was only just built when the chefs and zombies arrived here. I hate to think what I would've done without it."
You and me both. Cause god damn it, even with Zagon's beautiful head smashing, we get hurt way too often.
"I wish I could go home... I want to see if my parents are still alive..."
I can really get behind this sentiment. But given the situation, Jack is probably the only person that can really survive the outright horse-shit shenanigans outside.
Letro, you're cool and all, but we already have a perfectly good electric type. Benedict needs all the screentime he/she/it deserves.
[My choice of music for this scene: Going My Way]
: ("I've said it once and I'll say it again. Thank goodness you two are safe!")
: ("But what I don't understand is how exactly did you get here from Petalburg Woods? Even we had a pretty hard time trying to get here, and I'm confident we're one of the most capable teams that are still... alive.")
: ("It wasn't that hard. Well... actually, it kind of was. We just had to run away from every zombie, chef and demon we saw with Big Sis's help!")
: ("Yeah! It was pretty scary seeing so much blood and guts everywhere. But we stuck to our guns!")
: ("Big bro, do you mind if we tag along with you? We... don't know what happened to Big Sis since we split up and you're our best bet.")
: ("Wh-what? You lost Ivory?! Not only that, if it was tough for her, you do realize I probably won't stand a chance. Sure, I had to punch out a dragon with my bare fists--")
: ("COOL!")
: ("That's awesome, Ambes! You actually did that?")
: ("Well, yeah I did. It was pretty bada--")
: ("Hey, don't try to distract me! You two aren't coming and that's final!")
: ("Aw come on! You're the raddest big brother ever! We just have to come with you and Jack!")
: ("Ugh... I swear you two are more trouble than you're worth. Jack, what should we do?")
: "How about we put them in the box so they don't get hurt?"
: ("Hmm... Given the increasing amount of danger outside...")
: ("Alright, you can come. But you have to promise to stay inside of the box, kay?")
: ("Okay!")
[They both hug Ambes]
: "Alright, we all cool? Cool. Let's go investigate Slateport."
With that little (added purely of my own accord) exchange out of the way, we make it to Slateport and goddamn is the place a mess. Every house is completely deserted, including the Pokemart. The Contest Hall is gone too, but I don't think anybody was that broken up about it.
Go over to the Pokemon Fan Club and you can get a Kilin Horn, which is pretty much just Snakewood's equivalent to the Soothe Bell.
Kilin, otherwise known as Qilin, is a figure in Chinese Mythology that's recognized as a good omen. It appears as a hooved chimera-like creature with fire covering its body. Aka. badass.
Go over to the open market area, and it turns out this is where everybody in Slateport retreated to.
"The survivors are clustered here, in the market, because these monster chefs can't stand food. The smell of our supplies keep them at bay."
Okay, this is a genuinely cool idea. Because the Former Chefs stand as minions of Famine, they can't stand food. They're anti-chefs. This weakness also doesn't completely cripple them like the zombies because unlike water and salt, food eventually goes away.
Not only that, the chefs are nightmarishly fast and strong...
"This uniform? It's the Hoenn Internal Affairs Army uniform. I'm a soldier you see."
If Hoenn had an army and the zombies are weak to water, why couldn't they just shoot saltwater at the zombies fire-hose style and bottleneck them that way?
Oh right yeah this is Snakewood, don't think too hard about it.
"N-no, I'm not stealing the supplies!"
This guy is probably going to get everybody killed. Karma works in mysterious ways, dude.
"I need a powerful Pokemon so I can get out of this city. If you have a Faceleech, would you like to trade? I can give you a Munchlax in exchange. After all, it's useless..."
I would if I could, but I just can't. Also, Faceleech?
Oh, this is where the Name Rater wound up. Cool. I'll probably need him in the future for some re-naming.
side talk: I don't understand why you can't just freely nickname your Pokemon. Why does a crusty old guy have to decide it for y... never mind.
The Energy Guru here will sell you Snakewood's version of the EV increasing nutrients. Only they're all candy. I would do this, but a competitive team in a hacked game is rather unfeasible.
Here's a chef, but he has the usual. When you beat a Chef that's not critical to the story, they just run away.
This guy's in trouble, though. Let's save him before he gets munched!
More zombie twins. Ugggggh.
They have Charmeworm and Shrivelsaur like would expect. However, the only reason I'm showing this fight off is because they have a "brand new" zombie Pokemon up their sleeve.
Oh and this too, because that's pure garbage.
Ohhhhh dear god.
Our favorite deformed Jynx and... Electabugs. The puns don't stop getting any dumber. But don't let his name fool you - Electabugs is a bonafide badass. His Thunder Punch is the equivalent of getting your face smashed in with Thor's Hammer. Believe me, it's not pretty.
Thankfully,this attempt around, the team managed to take them out relatively painlessly.
This man thanks you for saving his life, but he doesn't give you anything in return.
: "It was nothing, dude. Everybody gets one."
This is what's over here, by the way. It leads back to Oldale... and honestly, I'm not quite in the mood for backtracking.
Back on Route 110, we get jumped by a survivor.
R-Rockit!? His name is really Rockit. Poor bastard.
Name aside, he didn't have much to offer in terms of a fight. But apparently he came across the evil military crew too.
In the grass ahead, I caught Krusha and Cherry. Because trust me, they will prove incredibly useful later on.
Plus I like Bellossom.
Future Dan: Wow, this has to be the most wrong I've ever been considering they're one of the few Pokemon I have that don't even make it to the end of their own respective game. It's not that big of a spoiler, to be honest.
Wait what? The guys with the funny hair are the Inquisition?!
These Inquisition Footmen have the Magma/Aqua Boss theme playing like they're SERIOUS BUSINESS, too.
Sadly though, he only has a Hombone and two Nosepasses. Which is almost alarmingly inappropriate for a theme as BADASS as the Magma/Aqua leader theme.
These Inquisition guys all look like purple-haired Lances to me.
"Oh... What should I do? I ought to tell the boss I failed, but I don't want to face her wrath... I guess I better just stay here."
You know, given your Pokemon set-up, that's actually a very smart idea.
Huh? Look to the left. It's that Charizard again... who is also blocked off by a Rock Smash rock. We get rockblocked at almost every turn, have you noticed?
Keep these coming.
But I was the one who talked to you. I would have slipped by if it wasn't for the fact you had a new Pokemon.
It's Lunatone. Not that it's hard or anything, but I should mention that these things legitimately creep me out. The evil red eyes and the eerie droning cry they make have haunted me ever since I first saw them in vanilla Sapphire.
Was he stopping us just so we don't get hurt? I appreciate the thought, guy, but--
Oh god damn it.
Nanab berries? Well, sure, but I don't imagine Pokeblocks being that useful.
Yeah, okay, whatever.
He has a Graveler of all things. It's not that much harder than a Hombone considering they both have the same type, but what the hell.
This guy should have known that part of the set Linoone can learn is SURF or that there are Water Pokemon everywhere. Although, how a giant raccoon can just spontaneously summon a river's worth of water is beyond me.
Hey, there's one of my favorite songs again! As for Mauville, I like the redesign it got in ORAS a lot more than the original. Although the lack of ease for egg grinding annoyed me quite a bit.
"It's a corpse. Its head has been completely reversed and filled with sand from the ears. There seems to be no reason to this."
I like how even the game is acknowledging that this is getting really dumb. Also, this guy has nothing for you to loot, so move on.
There IS a working Pokemart here, though. Thank the lord too.
"Well, well. I thought you might make it this far, Jack."
: "Oh! Gleis! What are you doing here?"
My exact question.
It better be cool.
[Gleis and Jack walk towards the front of the Pokecenter]
Those weird overworld sprites are Hombone, by the way. Also, the zombies are attacking with Zigzagoon which are not zombie Pokemon in this game.
[Current audio: The Team Rocket theme again]
: "Oh, so you've met them before? They're the Inquistion, part of the Hoenn government. Since the zombies came and the government was eaten, they are more or less in complete control of the region."
: "But it seems like nobody's in control here. Even these guys are fighting for dominance."
[Gleis makes us invisible. A lady accompanied by two zombies come in from above and... clip through three of the NPCs in front of them. Whoops.]
[The grunts put the Hombones back into their Pokeballs]
Guys, why do you have Hombone? There are much better Pokemon you could be using right now.
[Flash of light followed by Rock Smash SFX]
Whoa. She just transitioned them out of existence! That's neat, actually.
???: "You! Minions! Return to base."
[The Inquisition members leave to the left. The zombies head up to the north. The Mauville theme starts playing as normal again.]
: "That was Chloe. She' s a Taoist, just like me, and so she has power over the undead monsters that have recently sprung up. Those two zombies that were following her were her personal slaves."
Honestly, it's cool to see more Taoists than just Gleis.
"Aren't you Taoists a close-knit secret group or something?"
: "Ah. We are indeed supposed to be. But Chloe has seized control of the Inquisition, and they're currently hunting me. They believe me to be responsible for this zombie outbreak, you see."
Holy fuck. The story thickens and I'm being honest about how I feel about this.
"But that isn't true! You sealed the rift to Hell - you're helping to end the zombie plague!"
: "Try telling the Inquisition that. They don't believe it. But enough of that. I have a task for you. Go south from here and surf to New Mauville. Dantalion is waiting there to instruct you further."
I'm interested in Snakewood as a story again. The moral ambiguity here is actually really cool. Even if everything is still piled on with a ton of nonsense.
"Have you seen the Pokemon Champion around at all?"
: "I believe you will find further information in New Mauville. Take it from me, it is imperative that you go there."
He sure has a one-track mind, this Gleis. It's blatantly obvious that he's just trying to play us as the patsy...
I still like him as a character, though.
Alright, cool! With that, we end off this episode of Snakewood with high(?) spirits. See you next time for a new update.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Team setup:
(Reggie,
, Level 25, has Leftovers,
/
) - Chilling out with the crew in the Pokecenter
(Bellamine,
, Level 24,
) - Having a conversation with Alice about level grinding
(Ambes,
, Level 24,
) - Relieved that he knows his little brother and sister are alive
(Zagon,
, Level 29, has Plus Band,
) - Shaking the blood and dirt from all the battles off of her fur
(Ace,
, Level 26, has Anadrin Talon,
/
) - Curious as to where he was this episode
(Benedict, Level 17,
/
) - * Twitch, twitch - crack, pop *
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Back-up Team:
(Alice,
, level 12,
) - Hopes that she gets to be used again
(Krusha,
, level 12,
/
) - Surprised that he was even considered as part of a team
(Ballin,
, level 14,
/
) - Wondering when he's going to be used
(Pumbloom,
, level 14,
) - Sleeping soundly
(Letro, level 15,
/
) - Closely observing the team
(Cherry,
, level 12,
/
) - Waiting passionately for the day she becomes a Bellossom or a Vileplume
(Shine,
, level 12,
) - "Tag! You're it, Spark!"
(Spark,
, level 12,
) -"Aw, no fair! I'll get you this time!"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Future Dan Says: In hindsight, every let's play I've been doing from now on has had some gimmick going for it... I guess double-chapter uploads is Snakewood's retroactive one.
Chapter 6 - Seaside Trouble
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Spoiler:
We are NOT messing around this update, folks.
Let's get this party started.
Haruko: "I knew it! I'll have to get the old anti-air gun working again. Anyway, thanks. Now, show me your true power!"
Awwwwww yeah.
Fuck the gym leader theme. This is where it's at.
It's Haruko from FLCL. And while her sprite looks a bit... sketchy, it's fine. That aside, Haruko is probably the toughest opponent you'll probably face so far and by god is the fight cool except for one last Mon. It's the longest fight so far standing at 20 screenshots.
She sends out a few fodder Mon, but don't be fooled by that Sneasel. It can Ice Punch you something fierce.
Absol and Luxray are the most dangerous Pokemon you'll probably have to face yet. Swords Dance Absol and the already pretty damn strong Luxray absolutely ripped apart the team in practice, which is why I had to evolve Reggie. Haruko also abuses the hell out of her Super Potion stock, so if you get these guys down to red, chances are very high that she'll just bring them back up to green.
She's smart, I'll give her that.
Oh NO. See, this was already after Absol used Swords Dance twice. It was strong enough to rip apart the entire team at its current strength and I wasn't sure if Haruko was going to use another Super Potion. So I just went with my gut.
Ace is the king of cool.
As for Reggie... you see this picture? Reggie has Leftovers, Leech Life and has poisoned the Luxray already. While not straight out brute force, Reggie essentially deadlocked Haruko's Luxray into a losing battle no matter how many Super Potions or Bulk Ups she uses.
I knew he would get a chance to shine.
The hell is a Kingma--
Say hello to another new Fakemon, folks. Kingmadio is a series of Madio-type Pokemon that do... things. I don't even know what to say about them other than "what the christ" because they're so odd.
This is its only attack, by the way. Even without Leftovers, Night Shade from this dude won't even leave a scratch. By the way, you're going to have to poison him. For you see, Kingmadio is a
A
CUTLERINE YOU SON OF A WHORE
At the very least you can wait for his Night Shade to run out or just poison him if you can... but really? You're going to do this? It's such a pacebreaker to what is otherwise a cool fight. It's a required fight too, so why would you just dump this ugly, nigh-invincible thing onto the player?
A millenium later, Kingmadio finally drops due to poison.
She gives us the badge, along with TM08 (aka. Bulk Up). She says she got the TM from Brawly, which is cool and all but I doubt we'll use it.
She doesn't really say much after that, but that's fine. Let's go back outside.
... Only to immediately get called by Birch.
Wasn't the reason we came here to look for Landon and May? Also, no, you killed(?) one. And that was because Ambes Star Platinum'ed it to death with Ice Punch.
And then he hangs up. The good professor is getting a bit testy.
"Hey, have you seen my brother by any chance? He's the Pokemon League Champion. I'm looking for him."
Kid: "Oh yeah! He surfed over here a couple weeks ago now with May. Said he'd found something amazing up in the desert, and he was going back for it."
[Jack is calling Birch]
Jack, please.
Anyway, now we have to go to Slateport and beyond.
Before we go, I should take note of this dark patch of divable water. It's probably going to contain some superbonus stuff later on, so remind me if I forget.
We are immediately greeted with a swimmer guy upon entering Route 107. Although you can just surf past him, I'm going to fight him anyway. In fact, a lot of the fights here are things you have just already seen.
Tabby: "The incredible -
Simon: "Psychic-"
Tabby: "Swimming siblings!"
What.
My thoughts exactly, Jack.
There's this lady blocked off on an island. She must be very important if she gets isolated like this.
"I came here from the Johto region, but got trapped by the zombies. I have to train up if I'm going to swim home!"
It's a nice touch that she has Johto Pokemon, actually. I like that. But unfortunately no training for you.
Oooh, a destroyed ship. Let's go inside.
"But no seriously, you should leave."
... Wh... what? Isn't that the same line of dialogue from the beginning of the game? Weird. Anyway, we can't go inside.
Go over here, and you can find a... RageCandyBar?? It essentially serves as the Rare Candy of this hack, but... wow. Let's not use it just yet.
"I was a sailor on that ship what the zombies got... so I became a pirate!"
Wait just a second.
The ZOMBIES got the ship? You've already established that there are things other than zombies that can destroy things, and zombies are weak to water. So why would you... bah. Never mind. Let's fight.
Hayseus. He has like three Meowths, by the way. Nothing too special.
Okay, Jesus.
Let's have a chat with this fine fellow.
Gentleman: "Ah, a young one!"
[Initiates a battle]
He has a Growlithe, a Shinx, a Ponyta and a Raticate. Nothing too hard.
By the way, medical bag. Just in case you needed a tune up. You can also find a Caramac if you go to the right.
MY LOVE IS GREATER THAN YOURS.
Now that we're actually on shore, we get jumped by this asshole.
Benedict gets another kill by themselves. They're growing up so fast.
I skipped the fight because it wasn't anything special, but this guy had a Linoone. Not fun.
And what could possibly be in the Seashore House? We already fought zombies, dragons, demons and one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
Huh. There doesn't seem to be anything in here. What's the problem?
"This child has been turned inside out, stuffed with salt, and then turned back out again. He is very well preserved."
Wha... what? How would that work? Since it mentioned salt, it couldn't have been a zombie that did it. Also, ewwwwww?
You get a Fire Stone for your troubles, though.
THE HELL?
Whoa, what? Look at this dude. He's like some deranged chef monster man. Meet the Former Chef class, everybody. They will be our enemies for Slateport and onward. And there's going to be a lot of them.
Whoa, level thirty. Munchlax here goes down without much of a fight, however. Thank you, Zagon.
Christ, do they have to shriek like banshees all of the time? I can only imagine if you heard this in real life, it would void some bowels.
[Former Chef runs offscreen at a speed I've never seen anybody go]
This is almost word-for-word what I thought when I first fought that guy.
"Wait a minute. The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse... that's Pestilence, Famine, War and Death. The only person that could have made a chef into that starved monster... would be Famine. This must be his dominion. I'd better tread carefully from here on out."
Ooooh. I like how the story is showing that each Horseman has a different kind of monster they control, to be honest. I mean, in the grand scheme of things this is probably distracting from the zombies, but I like rising threats in practically everything.
Before we go any further, let's go get a ton of soda.
Immediately upon stepping into Slateport, we get attacked by two Former Chefs. Both of them with Munchlaxes and...
Kirlia??
Why them of all Pokemon? Why not Gulpin or... another big eater type of Pokemon? But that aside, this is technically the first time you see the Gardevoir family.
That was one Leech Life. Reggie is hilariously powerful as a Parasect.
Moving on, we--
[Former Chef appears from the corpse of the girl]
Grody.
Aside from his entrance, this Chef is pretty much the same as the others.
How very Looney-Tunes-like. Also,
"This crate looks like it'd fall apart if bashed hard with a metal object such as an Arclight Spanner or something."
Very nice to know exactly what it is we need to break this thing.
Inside of the boat house, there's some holes on the right. There's nothing upstairs, by the way, so don't bother checking.
Sure, why the hell not.
Whoa. Where did we just wind up? It has the Abandoned Ship theme (
Gateau are the items that the Former Chefs tend to use when their Pokemon are at the red. Essentially they're Hyper Potions but with a fancy name.
Whoa, that's a funky overworld sprite. Let's go talk to that fellow.
He has two Hombone. I... don't even know what to say. Other than that in practice, Rock Blast from this thing killed Bellamine. Which was absolutely embarassing.
Zagon kills the first one with Surf (as Hombone are
Bide. No, really. Do you know what I could do in the meantime while waiting for you to use up Bide?
Bella stacks up like two Calm Minds while this dude is Biding, with absolutely wonderful results.
Like so. It's just a giant pile of dirt with a claw now. There is no coming back from that.
I don't understand how this guy does things. He wants to hide, but jumps out yelling "don't tell anybody I'm here". Like, come on.
Oh? If you guys read through Chapter 3.5 (Gameshark Fun), you'll recognize this room as a part we weren't meant to be at yet. Now we're here for real and that green-haired guy is going to talk to us.
???: "Why, you're in the SS Cangrejo, a submarine built by Mister Michaelangelo of Blue Sky Port in the Visbu region. I'm Usher, his second in command."
Cangrejo is the spanish word for crab, by the way.
Usher mentions that the submarine is busted and Mister Michelangelo doesn't want to pay repairs. Usher and his crew came to Hoenn to explore the underwater depths, but the submarine got stuck in the rocks.
Usher: "Well, our engineer could indeed fix it. But our engine room is flooded and full of nasty wild Pokemon... if you could clear them out, and also clear out the sea devils that came out of the ocean, then we can fix our engine and go."
I'm surprised out of everything Jack has seen at this point, he's scared of sea devils.
Usher: "Nope. Just jump down into that hole. That'll take you down to the lower levels."
This man.
[Jack walks to the hole in front of him and falls down a floor]
Well damn. Now we're in a brand new dungeon! But I'm afraid that's the end of this episode. See you next time on Snakewood for the ADVENTURES OF THE SS CANGREJO.
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Team setup:
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Chapter 7 - Nobody Expects the Hoenn Inquisition
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Spoiler:
If this submarine has holes and it's underwater, then how the hell is it not overflowing and sink--
Oh, hey, a new part.
Go down a bit and you'll see these crates. Remember the name Angel Laboratories because I think it might be important later on. I think, anyway.
"This elevator is clearly broken. It's not possible to go any further."
Remember this too, because I know for sure it will become important later.
That's a very noticable tiling error.
"An organ of some kind floats within, connected to the base with wires."
Ugh, nasty. This also gives me flashbacks to that creepy room in the Galactic headquarters where they kept the Lake Trio.
Go down here and I recommend you get into a fight.
For you see, there's Magnemite in the water. Believe it or not, you will need Magnemite later on for something in this submarine.
I should also mention that you can get Magnezone in this hack if you give Magneton a Thunder Stone, which is something that I honestly wish they did in the real games. It would only make sense.
Anyway, say hello to Letro.
Go to the right and you'll find this computer room that has practically everything you could need at the moment. A PC for switching, a bed, the works. I would stay here to wade out the horseman apocalypse if this place wasn't so dinged up, to be honest.
There's also this doohickey. For 600 Pokedollars, this thing pops out regular Pokeballs for you. Given how this is the only place you can get some at the moment, I like that Cutlerine did this.
I also found a Luvdisc and called him Love. Because... I felt like it. This is also the last we'll ever see of him.
Also, go down south a bit and you'll find this medical kit in case those Pokemon on the water kicked your ass.
Dive Balls just in case you needed them too.
The drawer Jack is standing in front of contains the Arclight Spanner but I didn't screenshot actually getting it. Whoops.
Go to the left and you'll see this giant machine thing. It's very particular about where you try to fix it.
Alright, cool. I guess the Magnemite event isn't quite this part yet.
"Oh! Thanks for fixing the engine! I came down here to look for the Engineer, but I couldn't find him. I haven't seen anybody about lately."
What would even try to get us down here? The sea devils? If Luvdisc counts as a sea devil then
Aw sweet. Usher's not that bad a guy after all.
[Fade to black followed by teleportation SFX]
"Sorry, the teleport is a little jumpy. I'll see you around sometime!"
[The submarine moves away]
... Alright, whatever I'm just rolling with it.
We're on Route 110 and the first thing we see is a FREE PORYGON2 LET'S SNATCH IT
[Celebi cry]
"This Porygon is clearly lost. Better leave it here, as it probably belongs to someone in Slateport."
Someone who's probably dead, you dingus! Do I have to steal it away for you, Jack?!?
Feh. Let's go into the grass.
(* Disclaimer: Pichu do not appear in the wild at all, this is purely gamesharked for the sake of additional plot *)
WHOA, HELLO.
[My personal song choice for this scene: Reunion]
[The two Pichus hitch a ride on Jack's shoulders.]
[Current audio in-game: A version of the Team Rocket encounter theme]
As Jack and crew try to advance forward, they are stopped by an offscreen military march. As for the remix of the Team Rocket theme from Gold/Silver, I kinda like it.
"What was that? Sounded like a military band. But that theme song was decidedly evil... Perhaps I ought to investigate?"
Yes, Jack, let's follow the evil music. That can't possibly end badly.
They replaced the Trick Master house with a Pokecenter. That's probably the most useful thing in this hack so far.
"This Pokecenter was only just built when the chefs and zombies arrived here. I hate to think what I would've done without it."
You and me both. Cause god damn it, even with Zagon's beautiful head smashing, we get hurt way too often.
"I wish I could go home... I want to see if my parents are still alive..."
I can really get behind this sentiment. But given the situation, Jack is probably the only person that can really survive the outright horse-shit shenanigans outside.
Letro, you're cool and all, but we already have a perfectly good electric type. Benedict needs all the screentime he/she/it deserves.
[My choice of music for this scene: Going My Way]
[They both hug Ambes]
With that little (added purely of my own accord) exchange out of the way, we make it to Slateport and goddamn is the place a mess. Every house is completely deserted, including the Pokemart. The Contest Hall is gone too, but I don't think anybody was that broken up about it.
Go over to the Pokemon Fan Club and you can get a Kilin Horn, which is pretty much just Snakewood's equivalent to the Soothe Bell.
Kilin, otherwise known as Qilin, is a figure in Chinese Mythology that's recognized as a good omen. It appears as a hooved chimera-like creature with fire covering its body. Aka. badass.
Go over to the open market area, and it turns out this is where everybody in Slateport retreated to.
"The survivors are clustered here, in the market, because these monster chefs can't stand food. The smell of our supplies keep them at bay."
Okay, this is a genuinely cool idea. Because the Former Chefs stand as minions of Famine, they can't stand food. They're anti-chefs. This weakness also doesn't completely cripple them like the zombies because unlike water and salt, food eventually goes away.
Not only that, the chefs are nightmarishly fast and strong...
"This uniform? It's the Hoenn Internal Affairs Army uniform. I'm a soldier you see."
If Hoenn had an army and the zombies are weak to water, why couldn't they just shoot saltwater at the zombies fire-hose style and bottleneck them that way?
Oh right yeah this is Snakewood, don't think too hard about it.
"N-no, I'm not stealing the supplies!"
This guy is probably going to get everybody killed. Karma works in mysterious ways, dude.
"I need a powerful Pokemon so I can get out of this city. If you have a Faceleech, would you like to trade? I can give you a Munchlax in exchange. After all, it's useless..."
I would if I could, but I just can't. Also, Faceleech?
Oh, this is where the Name Rater wound up. Cool. I'll probably need him in the future for some re-naming.
side talk: I don't understand why you can't just freely nickname your Pokemon. Why does a crusty old guy have to decide it for y... never mind.
The Energy Guru here will sell you Snakewood's version of the EV increasing nutrients. Only they're all candy. I would do this, but a competitive team in a hacked game is rather unfeasible.
Here's a chef, but he has the usual. When you beat a Chef that's not critical to the story, they just run away.
This guy's in trouble, though. Let's save him before he gets munched!
More zombie twins. Ugggggh.
They have Charmeworm and Shrivelsaur like would expect. However, the only reason I'm showing this fight off is because they have a "brand new" zombie Pokemon up their sleeve.
Oh and this too, because that's pure garbage.
Our favorite deformed Jynx and... Electabugs. The puns don't stop getting any dumber. But don't let his name fool you - Electabugs is a bonafide badass. His Thunder Punch is the equivalent of getting your face smashed in with Thor's Hammer. Believe me, it's not pretty.
Thankfully,
This man thanks you for saving his life, but he doesn't give you anything in return.
This is what's over here, by the way. It leads back to Oldale... and honestly, I'm not quite in the mood for backtracking.
Back on Route 110, we get jumped by a survivor.
R-Rockit!? His name is really Rockit. Poor bastard.
Name aside, he didn't have much to offer in terms of a fight. But apparently he came across the evil military crew too.
In the grass ahead, I caught Krusha and Cherry. Because trust me, they will prove incredibly useful later on.
Plus I like Bellossom.
Future Dan: Wow, this has to be the most wrong I've ever been considering they're one of the few Pokemon I have that don't even make it to the end of their own respective game. It's not that big of a spoiler, to be honest.
Wait what? The guys with the funny hair are the Inquisition?!
These Inquisition Footmen have the Magma/Aqua Boss theme playing like they're SERIOUS BUSINESS, too.
Sadly though, he only has a Hombone and two Nosepasses. Which is almost alarmingly inappropriate for a theme as BADASS as the Magma/Aqua leader theme.
These Inquisition guys all look like purple-haired Lances to me.
"Oh... What should I do? I ought to tell the boss I failed, but I don't want to face her wrath... I guess I better just stay here."
You know, given your Pokemon set-up, that's actually a very smart idea.
Huh? Look to the left. It's that Charizard again... who is also blocked off by a Rock Smash rock. We get rockblocked at almost every turn, have you noticed?
Keep these coming.
But I was the one who talked to you. I would have slipped by if it wasn't for the fact you had a new Pokemon.
It's Lunatone. Not that it's hard or anything, but I should mention that these things legitimately creep me out. The evil red eyes and the eerie droning cry they make have haunted me ever since I first saw them in vanilla Sapphire.
Was he stopping us just so we don't get hurt? I appreciate the thought, guy, but--
Oh god damn it.
Nanab berries? Well, sure, but I don't imagine Pokeblocks being that useful.
Yeah, okay, whatever.
He has a Graveler of all things. It's not that much harder than a Hombone considering they both have the same type, but what the hell.
This guy should have known that part of the set Linoone can learn is SURF or that there are Water Pokemon everywhere. Although, how a giant raccoon can just spontaneously summon a river's worth of water is beyond me.
Hey, there's one of my favorite songs again! As for Mauville, I like the redesign it got in ORAS a lot more than the original. Although the lack of ease for egg grinding annoyed me quite a bit.
"It's a corpse. Its head has been completely reversed and filled with sand from the ears. There seems to be no reason to this."
I like how even the game is acknowledging that this is getting really dumb. Also, this guy has nothing for you to loot, so move on.
There IS a working Pokemart here, though. Thank the lord too.
"Well, well. I thought you might make it this far, Jack."
My exact question.
It better be cool.
[Gleis and Jack walk towards the front of the Pokecenter]
Those weird overworld sprites are Hombone, by the way. Also, the zombies are attacking with Zigzagoon which are not zombie Pokemon in this game.
[Current audio: The Team Rocket theme again]
[Gleis makes us invisible. A lady accompanied by two zombies come in from above and... clip through three of the NPCs in front of them. Whoops.]
[The grunts put the Hombones back into their Pokeballs]
Guys, why do you have Hombone? There are much better Pokemon you could be using right now.
[Flash of light followed by Rock Smash SFX]
Whoa. She just transitioned them out of existence! That's neat, actually.
???: "You! Minions! Return to base."
[The Inquisition members leave to the left. The zombies head up to the north. The Mauville theme starts playing as normal again.]
Honestly, it's cool to see more Taoists than just Gleis.
"Aren't you Taoists a close-knit secret group or something?"
Holy fuck. The story thickens and I'm being honest about how I feel about this.
"But that isn't true! You sealed the rift to Hell - you're helping to end the zombie plague!"
I'm interested in Snakewood as a story again. The moral ambiguity here is actually really cool. Even if everything is still piled on with a ton of nonsense.
"Have you seen the Pokemon Champion around at all?"
He sure has a one-track mind, this Gleis. It's blatantly obvious that he's just trying to play us as the patsy...
I still like him as a character, though.
Alright, cool! With that, we end off this episode of Snakewood with high(?) spirits. See you next time for a new update.
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Team setup:
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Back-up Team:
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